Nervous...

[kwikphilly]

12 hours ago, Figure of eighty said:

Like I stated earlier I AM TRYING. Im applying daily for jobs and going on interview aftIer interview. Im on assistance. I never said shelters were beneath me.. Shelters seem dangerous to me  my only other option would be just moving with my bf. 

Again my focus was on the music in this thread. Not the living situation.

I have no way of knowing if you are trying or not but if you say so then as long as you believe you are doing all you can do to get out then none of us are going to convince you otherwise

Let me try it this way, if someone has an illness/ disease then in order to cure it one must find the cause, addressing the symptoms is not the cure!

 Your living arrangement is the illness, your Dad is the cause-the music is merely a symptom! Youre focusing on the wrong thing..... If what you say is true you should be running for the hills at least for the sake of your kids- wouldnt a shelter be better than where you are at?

Get your head in the game, I know its not easy toting around 2 little ones but theres plenty of help out there even without having a job

With love in Christ, Kwik

 

[kwikphilly]

Also Sister, you say youre getting public assistance- start there, DCF! Ask for an advocate to help you, they can refer you to the right people to look into your options- you can meet with a counselor & if you are worried your Dad will find out they will respect that & keep everything private

Housing may take time but there are temporary placements that you & thr kids could get some Peace... Trust in the Lord & GO with Him..... Make some calls, start with DCF

[kwikphilly]

10 minutes ago, Rosie1jack2pauline3 said:

If only it were that easy!!....FOE...it took me years to get out of an abusive marriage....don’t worry about it, I know you are looking for answers, I did the same through other people...I figured it out all by myself , I was a non believer at the time, I also had a lot of cognitive therapy after I became born again, just the one councillor, she helped me look at things differently, unfortunately some have a habit of telling you what to do, as in people...maybe a Christian councillor will help?

Trust in  God, it will all work out eventually, 🙏

Are you addressing me Sis?, Theres no quote

[kwikphilly]

I understand your position based on your personal experience but its not about an abusive marraige, its about Figure of Eighty. & her issues which we dont really know that much about and we all care about her and make our suggestions , giving advice that we hope & pray will encourage her to step out on her Faith

 I hope she is encouraged by my support as I know plenty of young ladies with small children that were in far worse situations that started the ball rolling with a simple phone call & ended up with successful careers and that Life More Abundant in Christ that they should have

 Never said it was so easy.... But with God all things are possible &it may not be so difficult at all

With love in Christ, Kwik

 

[Solly]

On 5/14/2022 at 8:19 AM, Figure of eighty said:

My dad looked up and played devil worship music loudly at 3a to get under my brother's skin bc hes a minister. 

However, he took my baby in witb him and had him listening to it telling him to let it in .

 

Im worried.  Will prayer keep my son safe? Im really annoyed bc I know what you expose yourself to is a big deal spiritually. 

Depending on which country you are in, I suggest Child Protective Services with a view to get a Protection Order and an Exclusion Zone for you and your infant. If this is a persistent problem then physically act now before something physical happens to your baby such as abduction. 

[Marathoner]

On 5/14/2022 at 12:10 PM, Figure of eighty said:

Like I stated earlier I AM TRYING. Im applying daily for jobs and going on interview after interview. Im on assistance. I never said shelters were beneath me.. Shelters seem dangerous to me  my only other option would be just moving with my bf. 

Again my focus was on the music in this thread. Not the living situation.

Shelters would be dangerous? That's part of what I do at a housing shelter; I look out for the safety and well-being of all. It's my job and I do it well because I serve the Lord. In all that we do, do it unto the Lord.

There are services and programs you may take advantage of, @Figure of eighty. Many. Don't you think I know about these things? How many of our clients come to us with absolutely nothing? Some are convicted felons on probation and parole, and we do everything we can to steer them towards opportunities for employment and housing. 

But who has to actually do the work? I can't force anyone to show up for appointments with professionals who specialize in helping them find work and housing. Oh yes, these services exist across the country. 

Especially for single mothers (or fathers) with children. Especially for them.

There are some who refuse. What happens to them? They go right back to where they were before coming to us. People are not involuntarily placed in our care. We can't force anyone to improve their situation.

@The_Patriot21 didn't mince words. He wasn't mean nor cruel. Who's asking for an excel spreadsheet? Who's accusing you of laziness? No one here, my friend. I'm certainly not. 

You have indeed written that shelters are beneath you; that you don't want to be like people who stay in those places. You can also say that shelters are dangerous as you have done in this topic, but what difference does that make? In the end it's the same thing: you're refusing to avail yourself of alternatives which will remove you and your children from a horrible situation. It's much more than your father listening to devil-worshipping music.

You are being treated evilly where you are. You have communicated this to us all on this forum. Of course I care very deeply about your predicament because if I didn't, I wouldn't devote the time to respond to you, let alone do so honestly. 

