Forgiveness

[Annette]

On 8/23/2018 at 4:52 PM, john1 said:

If you want revenge, here's a good way to do it, but I would still pray for the person.

Proverbs chapter 25 verse 21

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.

and verse 22

In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.

 

 

It wouldn't say this in Proverbs if we shouldn't do it, it bothers me when I do it, but what else am I to do it says the lord will reward you.

Hi John. It is amazing how God's instruction is so often different from what our natural response will be.  

[Annette]

On 8/24/2018 at 10:09 AM, Wayne222 said:

So true Annette. Thanks for bringing this subject up Forgiveness is number one in walking with God

You are welcome Wayne. I like it when people feel free to share their thoughts.  God bless. 

[Annette]

On 8/24/2018 at 6:07 PM, Fidei Defensor said:

Thanks for staring the thread Annette. It is nice to have some positive threads to focus on the essentials, particularly our Lord Jesus Christ and His forgiveness.  

You are welcome FD.  Thank you for participating. 

[Annette]

On 8/24/2018 at 6:28 PM, ayin jade said:

I dont think we should wait until we go through other emotions before we choose to forgive. 

Jesus said we have to forgive. Thats it. That is His command to us. No matter what it is, we are to forgive. It may be that we have to also ask the Lord to change our hard hearts so that we can forgive someone, but it is still commanded to us to forgive. 

A few years ago, my brother in law was murdered. That is unbelievably hard to forgive, and yet since He said to, I had to. I prayed for the murderer to get saved (still do when I remember) and I prayed that He soften my hard heart. I will never meet the murderer. I cant deal with crazy. But I have forgiven him and pray for him. 

 

Thank you for sharing this experience that you have had to personally walk through and deal with. 

I know that forgiveness is not always easy.  Especially when loved ones are involved.  I think it is a great that you have been able to pray for the guy who did this.

We have recently had a family member go through a difficult time. And have been praying for the person who has caused the pain. 

Continuing to pray for you too Ayin Jade.

[GandalfTheWise]

On 8/23/2018 at 2:23 PM, Annette said:

Hi guys 

I am sure this is something we all have to deal with on a regular,  if not daily basis.  

If this is the case for you, what comes to mind when you have to extend or receive forgiveness. 

Sometimes just reading what someone takes the time to share, helps look at something in a totally new way. 

Look forward to reading what you share.  

God bless. 

The two biggest things that helped me become much more understanding and as a result more forgiving in *day to day* stuff were:

1. Taking my first Myers-Briggs survey online.  (My view of it now is that it is more hype than substance and don't recommend it.)  It was the time I first ran into the idea of different personality types and realized how different people can be.  Behaviors I used to see as annoying and stubborn were merely what they were like.  Over time, I started to see differences not as right and wrong, or strengths and weaknesses, but rather as God-given characteristics that allowed them to be better at certain things than I was in different situations.   Over the years, I found that what often annoyed me the most was people asserting their characteristics in situations those characteristics are weaknesses rather than strengths.  I used to get frustrated.  Now I usually see it more sadly or an opportunity to try to help them work toward those things they are good at doing.

2. The second was starting to see people as unique creations of God whom the fall of mankind, attacks of the enemy, hurts, pains, and injuries from the world, and other emotional and spiritual trauma, bondages, and burdens have corrupted and damaged that God-given uniqueness.  Many people carry deep spiritual and emotional injuries, crippling bondage and burdens, and deep lies buried within.   Many of the sins and most inexplicable behaviors I see in people are often symptoms of much deeper things that God needs to free them from.  Seeing people as being on a path of growth from spiritual immaturity with many things that need God's healing and work in order to mature and become that unique work of art God is making them into really changed how I see people and how I react to things that annoy, hurt, and frustrate me.

The first place I really saw the 2nd thing in action was a Christian forum (now offline) I was on a number of years ago.  The main principle that most people adhered to was to assume the best of the other person.  If someone was testy, you assumed that they were having an awful day and you acted to defuse things or find out what was wrong.  If someone wrote something inane, you assumed they were distracted, phrased something badly, were sleep deprived, or had been in a weird cult for awhile and responded accordingly.   If someone disagreed, you assumed that they had a good reason (at least in their mind) to do so, and that in their years of walking with God they might have learned something you could learn from.  If the tone of a post was ambiguous, you assumed the best possible tone.   There was a "no person left behind" type of love that drew people in and kept them there.  There was a "Christ died for you, nothing you say or do changes that for me,  and I will not give up on you" mentality that deeply affected me.  It was one of the first times I had ever seen a group of Christians consistently look past spoken words and behavior and try to discern what they really needed to do to actually help and not just react.  I learned a lot from that.

To some extent, these things have helped me with the bigger things as well, but that often requires more effort on my part and sometimes some spiritual working of God in me.   It's also not to say I don't avoid some people for self-protection at times, but trying to see people through God's eyes as the unique individuals He is working to form them into as new creations in Christ makes it much easier to deal with many things.  It wasn't so much that I became better at forgiving, it's just that I started to see people differently and there were less things I needed to forgive.