I’m an artist

[Tiana M]

I’m an artist and I often look on Instagram and see other artists post these things that are lustful and homosexual like images. If that makes any sense. And sometimes I want to draw that type of thing too and I know that I shouldn’t because that’s not ok in God’s eyes. And today I’ve just been having doubts about what if we are wrong about our worldview. Then what? I wasn’t able to draw the things I sometimes desired to draw. And it would be a regret then. Not being able to do what I wanted to do. Or at least not doing EVERYTHING I wanted to do. What do I do? I don’t like having this desire to draw such things, and I want it to go away. But it comes back everytime I look back on Instagram and I see those lusty-gay posts. Idk if anyone can relate to this. I feel like I’m the only one who struggles with this. And I want to still be a Christian, but at the same time I have these desires. 
 

Any advice that anyone can give would be greatly appreciated. And please pray for me to overcome these desires. I don’t like wanting to draw such things. 
P.S I usually draw some pretty neutral stuff, I don’t draw the “lusty/gay” stuff. But I want to.

[Tiana M]

I did create my own website, but I use Instagram too because I have a bigger audience on there than I do my website at the moment. And the followers I have on Instagram view my site from time to time. 

What if I like limited my time on there or don’t go on the explore page, because that’s where a lot of this comes from, and sometimes from the people I follow when they share other artists work?

[Repose]

I don't really dawdle with social media - unless you include this site and YouTube - so I guess I can't be super helpful. Isn't it a matter of different sites having different cultures, though? Birds of a feather flock together, as they say. Maybe you could find a different populated platform to use, one that posts more neutral art. I don't know of a site that lacks a negative rep, though. Deviant art and Tumblr are kind of... Yikes. Either that or block the artists that post that stuff.

As for the desire to draw it, could it just be a desire to fit in? It's like if suddenly, wearing top hats became a big trend. You see her wearing one, him wearing one, that group over there donning them... And they get noticed because of it. You get the urge to wear a top hat, too.

However, a trend is merely a trend. It lasts for a short while and fizzes out. Sure, some people will look at your homosexual depiction and like it, and then they'll move on. Now that it's out there on the web, though, that never leaves you. Even if you mainly draw flowers and animals, the thing most will focus on is that picture. Make art that lasts, that speaks to many human hearts and will continue to do so for some time. All those famous painters made timeless pieces. They did not paint two pretty anime boys mud wrestling in the nude.

Though yes, of course, prayer is good as well.

[Coliseum]

3 hours ago, Tiana M said:

I’m an artist and I often look on Instagram and see other artists post these things that are lustful and homosexual like images. If that makes any sense. And sometimes I want to draw that type of thing too and I know that I shouldn’t because that’s not ok in God’s eyes. And today I’ve just been having doubts about what if we are wrong about our worldview. Then what? I wasn’t able to draw the things I sometimes desired to draw. And it would be a regret then. Not being able to do what I wanted to do. Or at least not doing EVERYTHING I wanted to do. What do I do? I don’t like having this desire to draw such things, and I want it to go away. But it comes back everytime I look back on Instagram and I see those lusty-gay posts. Idk if anyone can relate to this. I feel like I’m the only one who struggles with this. And I want to still be a Christian, but at the same time I have these desires. 
 

Any advice that anyone can give would be greatly appreciated. And please pray for me to overcome these desires. I don’t like wanting to draw such things. 
P.S I usually draw some pretty neutral stuff, I don’t draw the “lusty/gay” stuff. But I want to.

Hi Tiana.

I was talking with an 86 year old man about whether he still had lustful temptations at that age. He turned his head toward me and said, "It never goes away." That is part of the flesh that Paul said, "For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out." So what do we do? We must run to Jesus and ask him to do for us what we are not able to do in ourselves. We cannot free ourselves from having a sin nature. Jesus knew that when he chose us before the foundations of the earth that there would be a Tiana in the world who would sin. His blood at the Cross already covers you. Instead of focusing on you and your unworthiness, focus on Jesus and his worthiness, and in time, your love for him will find you desiring to do what is right more and more. Our heart is what Jesus wants, not our outward compliance. If you simply force yourself, you may stop drawing, but if Jesus is not motivating your actions, you will always crave it in your heart. The more you scold yourself, the harder it is to stop because then it is on you instead of Christ in you. Blessings to you.

Edited January 1, 2020 by Coliseum

[Tiana M]

1 hour ago, Repose said:

I don't really dawdle with social media - unless you include this site and YouTube - so I guess I can't be super helpful. Isn't it a matter of different sites having different cultures, though? Birds of a feather flock together, as they say. Maybe you could find a different populated platform to use, one that posts more neutral art. I don't know of a site that lacks a negative rep, though. Deviant art and Tumblr are kind of... Yikes. Either that or block the artists that post that stuff.

