Is it just seeking spiritual advice/counsel/comfort Or gossiping if I tell a few elders/overseers and deacons or an individual belonging to elders/overseers and deacons?

[bartmac123]

Within a Christian church, I’m trying to seek Godly Wisdom when it comes to  venting about somebody else’s bad behavior.

The reason being is that I do Not want to end up gossiping.  However, I would want to vent about somebody else’s bad behavior in order to seek spiritual advice/counsel/comfort.

 

When it become gossipy  then it’s bad but if venting about said problems leads to a better church then it’s ok.

I struggle to know when and when Not to, and how and how Not to do the aforementioned actions.

( Side Note: This just came to me now, but I suppose James 1:19 will shed some light 

Quote

(James 1:19) "....quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger..."

It can be sort of deduced that James 1:19 indicates that we should be careful & cautious about complaining about others which is indicated by the word "slow".  )

 

What biblical scriptures / passages would help us get better discernment & guidance when facing the aforementioned challenges?

Edited August 19, 2023 by bartmac123

[FJK]

Examine yourself first, then examine others.

[Who me]

 

 

2 hours ago, bartmac123 said:

seek Godly Wisdom when it comes to  venting about somebody else’s bad behavior.

Why, does this behaviour affect you or is directed at you  or is merely highly irritating to you?

If it is the later, grit your teeth, pray for them a d your self and keep away from them.

If it directly affects you, speak to them about it, if they do not recognise  there offence or are unwilling to change.

Then speak to your church elders.

Be realistic,  just what do you expect them to do?

All they may be able to do is pray with you, if this behaviour  is a long standing habit, which I'm  sure they will be well aware of.

 

[Who me]

Ha e you read the ' Sacted Diary of Adrian Plass?

It is a story written as a diary about an ineffectual  Christian as he struggles to live as a Christian and love other Christians, including some unloved people.

One of them is an alcoholic,  he struggles to help this man.

The book ends with some moving, realistic lines.

"He was looking at his problem and his solution" as they celebrated the Lords supper.

 

Your brother/sister may well be a nuisance,  but they may also need your love, support, help and prayers. 

[believeinHim]

On 8/19/2023 at 8:19 AM, FJK said:

Examine yourself first, then examine others.

Agreed. Always examine yourself first, then examine others.

Edited August 21, 2023 by believeinHim

[believeinHim]

On 8/19/2023 at 11:01 AM, Who me said:

 

 

Why, does this behaviour affect you or is directed at you  or is merely highly irritating to you?

If it is the later, grit your teeth, pray for them a d your self and keep away from them.

If it directly affects you, speak to them about it, if they do not recognise  there offence or are unwilling to change.

Then speak to your church elders.

Be realistic,  just what do you expect them to do?

All they may be able to do is pray with you, if this behaviour  is a long standing habit, which I'm  sure they will be well aware of.

 

Agreed, as well. I have and come from a very unique perspective. I am a Millennial, Technically mixed race, Christian, straight woman, With a Serious Mental Illness, and Psychotic Disorder ~ Disability. And I often times miscommunicate a lot of different things. There is a ton of miscommunication when typing to me. And vice versa. 

Edited August 21, 2023 by believeinHim

[believeinHim]

Thanks for posting this. I have a trigger happy finger when it comes to the keyboard, And often times forget and don't take the internet seriously. I grew up with a landline telephone still, And to me it is far more jarring to have someone show up at your doorstep, Or call you on the telephone that it is to read text on a computer screen. It's just completely different to me, Honestly, And I don't understand otherwise. 

I have also wondered this, As I type so fast, Yet still don't know how to paragraph or sentence virtually anything. I noticed on a nother Christian message board, That has a place for people with Mental Illnesses, I noticed a lot of different people struggling with similar illnesses typed exactly the way that I do.

They have since stopped allowing people to post in there. It was very upsetting for me, Because it gave me a Christian place to go to talk to other people experiencing and suffering from similar symptoms and disabilities such as mine. It was very upsetting for me when they stopped allowing people to post in there. I noticed on this same message board, That most other people diagnosed with similar illnesses as to mine type in the exact same way. It was very upsetting. 

[Who me]

May I suggest typing your post in something like word so you can use spell check etc before posting.

It is a frustratingly  slow way of posting, otherwise, take a breath before hitting ' post ' and rereading the post.

[Neighbor]

On 8/19/2023 at 11:05 AM, bartmac123 said:

Within a Christian church, I’m trying to seek Godly Wisdom when it comes to  venting about somebody else’s bad behavior.

The reason being is that I do Not want to end up gossiping.  However, I would want to vent about somebody else’s bad behavior in order to seek spiritual advice/counsel/comfort.

 

When it become gossipy  then it’s bad but if venting about said problems leads to a better church then it’s ok.

I struggle to know when and when Not to, and how and how Not to do the aforementioned actions.

( Side Note: This just came to me now, but I suppose James 1:19 will shed some light 

It can be sort of deduced that James 1:19 indicates that we should be careful & cautious about complaining about others which is indicated by the word "slow".  )

 

What biblical scriptures / passages would help us get better discernment & guidance when facing the aforementioned challenges?

Hi, My own suggestion for you is that before you do anything else regarding this matter that you read, pray over, and think upon, the message to placed for you that  is contained within Matthew 18. For it is there you will find rather specific guidance or the ares of concern you have asked about.