It's happening again not sure what to do

[Figure of eighty]

So part of my refund came and my mom had my brother claim my son though I wanted to do it. When I found out it was too late--already done..

Now I told my mom im just giving my bro 400 bc He claimed my kid even though I didn't want him too and my mother got mad and isn't talking to me and said well pay your own car note (We share the car both our names is on it-- I had he credit score and my old car to trade in and she made more money than me--so we agreed she'd do the note and I'd pay the insurance)

I'm not currently working my son had the cancer scare that lasted 2 months, I lost my job, car got totaled my dad refused to take me to work which led to job loss and refused to take my son down to the hospital except maybe 2 times.

Im currently expecting again (my own fault--i know im due any minute now) I'm really trying to right my wrongs and do it in a way that doesn't burn bridges, like even though my dad didn't take me to work or my son to the hospital I let him use my car and let it go. Im not too made about the job loss anymore-- Also Im trying to move out. 

I'm trying my best to avoid moving with my bf bc i know God doesn't like cohabitation but it's almost like my hand is being forced to move with him. Because as soon as my money came she's asking me to pay this and wants me to give my brother more even though she's giving him most of her money to the point he should have 6k. My mom always does this where she keeps asking and asking until I have nothing left.

I'm trying to move out and this money is what I need-- theyre supposed to get their settlement soon and she told me she'd pay off the car so I'd just have the insurance when I leave but my mom acts weird at times so idk I don't think i can trust it. 

I'm trying to set aside enough so I'll have a car if I need to get one. 

Enough for my apartment's deposit and other things. 

 

I'm trying to move and I feel my mom does litle things to keep me back but I can't deal with this-- the ignoring, name calliing..telling me how to raise my kid but wont do the hard part like stay up with him at night ect  I can't do it...

Im afriad my mom will keep asking until I have nothing left. Im trying not to move in with my bf and just do it alone.

 

The first time so much crap stopped me from moving--cancer scare, car crash, job loss..

 

I'm afraid I'll be blocked again. 

 

Moving shouldn't be this hard Im trying to do the right thing. Idk if God is blocking me from moving to learn a lesson or if this is satan idk bc at this point I feel somehing beyond me is holding me back and I'm about to give up VERY soon.

 

advice?

[Figure of eighty]

Sigh-- My baby threw up again ( Idk if it was bc he was scared of the dogs barking and loud noises or sickness idk) he still has one more hospital visit. 

I'm at the point where If nothing changes and I can't move I'm gonna pray God just take me bc I don't want to be with my parents any longer and something beyond me is stopping me and will not let me progress. Better not to be around.

[teddyv]

Your brother claimed you son as part of what kind of refund? Without knowing more, that sounds like potential fraud.

[Figure of eighty]

2 hours ago, teddyv said:

Your brother claimed you son as part of what kind of refund? Without knowing more, that sounds like potential fraud.

You know taxes? Sorry I usually call it refund.

[The_Patriot21]

thats actually fraud...you can get them thrown in jail for that....

fact of the matter is, judging from this and previous posts you live in a very toxic environment, and nothing is going to change until you stand up for yourself and move out. I would encourage cutting all ties. Assuming of course your description of events is accurate.

[Figure of eighty]

6 hours ago, The_Patriot21 said:

thats actually fraud...you can get them thrown in jail for that....

fact of the matter is, judging from this and previous posts you live in a very toxic environment, and nothing is going to change until you stand up for yourself and move out. I would encourage cutting all ties. Assuming of course your description of events is accurate.

This is true -- this is my life. I wouldn't joke about a 1yr old's cancer scare.  Anyway, I do stand up for myself I certainly don't just take stuff and Ive tried to move before as I stated in my previous post but stuff prevented me from moving out. I'm trying again and I hope this time I prevail.

[LadyKay]

You keep your money. Then get out of there. Let them cry and scream all they want for your money. But don't you dare give it to them.  

[GandalfTheWise]

21 hours ago, Figure of eighty said:

[[EDITED with various lines selected]]

Im currently expecting again (my own fault--i know im due any minute now)

 Also Im trying to move out. 

I'm trying my best to avoid moving with my bf bc i know God doesn't like cohabitation but it's almost like my hand is being forced to move with him.

Im trying not to move in with my bf and just do it alone.

 

If I am understanding this correctly,  you are 9 months along and expecting a second child any time now.    I daresay this has probably affected your parents' attitudes and actions to some degree.

I will be candid with what I recall from the past few years.  In fall of 2018, you joined this site asking about whether or not to move in with your then current boyfriend because your family situation was bad.  You decided not to and that he was not a good person for a future relationship.  The decision was made not to inform him of the pregnancy nor to collect child support because you wanted nothing to do with him.  The next couple years were a rollercoaster of job education, jobs, parents losing their home, everyone living with your brother (with a vague recollection that was next door to your grandmother, aunt, cousins and kids who'd come over uninvited and bother everyone), finances, health issues, and ups and downs with family.   I was often unsure what was an objective account about family and what was frustration and venting.   In about two and half years, the situation has not changed much except that you will soon have two kids to care for.   Overall, you were probably in a better situation to become independent two and a half years ago compared to today.  

What's done is done. It has laid the foundation for the situation today.  The question is what is a reasonable path forward where things have a reasonable chance to change.

I'm assuming your current boyfriend is the father of the expected child and (reading between the lines) has a place of his own and means of support.   I'd have to assume that your current boyfriend is marriage and father material and will play a role in the new child's life and help with finances and child-rearing.  Are there any reasons why marriage is not an option to consider?  

[Figure of eighty]

5 hours ago, LadyKay said:

You keep your money. Then get out of there. Let them cry and scream all they want for your money. But don't you dare give it to them.  

I am. Not giving a dime.

[missmuffet]

You have a lot of issues going on. I will pray for you.