As for the desire to draw it, could it just be a desire to fit in? It's like if suddenly, wearing top hats became a big trend. You see her wearing one, him wearing one, that group over there donning them... And they get noticed because of it. You get the urge to wear a top hat, too.

However, a trend is merely a trend. It lasts for a short while and fizzes out. Sure, some people will look at your homosexual depiction and like it, and then they'll move on. Now that it's out there on the web, though, that never leaves you. Even if you mainly draw flowers and animals, the thing most will focus on is that picture. Make art that lasts, that speaks to many human hearts and will continue to do so for some time. All those famous painters made timeless pieces. They did not paint two pretty anime boys mud wrestling in the nude.

Though yes, of course, prayer is good as well.

Thank you, I’ll keep that I mind. Most of the images that entice me to want to draw those things pop up on the explore feed. Do you think if I stopped going on the explore feed it will help? Also sometimes other artists shout out other artists that draw those things on their Instagram story, should I not look at those Instagram stories either? Hopefully those questions made sense just now.

And I don’t think my desire is out of following a trend, like sometimes I genuinely wish that being homosexual was ok, so that I can draw those types of things.

[JohnD]

Yours is not so unique a dilemma. Perhaps the homosexuality is more rare on sites like this. 

But "pet sins" are common to all. Pet sins being those sins we are most tempted by, you know, the ones

we always make excuses for doing... talk ourselves into, then feel guilty as hell about after we cave into

it again and again.

Especially sex sins.

It is so trite for people to say... "don't do dat!"

I will say there comes a time when wisdom sets in and we learn to avoid that which tempts us severely as

we avoid most everything that makes us miserable... because in the end... what seems so good in the temptation phase

really sucks rocks in the end as (once again) bitter guilt

pummels us and the devil just laughs and laughs....

Well meaning folks figured making the things people cannot handle illegal

was the answer.

It may mask things for a time, lust, drugs, gambling etc.

always finds its way back into the mainstream toleration...

because they are all seated in the human heart.

That's where the true battle lies... within our self.

This is what Jesus meant by being guilt of murder for hating your brother.

First and foremost... do not allow yourself or anyone else (including the devil) 

make you believe your salvation depends on your performance in life or as a Christian.

If you believe in the genuine Jesus Christ, you are saved.

That's according to God's Word. Not mine. Not anyone else's.

You cannot earn salvation. You cannot lose your salvation. 

God saves you and keeps you saved... even if that means he must take you out of this life 

to do so(1 Corinthians 5:5).  once you are saved, you cannot walkaway (Jeremiah 32:40 / 1 John 3:18-19).

One of the hang ups of the traditionalist churches is burying believers under a ton of do's and don't s  because they

do not put the dividing line between New and Old Testaments where it belongs (on the Cross of Christ see Hebrews

9:16-17). All those do's and don't s  before Jesus died on the cross that people foist upon Christians only contradict the

grace. The Law (though a great tool / guide for navigating through this life) is impossible for we fallen human beings to keep. 

Jesus fills in the gaps (once we believe in him) with HIS righteousness. Only HE ever kept the Law.  And his righteousness is

imputed to our individual accounts to make up the difference... freeing us to sin? No. Freeing us to serve in our individual ministry

to win others to faith in Christ.

You do not win people over to God by guilt tripping them, burning them at the stake or with the wood of a faggot bush.

You reach them with like-mindedness, being able to identify with them and they you... and you share the LOVING Jesus Christ

who said to the woman caught in adultery (while still under the Law, mind you) "Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more..."

meaning make that your goal but don't fool yourself... we all sin every day.

1 John 1:5 - 1 John 2:17 ← read as a single block passage and read it over and over with the tutelage of the Holy Spirit until it

sinks in... God is restoring our perception of our unending walk with him by removing our guilty conscience in individual sins 

all we need do is confess them to him (Psalm51:4) in the Greek homologeo (to come alongside) to agree with God (who already knows

what we did or did not do).... I sinned. I blew it Lord. And move on.

And if the devil reminds you of your past, just remind yourself of his future.

God never moves away from those he loves and promises to never leave.

He can and does discipline us... lost opportunities, health, jobs, loved ones, homes...

The chastening of a loving father the Apostle Paul mentions.

We are his children.

You also cannot compare yourself to others. Their calling, their vocations, their sin

tendencies all qualify them to reach out to sinners of the same kind. 

So, stop making the ideal Christian life to be like the ones in the stained glass windows.

The manger scene particularly irks me.

The King of Kings and Lord of Lords was birthed in a smelly, filthy barn stall and slept in a food trough.

Mary was heavy with child the entire journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem.

