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Posted

Sure it has merit for some girls, but not all and not the majority.

If you want to date Paris Hilton type, yes you shouldn't be a nice guy, but who wants to date Paris Hilton type (as if she would care about us anyway!)? Sure on the surface this kind of women looks good, but what is she, an empty shell, she would and will make any man totally miserable.

Women who are attracted to jerks have basic self esteem problems; I think we just notice some of these women who are attracted to the jerks, and miss out on the real gems that actually know what it means to love somebody for who they really are as a human being and do want a nice guy.

I think you are just going through a rough patch here, it happens to all guys when they are single. I sometimes felt the same way until I met my wife and that was 21 years ago.

I will say that you are on to something with confidence though, it does make a difference. I think you can have confidence without being a jerk though.

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Posted

all women and girls are pretty in many different ways. You would be really surprised at how attractive someone can become the longer you know them and start to see them for who they really are. The flip side of course is how ugly some of those pretty girls who don't like nice guys really are when you see them on the inside.

Peace.

Don't I know it. They're still mysterious and have those womanly ways that I wish I could marry.

But they're all "just friends" and they marry jerks who order them around, then whine to me about it because they know I will listen. I cut most of them off because I just can't take it anymore.

Yikes. Now that's uncharitable! :wub:


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Posted

I'd have to wonder why you assume how they want to be treated? Like what do you think is 'nice guy' treatment? Old-fashioned treatment?

The reason women like jerks instead of nice guys is the issue here.

K. I think at this point we have different perceptions of what is 'nise' and especialy since it hasn't been established. But I will continue with seeing this from your perspective.

The theory is basically this:

Jerks come off as having confidence, so a woman will naturally see him as being a protector and be drawn to him.

Yes, immature jerks do that. I don't know why she would? Does she have a brain?

Nice guys who put women on a pedestal and never dare to disagree with them just seem like wimps.

Communication is two way. :wub:

So they fall into the "just friends" category, all the while believing that they stand out as husband material among all the jerks the woman knows.

Yes, such nieve ones fall for games!

I didn't know any of this until recently and was in denial of it for awhile, but it has merit.

It absolutely does have merit! :wub:


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Posted

all women and girls are pretty in many different ways. You would be really surprised at how attractive someone can become the longer you know them and start to see them for who they really are. The flip side of course is how ugly some of those pretty girls who don't like nice guys really are when you see them on the inside.

Peace.

Don't I know it. They're still mysterious and have those womanly ways that I wish I could marry.

But they're all "just friends" and they marry jerks who order them around, then whine to me about it because they know I will listen. I cut most of them off because I just can't take it anymore.

Good for you! :wub::wub::wub:

Smalcald:But dude, .

Yeah, be nice!


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Posted

What do i think of women?

Their soft, cuddly, squishy, warm, sometimes they even cook for you!!!

Though I lost two rounds at the marraige thing, I found a woman i love. All ya have to do is listen to them, and write them a poem. :wub:

Something like....

Why my love are you speechless

your hearts song is all that need speak to mine

which is just a heart of clay

to be molded by your love

into the man that you desire

Do I see surrender in thine eyes?

Then so be it

i shall take you into my arms

pull thee close to my heart

and protect thy love with all that I am

My love, the heavens will cease to exist

the sun will shine no more

the oceans will dry

and the stars will cry long b'fore

my love or I e'er turn from thee

I take thy heart,

place it inside,

where my heart resides

I give my heart to you to hold

to cherish the rest of your life.

come with me my love

lets journey on a new adventure in life

let us meet each day with great abandon

to the cares that may be thrown our way.

For our love together is a formidible force

that will grow and grow forever

You ask what does love feel like?

Love is an excitement

yet a peace and quiet within my soul

An acheing in my body

a desire so strong

Like being constantly beckoned.

It is like a rope around your heart being pulled

a quivering within

its a shout, a sigh, a leap from a cliff,

And all three combined.

exhilerating, yet a stillness too.

a quiet voice speaking from each heart to heart a whisper

A peace that says I'm here for you. I'll always be here.

a small breeze to flame the passion from within

My love i will love you for eternity

nay my love eternity is not long enough

Beyond eternity for eternity is but a brief flicker of time.

For I would rather have a brief flicker in time with you

than never to have been loved by you at all.


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Posted

Beautiful poem.

You guys really are smart and good to talk to.


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Posted
Beautiful poem.

You guys really are smart and good to talk to.

You know, that reminds me of something. I have this pet peeve; I cannot stand it when men jokingly refer to their wives as "my old lady" or "the old ball and chain." I know these subtle put downs are usually not meant to hurt your wives's feelings, but you have no idea how it often does. I know your wife may laugh it off, but these kinds of things car wear a person down. Instead of tearing her down, try building her up. Maybe one of the reasons why our wives come across as "cranky" or hard to live with is the way treat her by the way we talk to her.

And, by the way, what's wrong with putting my wife up on a pedestal? The better I treat her, the better I get treated. :th_praying:


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Posted

Beautiful poem.

You guys really are smart and good to talk to.

You know, that reminds me of something. I have this pet peeve; I cannot stand it when men jokingly refer to their wives as "my old lady" or "the old ball and chain." I know these subtle put downs are usually not meant to hurt your wives's feelings, but you have no idea how it often does. I know your wife may laugh it off, but these kinds of things car wear a person down. Instead of tearing her down, try building her up. Maybe one of the reasons why our wives come across as "cranky" or hard to live with is the way treat her by the way we talk to her.

And, by the way, what's wrong with putting my wife up on a pedestal? The better I treat her, the better I get treated. :th_praying:

Theres nothing wrong with that. I know one problem is when one marries someone that their not in love with, and one that is not their soulmate. You have to have at least one, preferrably both.


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Posted
i was always a nice guy but i got tired of gettin overlooked so i switched over to bein a bad boy.

Yeah? How's that workin' for you? :th_praying:


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Posted

You know I need to respond more strongly to something that was said earlier, which has since been deleted for good reason.

That attitude of looking at another human being as an object, in the way that those phrases used does, this attitude is one of the biggest problems that I have seen men have. Women are children of God with eternal souls, many of which are standing at the heavenly alter today looking at us. For us to stand here and refer to them because of their outward body type in that derogatory way, shows almost the essence of an un-Christ like attitude toward all human beings and women in particular.

Sorry I didn't mean to derail this or to pick out one poster, because he did have some points, but I really cannot let that comment stand as it goes to the core of some larger and very damaging issues. But I wanted to address it because it is a very common attitude of many men in the world and some Christian men unfortunately and must be addressed.

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