No longer sure about it all?

[JED]

Hi Guys,

I haven't been on here for a long time but here goes.

I've been a Christian for maybe 20 years. Married quite young and have 2 children.  Last year unfortunately we separated and divorced. We are both Christians.

I never thought for one second that we would ever not be together, but it seems that we grew apart over the years.  I wanted to keep the marriage together but she said it was not an option and that we would be better separating.  100% no infidelity involved.

The children are great and we are both getting along pretty well most of the time which makes things easier.

Since then I've not attended church very much as this has really affected me.  I'm really unsure about the Christian faith in general now and even wondering if God is even there?  I haven't missed not going to church at all and must admit that I have ventured into some things that as a Christian I shouldn't do.........but life is never black and white and I'm almost at the point in thinking well let's just do what I enjoy as long as no one gets hurt.

I'm a long way from where a Christian should be but trying to wrestle with this all.  I would still say that I live my life in a good way and most people would still say I'm a Christian.

Not sure what anyone can say in this situation really but I would really like some words of wisdom.

 

Edited September 27, 2022 by JED
Clarity

[Justin Adams]

20 minutes ago, JED said:

Not sure what anyone can say in this situation really but I would really like some words of wisdom.

Yeah... been there and nothing made much sense to me either.

I suggest you forget about how you feel and do some deep study. Reading and watching Dr. M. Heiser's "unseen realm" made much come into better focus. There is a lot going on that we should learn about. 

[ayin jade]

Many times David in the bible felt a lack of the Lord's presence yet he knew God was there and continued in his faith. He expressed these thoughts in the book of Psalms.

[kwikphilly]

Blessings JED

Welcome to Worthy,I do hope you will really consider the many replies that will come from your request for advice. .. we don't always agree on small things but this is a big thing and will raise a single concern for all of us

I'm sure there are folks that will say" Yes,he is a Christian" but many don't even know what being a Christian means.  I'm going to go straight to the punch & ask"Do you know what being a Christian means? I mean no disrespect but I don't know you & don't know what you do or do not know- & so I ask.

You spoke about church( the bldg where you go on Sundays) & I'm glad you are still going but that a Christian does not make.But being Born of Spirit does-church won't do that for you but Believing Who Jesus is through your Faith will - by the Grace of God!

The most Intimate,personal,everlasting,unbreakable,loving Relationship you will ever have is the one with God the Father in Christ Jesus-a covenant between a man & a woman could be dissolved but the one with God Cannot

Being religious & following traditions,rules or customs and being a " good" person does not form a Relationship with God- He is Calling,He Lead you here,follow to the foot of the cross and there you will find the Way,the Truth & the Life....Jesus the Christ! Then & only then will a life more Abundant begin my friend

I do hope and pray these words bring you support,encouragement & HOPE in Jesus

With love in Christ, Kwik

 

Edited September 27, 2022 by kwikphilly
typos

[JED]

27 minutes ago, kwikphilly said:

Blessings JED

Welcome to Worthy,I do hope you will really consider the many replies that will come from your request for advice. .. we don't always agree on small things but this is a big thing and will raise a single concern for all of us

I'm sure there are folks that will say" Yes,he is a Christian" but many don't even know what being a Christian means.  I'm going to go straight to the punch & ask"Do you know what being a Christian means? I mean no disrespect but I don't know you & don't know what you do or do not know- & so I ask.

You spoke about church( the bldg where you go on Sundays) & I'm glad you are still going but that a Christian does not make.But being Born of Spirit does-church won't do that for you but Believing Who Jesus is through your Faith will - by the Grace of God!

The most Intimate,personal,everlasting,unbreakable,loving Relationship you will ever have is the one with God the Father in Christ Jesus-a covenant between a man & a woman could be dissolved but the one with God Cannot

Being religious & following traditions,rules or customs and being a " good" person does not form a Relationship with God- He is Calling,He Lead you here,follow to the foot of the cross and there you will find the Way,the Truth & the Life....Jesus the Christ! Then & only then will a life more Abundant begin my friend

I do hope and pray these words bring you support,encouragement & HOPE in Jesus

With love in Christ, Kwik

 

 

I no longer attend church.

Yes I know a Christian is a follower of Jesus. One who believes that Jesus died for our sins and is the only way to Heaven. The rest is probably differences of opinion. 

So in that way, maybe I am no longer a Christian as I'm doubting the fundamentals in all honesty.

I no longer believe that the bible is the infallible word of God for example. That then causes issues for many parts of the Christan faith.

Unless we use the bible as a guide book and not as the 100% truth?

[David1701]

2 hours ago, JED said:

Hi Guys,

I haven't been on here for a long time but here goes.

I've been a Christian for maybe 20 years. Married quite young and have 2 children.  Last year unfortunately we separated and divorced. We are both Christians.

I never thought for one second that we would ever not be together, but it seems that we grew apart over the years.  I wanted to keep the marriage together but she said it was not an option and that we would be better separating.  100% no infidelity involved.