I'm not worried about what others think. I concern myself with the welfare of your children and you as well. There are people who can help you, @Figure of eighty. No one can force you to go to them. I continue to pray for you and your children as I always have.

[The_Patriot21]

On 5/14/2022 at 10:29 AM, Figure of eighty said:

I can show you an excel sheet of all the jobs ive applied to and have been rejected from. I went to an interview yesterday. Im looking Im always looking. 

I even got " hired" just for a job to tell me the day before I start work that the position has been filled already. 

So im looking and looking hard. Im even considering hotel living bc of this.  Im trying to move out. I filed for CS. I. Am. Trying.

And i didnt let my dad take him i was sleeping with both kids and I guess my son woke up and he dad took him and I heard the music and my bro and dad getting loud. 

 

And in this particular post I was concerned about the music mainly. Its not like my other posts.

Im not calling you a liar...im just saying you consistently come on here with problem after problem with your parents...and the solution remains the same...stand up to them or move out.

Unfortunately, from the sounds of your family standing up to them will either make things worse or get you kicked out.

The bottom line is this...it is their house, their rules. Unless they have a heart change your best shot is to move out. 

I dont know your local shelters, or how safe or dangerous they are, and from your wording i dont think you do either. I would encourage you to check one out...even if you dont choose to stay at one they often have access to resources to help people in your position, be it contacts for work, low income housing, whatever. 

Fact of the matter is, nothing in your life will change until you do. You need to step up and do something, something more then getting on the internet and asking strangers for help, then refusing to heed any advice given.

Like marathon told you...we cant force you to get help. This isnt the movies, supermans not gonna barge in through the roof and magically fix things for you.

All we can do is pray and offer advice...both of which we are doing.

[Figure of eighty]

On 5/16/2022 at 6:03 PM, The_Patriot21 said:

Im not calling you a liar...im just saying you consistently come on here with problem after problem with your parents...and the solution remains the same...stand up to them or move out.

Unfortunately, from the sounds of your family standing up to them will either make things worse or get you kicked out.

The bottom line is this...it is their house, their rules. Unless they have a heart change your best shot is to move out. 

I dont know your local shelters, or how safe or dangerous they are, and from your wording i dont think you do either. I would encourage you to check one out...even if you dont choose to stay at one they often have access to resources to help people in your position, be it contacts for work, low income housing, whatever. 

Fact of the matter is, nothing in your life will change until you do. You need to step up and do something, something more then getting on the internet and asking strangers for help, then refusing to heed any advice given.

Like marathon told you...we cant force you to get help. This isnt the movies, supermans not gonna barge in through the roof and magically fix things for you.

All we can do is pray and offer advice...both of which we are doing.

This is true. Its their house. Im trying to leave. I have a job that'll prayerfully start in 2 weeks. Im not looking for anyone to save me Im trying to do that myself. Anywho if it comes down to it I'll do hotel living I guess.

[kwikphilly]

1 hour ago, Figure of eighty said:

This is true. Its their house. Im trying to leave. I have a job that'll prayerfully start in 2 weeks. Im not looking for anyone to save me Im trying to do that myself. Anywho if it comes down to it I'll do hotel living I guess.

Bravo!!!!

   Beloved Sister,

Im hoping you've come to realize we ALL truly care about you,pray for you and offer you the advice we believe will help you......it might sound harsh at times but we are honest,tell it like it is and are not looking to soft soap what whatever is necessary to GET YOU OUT OF THERE!LOL

   You have no idea how excited I was to hear you say" If it comes down to it...." YIPPEE,Praise the Lord

   I am praying this job is a given,keep Trusting the LOrd God,Provider ,Shelter,our ROCK and He Will ABSOLUTELY make your Way! Glory to God Most High! Yes,He Always Makes for us THE WAY,its up to us to step out on Faith......

   I will tell you something,many moons ago when I was young & I had a wee child in tow I planned to move but things got screwed up & I had to leave in a hurry from where I was staying....Oh boy,plans right out the window & right when things were going so well! Is it any wonder?lol   Dont ever forget about the enemy trying to mess with your Faith!  Nevermind him though,our GOD is GREATER!

  I went to a hotel,I could afford it but there went my first,last & security I had lined up......staying in that hotel(pretty nice hotel,not cheap) was one of the coolest places I ever lived,no housework,no making breakfast(room service!) ,the pool & other activities for my son(they had a game room & a kids play room near the lobby) And my son just got a big kick out of leaving his toys everywhere & when we got "home" they magically got put away neatly!

   Having no house chores I got to spend quality time with my son when I wasnt at work....I got a second job late nights while my boy slept,hired a hotel employee to babysit and was earning even more money ,I made quite a bit of money & stayed at the hotel for MONTHS just because I was enjoying the lifestyle and t was like a break from reality....So,maybe it might be the break you need after all you have been enduring,just you,baby & Jesus...I hope you have all your heart desires soon enough,Peace,Joy,Safety & God Filled Environment all around you....

                                          With love-in Christ<kwik