Where are the real men?

[buckthesystem]

Hey you guys, thanks for all your interesting responses. Much of what has been written has confirmed some things I have been wondering about for a long time. First, to Buck and the others who warned me not to drop my standards; don't worry, I won't. I may be looking for Mr Right, but I am not so desperate as to settle for Mr Goodenough. Second, I love children but I can't have any of my own, so that kind of baggage is actually OK with me. By baggage I think I was meaning psychological baggage from a previous marriage. Although...the whole teenager thing....don't think I am ready for instant teenagers!

Now, some of your observations deserve comment.

Ray, you are funny and sincere, but your comment: Finding themselves mean midlife crisis at 30 something if there still single its normal is what I would like you elaborate on. I frankly don't buy the whole "midlife crisis" thing, but I may be thinking of something different. I would like to know what you mean by that. Let me give you clue, though Ray, those magazines are dead wrong, and Will and Grace is so far from reality it's shameful; women to NOT want to married to another woman (that is, a man who behaves like a woman). And, why are you reading women's magazines?

Rustyangel and Chica, your "advice" on marrying an older man is exactly what my dad says. I know there is some merit to that, and really, age is not really a factor for me. I often joke about being too much woman for one man to handle, but the truth is I have always had a real admiration for men (and just people in general) who are determined and thoughtful, ambitious, goal-oriented, successful in life and mature. Maturity is not necessarily related to age, but often it is, and it seems to me that men in their 40's have more of those inner qualities.

Ronald, you are special guy with a tough row to hoe, but you always make me smile. Any man who thinks Barney Fife is a man's man is, dare I say, a real catch! You are wise to have your mom's help with your kids; she did a fine job with her son. Your observations on the sexual side of marriage is dead on, as well. Not only are you funny and self deprecating, but you are also wise and practical. I'm tempted to say, "Meet me at the Three Bells Wedding Chapel" in Vegas, but it's my turn to offer some advice: You need to be single for a while, maybe a year or more. But, I will make bargain with you: You pray for me, I will pray for you and the Lord will deliver what we both need. And, oh yeah, when are you gonna update your blog?

Reconditioned, I don't know your story, you likely don't know mine, but it sounds like we have both been hurt, albeit in different ways. You are right, the Lord is all any of us really need. But, I don't know about you, there are times when I need a hand to hold mine. As I grow, and in particular as the Lord continues to restore my mind and emotions, I am coming to the realization that when G-d said, "It is not good for man to be alone," He wasn't just referring to Adam.

Anitarose, I don't even want to go where you've been! G-d bless your heart!

Child of I am, your comments spoke the most to me, and it's not because you said this: I don't think that I'm telling you anything that you don't already know. You seem to have an understanding of the problem I, and apparently other single women are having today. This comment spoke volumes: don't forget she's to bring in the extra bacon too, as well as raise the children. I see this a lot, even in the church. Husband and wife both working, yet the wife is a provider, a cleaner, a babysitter, etc. I was brought up to believe that the woman raises the kids, and man provides. I refuse to believe that it takes two incomes to survive in America. I am living proof it takes one. And if I can do it, given what some would consider my limitations, any man can, as well.

Again, to all of you, thank you for your responses. This has been a fascinating discussion for me. It's great to be a part of the family G-d, where we can disagree on a variety of issues, but then come together like this and help each other out with the real issues of life.

Excellent! So "in about a year" we will hear of you and Ronald marrying in "the 3 bells wedding chapel" (I hear they give free tickets to the "monster truck show" with every wedding).

Be sure to take lots of pictures and post them on this site. It will be really uplifting.

How about NZ for a honeymoon? You could see what the "civilised world" is like (where you don't have to be fingerprinted to legally drive {had to get that one in} - not that anyone here "obeys the rules" anyway - eric, bolts, Natt - confirm).

And who says "internet courtships" don't work?

[RGR]

[Guest lnj]

*manners, politeness, and all those old-fashioned gentlemanly qualities seem to end with men in their late 40's

You must live up north. What you need to do is come to Tx.

You sure? I met a Texan guy in Australia in the late 80's and he told me he was Canadian...Stupid me believed him!! LNJ

[Marnie]

You sure? I met a Texan guy in Australia in the late 80's and he told me he was Canadian...Stupid me believed him!! LNJ

The accents are different, you know, eh?

[Marnie]

Excellent! So "in about a year" we will hear of you and Ronald marrying in "the 3 bells wedding chapel" (I hear they give free tickets to the "monster truck show" with every wedding).

Be sure to take lots of pictures and post them on this site. It will be really uplifting.

How about NZ for a honeymoon? You could see what the "civilised world" is like (where you don't have to be fingerprinted to legally drive {had to get that one in} - not that anyone here "obeys the rules" anyway - eric, bolts, Natt - confirm).

And who says "internet courtships" don't work?

Whoa nelly! That's putting the horse before the cart! I need to check his credit rating, first.

[Marnie]

Excellent! So "in about a year" we will hear of you and Ronald marrying in "the 3 bells wedding chapel" (I hear they give free tickets to the "monster truck show" with every wedding).

Be sure to take lots of pictures and post them on this site. It will be really uplifting.

