Romantic Partner

[BK1110]

If it's not too late to add on, just a reminder that the goal of any man/woman relationship is marriage (not life-long boyfriend/girlfriend/partner etc.) and the marriage relationship is described in the Bible with the term "one flesh."

So ask yourself if she is treating you (and you are treating her) with a one flesh mindset. Would she find it acceptable if you were treating her and her goals and pursuit of God's calling in the same way that she is treating yours?

It may be telling that her reasoning for you to stop is not "because I think God is leading you elsewhere" or "because I think God might want you to serve Him in this way more" or something. It seems to be about her fear that you will not meet her needs. It sounds self-focused (all about her), rather than other-focused (both you and God).

[SIC]

On 6/16/2023 at 8:45 AM, BK1110 said:

If it's not too late to add on, just a reminder that the goal of any man/woman relationship is marriage (not life-long boyfriend/girlfriend/partner etc.) and the marriage relationship is described in the Bible with the term "one flesh."

So ask yourself if she is treating you (and you are treating her) with a one flesh mindset. Would she find it acceptable if you were treating her and her goals and pursuit of God's calling in the same way that she is treating yours?

It may be telling that her reasoning for you to stop is not "because I think God is leading you elsewhere" or "because I think God might want you to serve Him in this way more" or something. It seems to be about her fear that you will not meet her needs. It sounds self-focused (all about her), rather than other-focused (both you and God).

Thanks.  Yes . After reflecting on what happened I have come to the conclusion that :

1. She did not approach it from a 'one flesh' mindset. She was envious of me righy from the beginning. 

2. She was self focused in her thinking. 

The good thing is I got to know this now. It would have been much worse of if i had known this 6 months later. 

 

[SIC]

Update:

Right on the first video chat she said she has never been in a relationship.

Much much later I came to know that she has two pictures of a guy with his arm around her and kissing her on the cheek. Apparently the two spent a night together in the same room. But nothing happened. Or atleast that's what she said.

Everyone has a past but after so much has happened, saying 'I have never been in a relationship' is a lie in my book...

There might be many more skeletons in her closet. I dodged a big bullet...

[SIC]

On 7/15/2023 at 4:57 AM, believeinHim said:

 

I don't know her motivation for the comment, and I don't even know the work or star a research scholar would be looking at, 

It's just when you said star, my red flags went up. Good for you for the hotel booking of two rooms, But I think I need more context for what you mean by, 'Star', ? ? 

Well.. become a star means getting citations for your research.. The idea is to pay back the faith and investment the school is putting in on you. 

That's the deal of academia. The school invests money in you hoping that you will do some kind of path breaking research and make a splash in the field. I, who am taking money from them, am supposed to try and conduct as path breaking a research as possible and make as big a splash in the field as possible. If I don't do that I should not be taking money from the school.

 

Edited July 17, 2023 by SIC

[kwikphilly]

Blessings @SIC

Just came by to see how you're doing- not with ex gf,that ship sailed! Lol  But with your research,I would imagine your focus is better with less stress and frustration- being single does have it's benefits

With love in Christ, Kwik

[SIC]

1 hour ago, kwikphilly said:

Blessings @SIC

Just came by to see how you're doing- not with ex gf,that ship sailed! Lol  But with your research,I would imagine your focus is better with less stress and frustration- being single does have it's benefits

With love in Christ, Kwik

Oh yes absolutely @kwikphilly. I have upto 20 hours of free time every week. I intend to stay single for the near future... 

[kwikphilly]

58 minutes ago, SIC said:

Oh yes absolutely @kwikphilly. I have upto 20 hours of free time every week. I intend to stay single for the near future... 

I'm happy for you-I Give Thanks to our Lord that Discernment & Clarity was Given you AND that you made Good decisions..now you have Peace ,God's Will be done.... God Bless you dear Brother

In His Love,Kwik

[SIC]

2 minutes ago, kwikphilly said:

I'm happy for you-I Give Thanks to our Lord that Discernment & Clarity was Given you AND that you made Good decisions..now you have Peace ,God's Will be done.... God Bless you dear Brother

In His Love,Kwik

Thank you so much @kwikphilly

[farouk]

On 6/14/2023 at 7:52 AM, SIC said:

Ok. This is about partner. Not wife. If your girlfriend consistently does not have your back, Should one break up?

Obviously nobody else can answer that question. But I wanted your insight on whether or not it is a problem...

@SIC Thanks for this clarifying information.

Amos 3.3 says: "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"

[kwikphilly]

2 hours ago, SIC said:

Thank you so much @kwikphilly

We go back a ways,always my pleasure❤️