Knowing where and how "What path"

[LittlePebble10]

First off I noticed the back grounds and themes have been upgraded. This forum must have gotten a new dedicated server. Either that or a spot of brilliance from the techs involved with this forum. Congratulations to the owner of the dedicated server! Most importantly I do understand my concept of taking the Bible as a whole instead of taking a single scripture and isolating it often offends people. I feel like if I give up now then my faith would not be a pebble much less a pebble to the power of 2. I suppose you could say my studies in the binary number system has been moving along well. So why am I here asking for advice?

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Well my fathers' IT noticed my big project in sound synthesis. Said he would like to see if I could learn the material in software. The problem is that I am scared to go back to college. I rather be an assistant then to be something that required a degree. I also have my calling in becoming a published writer and a recognized artist to think about. When I look at my life I know God has called me to write and create very deep and meaningful art. Specifically in anthropomorphic anatomy. This is often times called the Furry subculture. As you may have guessed artists in this subculture span very wide. The one story that really helps me stay focused is the biographies of C. S. Lewis and J. R. R. Tolkien. They were the closest friends that you could ever imagine. Then one day they were anything but, friends. I lost a friend to the transgender LGBT debates. He told me that he could not be friends with some one who spreads hate and lies about the LGBT. He blocked me on FB as well as broke off any connection to the Church that we went to. I stuck with my Church even though I needed to distance myself for a little while.

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I started going back for College and young career Church. We call it Remix even though our thing is contemporary Christianity instead of hymnal. In simple words our lessons are based off of a theme instead of going in Chronological order of the Bibles Books. The new topic was in sexual purity. I won't go into details sense this might not be the place to. However, its got me thinking about my career life. If I go back to college I will be facing a risk of Liberal ideology being forced on me. If I am promoting my art and writing I would not be surprised if I get attacked for being Christian. The college nearby creates equal opportunity and even has connections to my Church. This would be an ideal place to try again. I failed in the past because I was in algebra where the last topic we hit was the study of x,y graphs, and systems of equations. The very next class was Pre-Calculus where the first thing we were to learn was the parent equations. I was still getting the hang of factoring polynomials. I put up a good fight until we got to synthetic division. I could not have asked for a better teacher. However, time was very limited and we had to get into regular calculus by the next semester. The final straw was when I attempted tech school. Long story short the teacher knew nothing about algebra and when I tried to learn his arrhythmic the teacher refused to talk to me after class. Said that I needed to grow up and realize no one will teach me. Either I was to pick it up or decide to leave. I mentioned this story before, but thats the jist of it. So in general I am not sure if I have a clear understanding of what path I need to take next.

[LonerAndy]

5 hours ago, LittlePebble10 said:

First off I noticed the back grounds and themes have been upgraded. This forum must have gotten a new dedicated server. Either that or a spot of brilliance from the techs involved with this forum. Congratulations to the owner of the dedicated server! Most importantly I do understand my concept of taking the Bible as a whole instead of taking a single scripture and isolating it often offends people. I feel like if I give up now then my faith would not be a pebble much less a pebble to the power of 2. I suppose you could say my studies in the binary number system has been moving along well. So why am I here asking for advice?

.

Well my fathers' IT noticed my big project in sound synthesis. Said he would like to see if I could learn the material in software. The problem is that I am scared to go back to college. I rather be an assistant then to be something that required a degree. I also have my calling in becoming a published writer and a recognized artist to think about. When I look at my life I know God has called me to write and create very deep and meaningful art. Specifically in anthropomorphic anatomy. This is often times called the Furry subculture. As you may have guessed artists in this subculture span very wide. The one story that really helps me stay focused is the biographies of C. S. Lewis and J. R. R. Tolkien. They were the closest friends that you could ever imagine. Then one day they were anything but, friends. I lost a friend to the transgender LGBT debates. He told me that he could not be friends with some one who spreads hate and lies about the LGBT. He blocked me on FB as well as broke off any connection to the Church that we went to. I stuck with my Church even though I needed to distance myself for a little while.

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I started going back for College and young career Church. We call it Remix even though our thing is contemporary Christianity instead of hymnal. In simple words our lessons are based off of a theme instead of going in Chronological order of the Bibles Books. The new topic was in sexual purity. I won't go into details sense this might not be the place to. However, its got me thinking about my career life. If I go back to college I will be facing a risk of Liberal ideology being forced on me. If I am promoting my art and writing I would not be surprised if I get attacked for being Christian. The college nearby creates equal opportunity and even has connections to my Church. This would be an ideal place to try again. I failed in the past because I was in algebra where the last topic we hit was the study of x,y graphs, and systems of equations. The very next class was Pre-Calculus where the first thing we were to learn was the parent equations. I was still getting the hang of factoring polynomials. I put up a good fight until we got to synthetic division. I could not have asked for a better teacher. However, time was very limited and we had to get into regular calculus by the next semester. The final straw was when I attempted tech school. Long story short the teacher knew nothing about algebra and when I tried to learn his arrhythmic the teacher refused to talk to me after class. Said that I needed to grow up and realize no one will teach me. Either I was to pick it up or decide to leave. I mentioned this story before, but thats the jist of it. So in general I am not sure if I have a clear understanding of what path I need to take next.

