is sex a sin

[delilah]

is it bad 2 think about havng sex at a young age?i think about it sometimes and then i stop cuz at first i think of the good things that come out of it ten i think about the bad and i just cant decide...some one plz respond so hat way there i can rest assured tha i am not going against god or his wishes and rules

[KatieK]

Oh delilah. Please tell me you didn't already do it! gosh girl I bet you didn't want me to see this but i did. The Bible says no sex out of marriage. It's a gift te Married people. at our age it's also dangerous medically speacking. don't do it!

Love ya,

Kaite

[delilah]

no katie i didnt i was just asking so that when i do i know its alright

[KatieK]

Oh thank God! (really) my heart rate can return to normal. A few more things to think on. How would it fell to look your husband in the face and name off all the other guys you've had sex with? not exactly comfortable. How cool would it be to know that both of you have saved yourselves for each other? Note that the divorce rate is alot higher in couples who have had sex before marriage especially so young and not with the person they married. No sex outside marrige is in the 10 commandments and in Leviticus 19 or 20 or something there are some more detailed rules which are kind of funny to read. they actually had to be told not to do that. lol. It should be enough in any case that God said so for whatever reason and we as His followers need to do what He says.

-Katie

[nebula]

Frankly, it's hard not to think about sex when our society is so saturated with - in music, in movies and TV, in conversation, in dress, . . . .

I don't know how young you are, but when you go through puberty, your body is maturing its reproductive system - hormones and all. So, it's natural for the desires and feelings to be there.

The imortant thing is to learn how to control the thoughts and urges rather than letting them control you. It's hard in our society, but the less exposure you have to visuals and such, the better. Don't visualize yourself with someone else in that way - this is very important! When you catch yourself in these thoughts, don't beat yourself up BUT make the effort to divert your attention to something else ASAP. Dwelling on these kinds of thoughts lead you towards temptation and weaken your resistances to giving into the temptation.

Sex outside of marriage is a sin. Keep that in mind always. Do what you can to avoid falling into the temptation to give into the urges and desires. I know even the thoughts make you feel good - that's the hormones reacting the way they are supposed to react. But these urges belong to your husband alone - the man who committed his life to you. Try to keep that in mind always as well. What better gift can you give to the man who said, "I do," to you than that he's the only one you have shared yourself with?

Does that help?

[Smalcald]

It is normal to think about sex. God created us with a desire to have sex; it is one of the things, which bond a man and a women together in marriage as Christ Himself stated.

So the problem is a very real one that delila brings up, because we know that although we think about sex from time to time, or all of the time, we as Christians are to save sex for marriage and someone that we love in marriage. Having sex outside of that context is sin. I think the key is not totally focusing on these thoughts, something comes into your mind that is sexual, okay that is fine, but then move on. I think a person can drive himself or herself crazy continually trying to banish all sexual thoughts from our heads.

I don't think the thought itself of sexual desire is sin, I think dwelling on it and continually thinking about sex is lust and that then becomes sin. I think that there is actually quite a bit written about it in Christian literature.

[mikado5001]

I don't think the thought itself of sexual desire is sin, I think dwelling on it and continually thinking about sex is lust and that then becomes sin. I think that there is actually quite a bit written about it in Christian literature.

This point I agree with. The Desire for sex is normal. The obsession with it, and the inability to cope with these desires, is the killer. Sex is a normal, lovely, experience. With another person, THE RIGHT PERSON,(and to all those who think I am hopelessly romantic. THere is a right man for every woman and vice versa) it is an experience to be treasured and cherished. The reason why, I think, that sex is so prevelant and dealt with non-chalantly. Is because of the fact that there are so many factors in play to hinder the spiritual aspects of it. Aids, pregnancy, love issues. You name it. All of those take away from the true meaning, and nature of sex. Sex is so much more than pro-creation. Oh SO MUCH MORE. It is the completion. The completion of a union. The union born of the dis-union of Adam having his rib taken from him to make Eve. Since than I believe that the male has been looking to complete things. And the fulfillment of this union, on both the spiritual and physical plains, is blocked by the very things mentioned above. That also leads to the constant need to have sex. To keep filling up the water, so to speak. But when the time is right for you. And all anxieties are put aside. And you are with the one you love. Sex will be trascended and transformed. Transformed into LOVE. And when sex becomes LOVE. You'll know it. For you will never need to look for sex again.

In closing. DO NOT!!! I REPEAT DO NOT HAVE SEX!!! Wait on the LORD to bring the right man to you. And transform sex into LOVE. And let no one convince you otherwise.

Just my two cent's.

[Khristeeanos]

My lovely bride was still pure when we married. She was 24 years old.

I have such respect for someone like her who refuses to compromise who she is.

And please remember this:

If a man wishes to have sex with you outside of wedlock, he is more likely to have sex with someone else outside of wedlock (adultery).

You need a strong Christian man who loves, admires and respects his wife - and her purity.

[kittylover0991]

Hey delilah,

This is some great advice that you have been given and I remember coming on here maybe a year or so ago asking questions around the same kind dealing with the thought life. Oh delilah, we know where you are coming from.. thinking about guys and everything that can possibly done with a guy... It is definitly natural to desire that, as said before, because God gave us that desire. It says in Genesis that Eve's desire would be to her husband.

However, the bible says that lusting.. strong desiring... is wrong... We need to be guarding our hearts and minds against such stuff. I know, it it most definitly harder than it sounds but we just need to keep working at it. It is best to make a commitment at a young age.. in your early teens or a little before that one is going to stay pure for their future husband or wife and then to stick to that. If one makes that commitment, it is going to be tought, but it makes it easier when something or someone comes along and you can look back at that commitement and have a reason to say no... preserving yourself for your husband. Not to mention, you get married someday to that perfect guy... you can look back at that and be happy that you kept it and kept yourself pure for your husband.

I heard this story one time of a girl at a Christian school who was always being teased because she was a virgin. However, one day she finally said, "I can always be like you, but you can never be like me." They never got onto her about it again. Purity is a precious thing because you only have it once. It can easily be lost in just a moment so guard it close Once gone, it can never be gotten back and it only leaves a world of pain, regret, and hurt.

I can't really say much other than to give you a verse that may help. As many others, I am sure, I struggled and struggle really bad when it comes to my thought life. I got tired of everyone always telling me what I should think about, what I shouldnt', and what hte consequences of thinking like that were. However, no one ever seemed to tell me how to deal with those thoughts that could come at any time of the day for whatever reason... my old sunday school teacher gave me this verse and told me that whenever I think about something that I shouldn't, just say this verse. Hope it helps

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight, Oh Lord, My strenth and my redeemer." Psalm 19:14

One more thing, dont worry about it! It will be alright! God is in control!

With sisterly love in Christ Jesus,

Crystal

[hebrews_beauty]

It is normal to think about sex. God created us with a desire to have sex; it is one of the things, which bond a man and a women together in marriage as Christ Himself stated.

So the problem is a very real one that delila brings up, because we know that although we think about sex from time to time, or all of the time, we as Christians are to save sex for marriage and someone that we love in marriage. Having sex outside of that context is sin. I think the key is not totally focusing on these thoughts, something comes into your mind that is sexual, okay that is fine, but then move on. I think a person can drive himself or herself crazy continually trying to banish all sexual thoughts from our heads.

I don't think the thought itself of sexual desire is sin, I think dwelling on it and continually thinking about sex is lust and that then becomes sin. I think that there is actually quite a bit written about it in Christian literature.

I'd have to say this is the response I agree with the most.