Family Out of Order

[firehill]

One other note I wanted to make. The only way to know for sure the menaing of kephale in the bible is to look at how the bible defines it in each given context. We can be sure what it means if we draw the menaing from the text itself.

[exrockstar]

well here is a general question.

does everyone atleast agree that a man and woman play different roles in a family?

does everyone agree that they are expected to do certain things as a male and female in a family?

just want to step out of this "rule over" concept for a second.

My answer would depend on what you mean exactly. Besides I don't see family members as having anything to do with 'role play'. There is no law in the bible that says who does what. It's up to the partners. Male and female are more similar than they are different therefore 'roles' can interchange.

pretty much answers why you think the things you do.

i dont mean that in a bad way.

my feeling are this....you and your husband are going to be happy only as long as you both view scriptures the same way.

[Openly Curious]

well here is a general question.

does everyone atleast agree that a man and woman play different roles in a family?

does everyone agree that they are expected to do certain things as a male and female in a family?

just want to step out of this "rule over" concept for a second.

As for me I know that men and women play different roles in the family. The very fact the scriptures make these roles apparent by using the words "husband" and "wife" then you have the terms "fathers" and "mothers" and then teaches things that pertain to each one seperately. As also the bible speaks concerning "males" and "females" and all of these roles are relating to only males or to the females roles. A husband, a father, a male are only related to male the same is true for a female, a wife or a mother only pertains to woman.

The "rule over" concept is blown so much out of proportion that the simple truths are over looked in the word regarding this subject. The simplicity of the gospel it there but some don't want to accept it.

But I know for a certainty that men and womens roles are different in a family.

OC

[OopsMartin]

well here is a general question.

does everyone atleast agree that a man and woman play different roles in a family?

does everyone agree that they are expected to do certain things as a male and female in a family?

just want to step out of this "rule over" concept for a second.

The term "roles" and "role play" came from the French and had to do with acting in a play. So I don't much care for the term or the strict square hole pegging that comes with it. With that aside, yes. Husbands and wives tend toward a very loose generalization of job divisions in marriage. But one size doesn't fit all. some guys hate to work on cars and some women aren't much at cooking.

And then there are men who put their spices in alphabetical order. Knew a guy like that. Sorry to say I just couldn't stand him.

[exrockstar]

But one size doesn't fit all. some guys hate to work on cars and some women aren't much at cooking.

i was looking at it more like raising a family.

if a man is about washing dishes while the woman mows the yard then more power to them.

some times it's not even about the bible....some just see this as being a gentleman.

one doesn't have to be Christian to be a gentleman.

[Emily~Anne]

But one size doesn't fit all. some guys hate to work on cars and some women aren't much at cooking.

i was looking at it more like raising a family.

if a man is about washing dishes while the woman mows the yard then more power to them.

some times it's not even about the bible....some just see this as being a gentleman.

one doesn't have to be Christian to be a gentleman.

That's how me and my hubby do it! But, but, but, there is a very good reason for that, my husband is a paraplegic in a wheelchair, and feels badly that I have to do all the yardwork, so helps out by being in charge of dishes. Our oldest son who is 10 is more and more able to help me with the yardwork now, just not the lawnmower part yet.

Men and women are absolutely designed differently in many areas. Men are stronger. A women would have to work very, very hard to take on a somewhat masculine figure. You know what else? Women's hormones fluctuate more. We are also more nurturing. We are the ones who nurse the babies. And how about our hands? Women generally have hands that have a softer touch. Men have big strong hands. It really does all mesh in very nicely with God's design if you think about it. The authority God gives husbands is a good kind of authority that makes me feel safe and protected.

[OopsMartin]

But one size doesn't fit all. some guys hate to work on cars and some women aren't much at cooking.

i was looking at it more like raising a family.

if a man is about washing dishes while the woman mows the yard then more power to them.

some times it's not even about the bible....some just see this as being a gentleman.

one doesn't have to be Christian to be a gentleman.