So couple of things.

1.  Jesus said that you will lose relationships in this life.  If you didn't lose any friends because of your faith, then you are doing it wrong.  That doesn't mean it won't hurt, but this is part of the Christian life.

2.  I always cringe when people say "I have a calling".

If you have a calling to be something, you'd be it by now.

Mark Gungor has a great talk about people who say they have a "calling".  He talks about a man he met who claimed he had a calling to be in children's ministry.  The man went from church to church to church, doing children's ministry, and being fired.  He was terrible at it.  He was not called to be in Children's ministry.

Gungor said that his own experience with being "called" was that when G-d shut every window and door, and opened one path to follow, and then set the house on fire, he would feel "Called" to go in that direction.

3.  Lastly, I generally do not believe in clear cut paths.

I don't think there is a destiny that is pre-mapped out for you, that if you pick the wrong path, then you are doomed forever.

Now obviously, if you pick an evil path, then yeah, that's going to wreck your life. If you start screwing another man's wife, or sleeping around, or join some pagan group to try and destroy Christianity.... right of course that is going to wreck your life.

But when it comes to picking your general path, and what job you choose, I don't think G-d is overly concerned with whether you work at McDonald's or Wendy's, or if you go to college, or do not.

In Psalms 37:23 it says

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.  Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand.

What's the key in that verse?   Steps. You have to take the steps.  If you are good, and upright, and you walk forward, G-d will guide your path.

Have you ever been on a boot that wasn't moving?  What does that rudder do, when the boat isn't moving?  Nothing.

Same with a car.  Ever turn the steering wheel of a car that isn't moving?   Doesn't do anything.   In order to guide the direction of a boat, or a car, it must be moving.   In order for G-d to guide you, you must be moving.

[LittlePebble10]

2 hours ago, DDisconnect said:

There are furry Christians out there, I'm sure, but... In my experience, they are not common. Most furries are a part of the LGBT+ community - only 20% of them identify as straight. There is that weird subset called The Furred Reich, but I doubt that's who you'd want to appeal to. I don't mean to rain on the parade here, you can give Christian furry literature a go, but I just have to be honest in that I'm not sure if a very steady career could be made from it. I could see it being more of a potential side hustle, especially if there are enough furry Christians out there, you could find your niche.

A degree is nice, but not always necessary. If you can prove proficiency outside of a degree, there are places that will take you in. My dad never went to school for welding and yet he's one of the most prized welders at his plant. I don't work at the steel fabricator anymore but they took me in just fine when it turned out I had natural welding ability. You can even call up accounting places and ask about getting in there. They'll consider you if you seem to know what it's all about, at the very least, they could put you on payroll to start out. A fair number of folks just skip over the process if they just show up eager and willing to learn. Guaranteed if you showed up somewhere where your knowledge would be a natural boost, you know...

As for what path to actually take though, I can't really comment too much on that. That's something better off being asked of God. I hope you figure it out though - I'll be praying for you.

I actually have several furry friends who are Christian. A lot of them are attacked by the LGBT as you probably can imagine. One of my friends has an OC that is a Dragon. I have two OC's because its based on the therapeutic concept of age regression. One is comparable to the age of ten, but also imagines himself the age of a toddler. His name is Lily because in my books he was born in a river full of water lilies. His species has to do with live birth and being covered in fur. My other OC is a scaly dragon comparable to the age of 20. Although he tends to doubt himself and can be compared to the age of 16 because he really cant grasp adult maturity perfectly. The Brony fandom and the Furry subculture does not directly translate to LGBT.

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Some of us prefer to use this as a coping strategy or a way to make new friends. My little Pony was supposed to be about making deep meaningful friendships before politics hit it like a tun of bricks. We had an anthem. We would say, "love and tolerate." We encouraged one another to fight the media that told lies. Some people committed suicide of the school bullies. Can you imagine? Not even in middle school yet and children are ending it all because their friendship was something special. I still stand by the old anthem to, "love and tolerate." Only now its a fight within our own community because of the politics that hit recently. Season 9 actually was an epic fail because Hasbro was trying to get out of these problems with politics.   

2 hours ago, LonerAndy said:

So couple of things.

1.  Jesus said that you will lose relationships in this life.  If you didn't lose any friends because of your faith, then you are doing it wrong.  That doesn't mean it won't hurt, but this is part of the Christian life.