The children are great and we are both getting along pretty well most of the time which makes things easier.

Since then I've not attended church very much as this has really affected me.  I'm really unsure about the Christian faith in general now and even wondering if God is even there?  I haven't missed not going to church at all and must admit that I have ventured into some things that as a Christian I shouldn't do.........but life is never black and white and I'm almost at the point in thinking well let's just do what I enjoy as long as no one gets hurt.

I'm a long way from where a Christian should be but trying to wrestle with this all.  I would still say that I live my life in a good way and most people would still say I'm a Christian.

Not sure what anyone can say in this situation really but I would really like some words of wisdom.

 

2 Cor. 4:14-18 (WEB)

 13 But having the same spirit of faith, according to that which is written, “I believed, and therefore I spoke.” We also believe, and therefore also we speak;
  14 knowing that he who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with Jesus, and will present us with you.
  15 For all things are for your sakes, that the grace, being multiplied through the many, may cause the thanksgiving to abound to the glory of God.
  16 Therefore we don’t faint, but though our outward man is decaying, yet our inward man is renewed day by day.
  17 For our light affliction, which is for the moment, works for us more and more exceedingly an eternal weight of glory;
  18 while we don’t look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.

Rom. 8:28-30 (WEB)

 28  We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose.
  29 For whom he foreknew, he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.
  30 Whom he predestined, those he also called. Whom he called, those he also justified. Whom he justified, those he also glorified. 

---Look away to Jesus, the Author and Finisher of our faith.  He suffered much, and we also suffer.

Being a Christian is about having been born again, by the Holy Spirit, having been given a new heart and spirit that are repentant and believe in the Lord.  If this is you, then you are kept, by the power of God, through faith, unto salvation.  If it is not you, then I would urge you to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ (to trust in him, rely upon him and cling to him, with all your heart, soul, mind and strength), because he is the Way, Truth and Life.  No-one comes to the Father, except through him; and their is no other name given under heaven, by which we must be saved.

Edited September 27, 2022 by David1701

[kwikphilly]

14 minutes ago, JED said:

 

I no longer attend church.

Yes I know a Christian is a follower of Jesus. One who believes that Jesus died for our sins and is the only way to Heaven. The rest is probably differences of opinion. 

So in that way, maybe I am no longer a Christian as I'm doubting the fundamentals in all honesty.

I no longer believe that the bible is the infallible word of God for example. That then causes issues for many parts of the Christan faith.

Unless we use the bible as a guide book and not as the 100% truth?

Blessings JED

Well that's a matter of opinion whether the rest is differences of opinion,lol

On a serious note I want to thank you for replying.Im happy to hear that you say you know Jesus is the Only Way to the Father( oh,you said " Heaven" ,didn't you?) Okay,but you got the jist of it,right?

Actually,only you know for sure- what is troubling to me is that you went on to say" maybe I'm no longer a Christian"...  You see,that just doesnt make sense unless you've been so swept away by all this fear & doubt that you are questioning your Guaranteed Seal of Redemption.....if you don't Believe God's Word is 100percent Truth then of course you'd feel ungrounded,we can only stand firm on Solid Ground,not sinking sand - make sense?

Where you are at right now does not happen overnight so I don't expect you to suddenly be jumping up and down with Great Expectation in a few posts on Worthy.... However,I do Hope you are open to Receive. I really do,I know your position oh too well and I can sympathize- especially because you did not want to end your marriage...very sad.

I also know that His Grace is Sufficient & through horrible ordeals,times of pain & suffering,unfortunate circumstances and some really terrible situations we can still hold in to Peace and Joy in Christ Jesus- because of His Heart & Mind when walking in Spirit & in Truth

It's hard to know what you do believe & what you don't since you consider the Bible as just a guide book- oh & indeed it is only much more as well,it's the Living Word of God

Do you believe their is a devil? Some do not & that's his greatest accomplishment because he is busy at work to cast doubt and tempt the carnal mind.Im not going to tell you to go back to church,I don't know what kind of church you attended but I will suggest you read God's Word.Perhaps you might try thinking that you're reading a personal letter, addressed to YOU!In the same way these printed words are for you only from a real living person..    would you be willing to try?

I only want to help and just want to tell you that our Redeemer Lives,if indeed you are a Born Again Christian then He Will Never leave you nor will He forsake you.... You might have doubts about Him but He Has none about you- Won't you just give it a try,if you seek Him with all of your heart He Will Reveal Himself to you in the

With love in Christ, Kwik

 

 

[JED]

52 minutes ago, kwikphilly said:

 

The reason I say the rest is opinion is that none of us can even guarantee that the words we argue about are even that important in the scheme of things. also we can't even be sure that they were the original words.The bible can't possibly be the infallible word of God as otherwise there would be no errors which there are. I've read the bible for 20 years and have some serious doubts about taking the bible literally. 

I find reading the bible a little boring in honesty. I've always found praying hard work too.