That's how me and my hubby do it! But, but, but, there is a very good reason for that, my husband is a paraplegic in a wheelchair, and feels badly that I have to do all the yardwork, so helps out by being in charge of dishes. Our oldest son who is 10 is more and more able to help me with the yardwork now, just not the lawnmower part yet.

Men and women are absolutely designed differently in many areas. Men are stronger. A women would have to work very, very hard to take on a somewhat masculine figure. You know what else? Women's hormones fluctuate more. We are also more nurturing. We are the ones who nurse the babies. And how about our hands? Women generally have hands that have a softer touch. Men have big strong hands. It really does all mesh in very nicely with God's design if you think about it. The authority God gives husbands is a good kind of authority that makes me feel safe and protected.

Nice thoughts E.A. Don't feel bad about mowing the lawn. My sister used to do the yard work in my family. Now as an adult I love to do yard work. It would be silly IMO to try to legislate stuff like that. Although I do think it's a gentlemanly thing for a man to do the tough and dirty work like taking out the garbage.

And you are correct that men are generally stronger than women. It's not just muscles, but our bones are stronger. Even our fat is tougher. I'm a firm believer that God made all differences to help us learn how to give and share. Whatever gifts we have they are for the purpose of using them to help others. We are not strong just for ourselves.

[Openly Curious]

But one size doesn't fit all. some guys hate to work on cars and some women aren't much at cooking.

i was looking at it more like raising a family.

if a man is about washing dishes while the woman mows the yard then more power to them.

some times it's not even about the bible....some just see this as being a gentleman.

one doesn't have to be Christian to be a gentleman.

That's how me and my hubby do it! But, but, but, there is a very good reason for that, my husband is a paraplegic in a wheelchair, and feels badly that I have to do all the yardwork, so helps out by being in charge of dishes. Our oldest son who is 10 is more and more able to help me with the yardwork now, just not the lawnmower part yet.

Men and women are absolutely designed differently in many areas. Men are stronger. A women would have to work very, very hard to take on a somewhat masculine figure. You know what else? Women's hormones fluctuate more. We are also more nurturing. We are the ones who nurse the babies. And how about our hands? Women generally have hands that have a softer touch. Men have big strong hands. It really does all mesh in very nicely with God's design if you think about it. The authority God gives husbands is a good kind of authority that makes me feel safe and protected.

OC

[tsth]

I believe that God very clearly saw a difference between men and women. I also have a sneakin suspicion that if He were to stand before a church crowd today and preach the following, the "claws" would be coming out...and the contentions would begin:

1 Peter 3: Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. 7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

(I wonder why the "weaker" term was even brought up, if not important in meaning and distinction?)

It also seems very clear within Titus that the roles for the wife are CLEARLY defined. (In comparison, I wonder how healthy the family of today would stand up, next to the one in Paul's day?)

Titus 2:1 You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine. 2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance. 3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. 6 Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. 7 In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness 8 and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.

(Seems to me, that it would do our society good, to return to the orderly teachings above. Especially the "self-control" portion....interesting how many times that was mentioned! Another thing that has been lost today, due to lack of order.)

In His Love,

Suzanne

[Openly Curious]

I believe that God very clearly saw a difference between men and women. I also have a sneakin suspicion that if He were to stand before a church crowd today and preach the following, the "claws" would be coming out...and the contentions would begin:

1 Peter 3: Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. 7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

(I wonder why the "weaker" term was even brought up, if not important in meaning and distinction?)

It also seems very clear within Titus that the roles for the wife are CLEARLY defined. (In comparison, I wonder how healthy the family of today would stand up, next to the one in Paul's day?)

Titus 2:1 You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine. 2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance. 3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. 6 Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. 7 In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness 8 and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.

(Seems to me, that it would do our society good, to return to the orderly teachings above. Especially the "self-control" portion....interesting how many times that was mentioned! Another thing that has been lost today, due to lack of order.)

In His Love,

Suzanne

You are spot on in the things you have to say as it was all very much biblical and true to the scriptures

1 Peter 3:6--"Even Sarah obeyed Abraham calling him lord: whose daughters ye are as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement."

Genesis 18:12--"Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?"

OC