2.  I always cringe when people say "I have a calling".

If you have a calling to be something, you'd be it by now.

Mark Gungor has a great talk about people who say they have a "calling".  He talks about a man he met who claimed he had a calling to be in children's ministry.  The man went from church to church to church, doing children's ministry, and being fired.  He was terrible at it.  He was not called to be in Children's ministry.

Gungor said that his own experience with being "called" was that when G-d shut every window and door, and opened one path to follow, and then set the house on fire, he would feel "Called" to go in that direction.

3.  Lastly, I generally do not believe in clear cut paths.

I don't think there is a destiny that is pre-mapped out for you, that if you pick the wrong path, then you are doomed forever.

Now obviously, if you pick an evil path, then yeah, that's going to wreck your life. If you start screwing another man's wife, or sleeping around, or join some pagan group to try and destroy Christianity.... right of course that is going to wreck your life.

But when it comes to picking your general path, and what job you choose, I don't think G-d is overly concerned with whether you work at McDonald's or Wendy's, or if you go to college, or do not.

In Psalms 37:23 it says

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.  Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand.

What's the key in that verse?   Steps. You have to take the steps.  If you are good, and upright, and you walk forward, G-d will guide your path.

Have you ever been on a boot that wasn't moving?  What does that rudder do, when the boat isn't moving?  Nothing.

Same with a car.  Ever turn the steering wheel of a car that isn't moving?   Doesn't do anything.   In order to guide the direction of a boat, or a car, it must be moving.   In order for G-d to guide you, you must be moving.

I don't want to be stepping on any ones toes with what a promise from God is. Especially because you took the time to read my lengthy wall of text. There are a couple different instances in the Bible where God made a promise, but fulfilling that promise took years of patience. When I say calling I really referring to a promise from God I was given. My life was very difficult from the beginning. I was adopted to begin with. My birth father tried to claim he was the second coming of Jesus in court. Then the counselor who helped my parents with identifying my disability had some words of warning. My brother was diagnosed with turrets syndrome in close proximity to my diagnosis. I was mute until I was a toddler. The counselors told my mother she will have to fight for my right to learn. I was given an IEP, but I had been bullied for it and even told I was cheating at times. Like my methods of learning such as sketch noting looked like I was cheating when in reality I was sketching the meaning of things on my tests. I was told to stop sketching and pay attention. In reality I was paying attention. 

I also want to point out that things happened in my life that I never could explain unless I looked at the promises that God gave me. There were times it infuriated me because I could not explain some these things don't make a lick of sense. Eventually I gave up and accepted it. These things happen because God has given me a story to write. The more I run away the worst my life gets. Eventually I was in a class to become an electrician. It was like Jona and the whale. My depression got so bad that it was like I was swallowed by a whale. Was not the first time because stupid me did not really go back to my calling. The first time I questioned my existence. The only thing missing was a reason to end it all. God called out to me. It was very different from how my imagination works. I recognize my inner voice. I don't know how to explain it, but I do. God told me that he has everything under control. It took a while to recover the first time, but I did. Now in current time I have no doubt in my mind that my book series was promised to me by God. I can give you several examples from the Bible on similar moments to this. God will not leave or forsake you. He will not be mocked. If he made a promise it will come to pass. 

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End notes

I do hope that you guys notice I am trying to understand your view points. Some how Gods word as a whole does not portray broken promises. I can look up examples. One of them if I remember correctly was a women who was thought to be too old to bare a child. She simply could not believe she was pregnant until it was physically impossible to deny. God made me a promise and to me that is what the real rainbow is about. Its not about pride. Instead its about a promise. Noah was in a big boat for a long time before he saw the Olive leaf. When he did he knew the rain ended and there was dry land out there somewhere. 

[LonerAndy]

15 hours ago, LittlePebble10 said:

I don't want to be stepping on any ones toes with what a promise from God is. Especially because you took the time to read my lengthy wall of text. There are a couple different instances in the Bible where God made a promise, but fulfilling that promise took years of patience. When I say calling I really referring to a promise from God I was given. My life was very difficult from the beginning. I was adopted to begin with. My birth father tried to claim he was the second coming of Jesus in court. Then the counselor who helped my parents with identifying my disability had some words of warning. My brother was diagnosed with turrets syndrome in close proximity to my diagnosis. I was mute until I was a toddler. The counselors told my mother she will have to fight for my right to learn. I was given an IEP, but I had been bullied for it and even told I was cheating at times. Like my methods of learning such as sketch noting looked like I was cheating when in reality I was sketching the meaning of things on my tests. I was told to stop sketching and pay attention. In reality I was paying attention. 