She was considered to be a harlot for being pregnant by someone other than her betrothed (Joseph), and he 

was looked upon as a fool for not divorcing her or having her stoned.  It took the angel Gabriel to convince

Joseph that Mary was innocent and that her virgin pregnancy was a divine miracle. But the people were

unconvinced, and the stigma of all of this fell upon the rest of the children born to Mary and Joseph. 

Solomon has 900 wives and concubines (most of which led him astray with foreign gods).

David had fewer wives but committed adultery and had the husband of Bathsheba murdered... 

Moses murdered an Egyptian.

The Apostle Paul was repeatedly beaten to within an inch of his life.

The Apostles (all but John) were brutalized and martyred.

I say this to burst the lying bubble taught in most Churches who paint a

glorious, sin-free, pain-free, experience as a Christian.

This they do on the one hand, and on the other hand they lay heavy burdens on people do's and don't s... 

and make out like you are less than a Christian if you don't abide by their interpretation of scripture or life.

You must enter in to a confab with the Holy Spirit over the precise issue you are feeling guilty over.  He will never lead you

astray.  Trust him. Test the spirits (1 John 4:1) by the scriptures (Acts 17:11) to be sure it's the Holy Spirit. And trust him.

[JohnD]

If I were an artist, I would want to delve into the deepest mystery 

of things like homosexuality: specifically the need to get affirmation  

from everyone. This is what fuels the fire of the various gay movements.

The art would get them to consider or face the reality that they seek

affirmation from the one person they will never ever get it...

God?

No.

Themselves.

You see, God created us with an innate sense of what sex and sexuality is. 

This is why anyone of any form of sexual deviance (heterosexual or homosexual) 

has that guilty gnawing in their gut.

God created sex and sexuality to procreate and sustain the human race until

judgment day.

He created the prototype for sex: one man for one woman for one lifetime.

That means lust (showing and looking and fantasizing... all of it). Reserved solely

for one's spouse.

Now... there is virtually no one on planet earth capable of following that model (prototype).

Come to thing of it, that would be some art if I could depict all that in it. ha ha

[Hruodperht]

6 hours ago, Tiana M said:

I did create my own website, but I use Instagram too because I have a bigger audience on there than I do my website at the moment. And the followers I have on Instagram view my site from time to time. 

What if I like limited my time on there or don’t go on the explore page, because that’s where a lot of this comes from, and sometimes from the people I follow when they share other artists work?

If you desire an audience for your work, I would recommend ArtStation. It is free to join, you can set your account to exclude "mature" content, and the community there is very helpful (I have a friend who is an artist and frequents the place). But I do not do anything with Instagram, due to many things I have heard about the site; it does not hold much for me, nor anyone else I know of.

Edited January 1, 2020 by Hruodperht
additional information for Tiana M

[AnOrangeCat]

8 hours ago, Tiana M said:

I’m an artist and I often look on Instagram and see other artists post these things that are lustful and homosexual like images. If that makes any sense. And sometimes I want to draw that type of thing too and I know that I shouldn’t because that’s not ok in God’s eyes. And today I’ve just been having doubts about what if we are wrong about our worldview. Then what? I wasn’t able to draw the things I sometimes desired to draw. And it would be a regret then. Not being able to do what I wanted to do. Or at least not doing EVERYTHING I wanted to do. What do I do? I don’t like having this desire to draw such things, and I want it to go away. But it comes back everytime I look back on Instagram and I see those lusty-gay posts. Idk if anyone can relate to this. I feel like I’m the only one who struggles with this. And I want to still be a Christian, but at the same time I have these desires. 

You've recognized that the explore feed brings it to the forefront, so cutting that out seems in order. It's in the spirit of what Jesus said in Matthew 5:29: "If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell." If you stop looking at a feed that stirs up those feelings you're doing just what Jesus said to do.

Aside from that it could be beneficial to analyze why you have those thoughts. Is it lust? Is it because of the money they make doing commissions? Something more? Just being rhetorical here. There's no need to answer that here. It's just that if you can identify and address the underlying source of the feelings it can be a useful tool in dealing with the problem along with prayer. Finally there's Romans 12:2 to keep in mind. "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

What we see and experience affects us, sometimes quickly and profoundly, but often it's a more slow and gradual event. We can't always control what we experience, but what we can control, we should. Take in the things that help us focus on Christ and cut out the things that entice us to sin.

[Tiana M]

3 hours ago, Sonshine said:

Hi again, Tiana.  Your questions indicate to me that you know what is the right thing to do.  In Galatians 6:4, we are instructed to examine our own work and in this way, we can rejoice when we choose to do the right thing.  It must be you yourself who must “fix it.”  Do you want to follow Jesus or do you not want to follow Jesus?

Yes I want to keep following Jesus. I feel it is the best thing to do in this world.