How about NZ for a honeymoon? You could see what the "civilised world" is like (where you don't have to be fingerprinted to legally drive {had to get that one in} - not that anyone here "obeys the rules" anyway - eric, bolts, Natt - confirm).

And who says "internet courtships" don't work?

Whoa nelly! That's putting the horse before the cart! I need to check his credit rating, first.

Okay, that was a typo and NOT a Freudian slip. It's "the cart before the horse."

[RGR]

Hey you guys, thanks for all your interesting responses. Much of what has been written has confirmed some things I have been wondering about for a long time. First, to Buck and the others who warned me not to drop my standards; don't worry, I won't. I may be looking for Mr Right, but I am not so desperate as to settle for Mr Goodenough. Second, I love children but I can't have any of my own, so that kind of baggage is actually OK with me. By baggage I think I was meaning psychological baggage from a previous marriage. Although...the whole teenager thing....don't think I am ready for instant teenagers!

Now, some of your observations deserve comment.

Ray, you are funny and sincere, but your comment: Finding themselves mean midlife crisis at 30 something if there still single its normal is what I would like you elaborate on. I frankly don't buy the whole "midlife crisis" thing, but I may be thinking of something different. I would like to know what you mean by that. Let me give you clue, though Ray, those magazines are dead wrong, and Will and Grace is so far from reality it's shameful; women to NOT want to married to another woman (that is, a man who behaves like a woman). And, why are you reading women's magazines?

Rustyangel and Chica, your "advice" on marrying an older man is exactly what my dad says. I know there is some merit to that, and really, age is not really a factor for me. I often joke about being too much woman for one man to handle, but the truth is I have always had a real admiration for men (and just people in general) who are determined and thoughtful, ambitious, goal-oriented, successful in life and mature. Maturity is not necessarily related to age, but often it is, and it seems to me that men in their 40's have more of those inner qualities.

Ronald, you are special guy with a tough row to hoe, but you always make me smile. Any man who thinks Barney Fife is a man's man is, dare I say, a real catch! You are wise to have your mom's help with your kids; she did a fine job with her son. Your observations on the sexual side of marriage is dead on, as well. Not only are you funny and self deprecating, but you are also wise and practical. I'm tempted to say, "Meet me at the Three Bells Wedding Chapel" in Vegas, but it's my turn to offer some advice: You need to be single for a while, maybe a year or more. But, I will make bargain with you: You pray for me, I will pray for you and the Lord will deliver what we both need. And, oh yeah, when are you gonna update your blog?

Reconditioned, I don't know your story, you likely don't know mine, but it sounds like we have both been hurt, albeit in different ways. You are right, the Lord is all any of us really need. But, I don't know about you, there are times when I need a hand to hold mine. As I grow, and in particular as the Lord continues to restore my mind and emotions, I am coming to the realization that when G-d said, "It is not good for man to be alone," He wasn't just referring to Adam.

Anitarose, I don't even want to go where you've been! G-d bless your heart!

Child of I am, your comments spoke the most to me, and it's not because you said this: I don't think that I'm telling you anything that you don't already know. You seem to have an understanding of the problem I, and apparently other single women are having today. This comment spoke volumes: don't forget she's to bring in the extra bacon too, as well as raise the children. I see this a lot, even in the church. Husband and wife both working, yet the wife is a provider, a cleaner, a babysitter, etc. I was brought up to believe that the woman raises the kids, and man provides. I refuse to believe that it takes two incomes to survive in America. I am living proof it takes one. And if I can do it, given what some would consider my limitations, any man can, as well.

Again, to all of you, thank you for your responses. This has been a fascinating discussion for me. It's great to be a part of the family G-d, where we can disagree on a variety of issues, but then come together like this and help each other out with the real issues of life.

Excellent! So "in about a year" we will hear of you and Ronald marrying in "the 3 bells wedding chapel" (I hear they give free tickets to the "monster truck show" with every wedding).

Be sure to take lots of pictures and post them on this site. It will be really uplifting.

How about NZ for a honeymoon? You could see what the "civilised world" is like (where you don't have to be fingerprinted to legally drive {had to get that one in} - not that anyone here "obeys the rules" anyway - eric, bolts, Natt - confirm).

And who says "internet courtships" don't work?

Just for you buckthesystem!!!!

[RGR]

Excellent! So "in about a year" we will hear of you and Ronald marrying in "the 3 bells wedding chapel" (I hear they give free tickets to the "monster truck show" with every wedding).

Be sure to take lots of pictures and post them on this site. It will be really uplifting.

How about NZ for a honeymoon? You could see what the "civilised world" is like (where you don't have to be fingerprinted to legally drive {had to get that one in} - not that anyone here "obeys the rules" anyway - eric, bolts, Natt - confirm).

And who says "internet courtships" don't work?

Whoa nelly! That's putting the horse before the cart! I need to check his credit rating, first.

Improving by the minute, lol!

[nebula]

Just for you buckthesystem!!!!

Pie wars!

(For those that don't kow - we used to "throw pies" at each other a lot when we had the ability to post images.)

[RGR]

Just for you buckthesystem!!!!

Pie wars!

(For those that don't kow - we used to "throw pies" at each other a lot when we had the ability to post images.)