I also want to point out that things happened in my life that I never could explain unless I looked at the promises that God gave me. There were times it infuriated me because I could not explain some these things don't make a lick of sense. Eventually I gave up and accepted it. These things happen because God has given me a story to write. The more I run away the worst my life gets. Eventually I was in a class to become an electrician. It was like Jona and the whale. My depression got so bad that it was like I was swallowed by a whale. Was not the first time because stupid me did not really go back to my calling. The first time I questioned my existence. The only thing missing was a reason to end it all. God called out to me. It was very different from how my imagination works. I recognize my inner voice. I don't know how to explain it, but I do. God told me that he has everything under control. It took a while to recover the first time, but I did. Now in current time I have no doubt in my mind that my book series was promised to me by God. I can give you several examples from the Bible on similar moments to this. God will not leave or forsake you. He will not be mocked. If he made a promise it will come to pass. 

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End notes

I do hope that you guys notice I am trying to understand your view points. Some how Gods word as a whole does not portray broken promises. I can look up examples. One of them if I remember correctly was a women who was thought to be too old to bare a child. She simply could not believe she was pregnant until it was physically impossible to deny. God made me a promise and to me that is what the real rainbow is about. Its not about pride. Instead its about a promise. Noah was in a big boat for a long time before he saw the Olive leaf. When he did he knew the rain ended and there was dry land out there somewhere. 

You don't need to worry about stepping on my toes.  Advice is just that.... advice.  You can deal with it as you please.  If you think the advice is bad, you are under no obligation to follow it, and it won't bother me if you don't.  It's not my life that is affected by you taking or rejecting my advice.

So little about myself.  I was adopted too.  I have no idea who my parents are, and I have requested to not know.  Further, while I lived in a middle class home, my parents simply couldn't understand me, and thus I rarely had any connection other than simply because they were family. 

For example, I was bullied and picked on through my schooling, and had trouble in all matters of education.  I've been betrayed by every single person I ever thought was a 'friend'.  I barely passed high school with a D+ grade point average, and then failed out of college repeatedly.

Neither of my parents could understand this.  Both were very popular, and both were high achievers in school.  My mother got her masters, and my father has a Ph.D.  Both of my parents are to this day, surrounded by friends they have had nearly all their life.

Meanwhile I have no friends, even to this day.

I can remember multiple times growing up, where I would be harmed and hurt by those around me, and when I brought this up with my parents, they would say directly that they simply didn't believe me.   How could they?  They never experienced anything I went through.   It got to the point I learned to never talk to my parents about any of the pain my life, because I knew they would deny it, or say I was imagining it.

This is a trend that continues even to this present day.  Just a year or two ago, I was at a family function, and my mother asked a question about getting hired by a company.  I answered that they did not want me, and would not hire me.  She replied "Oh, I don't believe that!", and I remember thinking to myself... oh right, this is mom.  She never believes anything I say, and replied to her "Yeah, maybe you are right, who knows".  What she didn't know, is that I had already twice applied to the company, and had been specifically rejected twice.

So I am not talking to you, as a person who has it all figured out.  I'm only replying based on the lessons I've learned, in this train wreck that is my life.

My parents constantly told me that G-d was going to bless me.  I heard that for decades.  I'm now 43, still working a low-wage dead end job that I don't like, with no hope for a better future.

Now does that mean G-d can't do anything amazing?  Of course he can, and if G-d willed it to be, I could be CEO of the company if a few years.  I can't imagine how that could possibly work, but all things are possible with G-d.  We know that.

Regardless, what I have learned is that Christian people often say wonderful flowery things, that G-d simply didn't say.  None of the things people said would happen, have ever happened.

Now does any of that mean G-d does not answer prayer?  No.

Of course G-d does answer prayer.  But when you say "I recognize my inner voice", I don't know what that means.  I don't know any Christian anywhere, that said they had an inner voice.   The only time I've heard inner voices, is when I've been on drugs. (by drugs I mean legal drugs, such as when I went to the hospital, and they give me a shot of dilaudid.)

That crazy stuff had me seeing inanimate objects moving, and hearing music that wasn't being played.

But short of that, I have never heard an inner voice.  My father who is the most righteous Christian i know, never heard voices.

Now I have seen clear undeniable direction from G-d.  Have seen clear undeniable answers to prayer.  I know G-d is there, and I know he hears me, and I know he loves all his people.

But... I've never heard the voice of G-d.

If you are saying you know for a fact that you truly heard the voice of G-d himself, then I would encourage you to obey whatever he said, no matter what response you get here.   If he told you to go back to college, then go back to college.  If he told you to stay where you are, then stay where you are.   If he told you to write a book, then write a book.

You don't need to ask us what to do, if G-d himself already gave you directions.  Obey the word of the lord.

In my experience I have never heard a voice of G-d.  And those who claimed I had a calling, none of those callings ever came to be.  Instead, when G-d wants me to move, he moves me.  And when he wants me to stay where I am, he makes that clear as well.

That's just been my experience.

 

Edited October 14, 2020 by LonerAndy