Church meetings also boring.

You are correct in that this hasn't happened overnight. It has been a gradual fade.

I'm really not sure what I believe.

 Do I believe in God, heaven, hell etc.......I'm really not sure anymore.

Whether I had an actual relationship with God at all I'm starting to think maybe not.....

Shocking to me after all these years but I'm not quite ready to dismiss it all yet.

 

 

Edited September 27, 2022 by JED
Clarity

[JED]

56 minutes ago, kwikphilly said:

Blessings JED

Well that's a matter of opinion whether the rest is differences of opinion,lol

On a serious note I want to thank you for replying.Im happy to hear that you say you know Jesus is the Only Way to the Father( oh,you said " Heaven" ,didn't you?) Okay,but you got the jist of it,right?

Actually,only you know for sure- what is troubling to me is that you went on to say" maybe I'm no longer a Christian"...  You see,that just doesnt make sense unless you've been so swept away by all this fear & doubt that you are questioning your Guaranteed Seal of Redemption.....if you don't Believe God's Word is 100percent Truth then of course you'd feel ungrounded,we can only stand firm on Solid Ground,not sinking sand - make sense?

Where you are at right now does not happen overnight so I don't expect you to suddenly be jumping up and down with Great Expectation in a few posts on Worthy.... However,I do Hope you are open to Receive. I really do,I know your position oh too well and I can sympathize- especially because you did not want to end your marriage...very sad.

I also know that His Grace is Sufficient & through horrible ordeals,times of pain & suffering,unfortunate circumstances and some really terrible situations we can still hold in to Peace and Joy in Christ Jesus- because of His Heart & Mind when walking in Spirit & in Truth

It's hard to know what you do believe & what you don't since you consider the Bible as just a guide book- oh & indeed it is only much more as well,it's the Living Word of God

Do you believe their is a devil? Some do not & that's his greatest accomplishment because he is busy at work to cast doubt and tempt the carnal mind.Im not going to tell you to go back to church,I don't know what kind of church you attended but I will suggest you read God's Word.Perhaps you might try thinking that you're reading a personal letter, addressed to YOU!In the same way these printed words are for you only from a real living person..    would you be willing to try?

I only want to help and just want to tell you that our Redeemer Lives,if indeed you are a Born Again Christian then He Will Never leave you nor will He forsake you.... You might have doubts about Him but He Has none about you- Won't you just give it a try,if you seek Him with all of your heart He Will Reveal Himself to you in the

With love in Christ, Kwik

The reason I say the rest is opinion is that none of us can even guarantee that the words we argue about are even that important in the scheme of things. The bible can't possibly be the infallible word of God as otherwise there would be no errors which there are. I've read the bible for 20 years and have some serious doubts about taking the bible literally. 

I find reading the bible a little boring in honesty. I've always found praying hard work too.

Church meetings also boring.

You are correct in that this hasn't happened overnight. It has been a gradual fade.

I'm really not sure what I believe.

 Do I believe in God, heaven, hell etc.......I'm really not sure.

Whether I had an actual relationship with God at all I'm starting to think maybe not.....

 

We used to say in church that people have a God shaped hole in their life......I just dont think that is true.

The UK is becoming more secular and most people are good.  So many people that I know are not religious and are very happy and very good people.  I can now see how one good live a life without God maybe......

[TrueFollowerOfChrist]

4 hours ago, JED said:

Hi Guys,

I haven't been on here for a long time but here goes.

I've been a Christian for maybe 20 years. Married quite young and have 2 children.  Last year unfortunately we separated and divorced. We are both Christians.

I never thought for one second that we would ever not be together, but it seems that we grew apart over the years.  I wanted to keep the marriage together but she said it was not an option and that we would be better separating.  100% no infidelity involved.

The children are great and we are both getting along pretty well most of the time which makes things easier.

Since then I've not attended church very much as this has really affected me.  I'm really unsure about the Christian faith in general now and even wondering if God is even there?  I haven't missed not going to church at all and must admit that I have ventured into some things that as a Christian I shouldn't do.........but life is never black and white and I'm almost at the point in thinking well let's just do what I enjoy as long as no one gets hurt.

I'm a long way from where a Christian should be but trying to wrestle with this all.  I would still say that I live my life in a good way and most people would still say I'm a Christian.

Not sure what anyone can say in this situation really but I would really like some words of wisdom.

 

We all go through dark times in our lives and many of us question our faith.  Be encouraged my friend.  That's totally normal.  The good news is that God is still there.  You might feel you have wandered pretty far from him.  That's OK.  Like the father of the prodigal son,  he waits with arms out ready to run back to you if he sees you coming back to him.  He loves you more than you can imagine and nothing you have done has changed that.  Pray my friend.  Pray and God will answer.  You don't have to try to be good,  just tell God you have strayed and need help.  That is a prayer he has never said no to.  Keep you head up my friend.  You are loved, and as long as there is breath in your lungs,  there is time to make things right.