When you are the type that seeks approvals from others

[Blien]

What do you do if you struggle with trying to meet everyone's approval? Its something I want to stop but its so hard. Today my boss sent me an email and it appeared to be the kind of 'I'm not pleased with your efforts' kind. Everything I try very hard at my work but this man is just killing my soul. And I tried to tell myself its not him I'm trying to please but it ruined my whole day. I was happy and cheerful when I came in the morning. Right until that email at noon..

Advice? Not on my boss please, just on how to not seek people's approvals. Also I need prayers my friends if you please..

[Guest zoe-girl]

I understand a lot of what you are walking through Blien~

Pray and ask God to help you get to the ' Roots" of why you do this and strive to seek God's approval and NOT man's approval and this will bring much relief~

I love ya and will be praying for you~

[MorningGlory]

I think you must be pretty young, Blein, at least you write like someone young. As you get older you don't seek others' approval nearly as much. But, in the meantime, Zoe is correct....seek the approval of the Lord and He will give you the serenity to weather other people...even a boss.

[vicki-aka-bebe]

hi blien ... been a while since i have talk with u ... good to see u anyway.... maybe u can stop in chat again soon

but as for ur question ... hmm well i think it is part of human nature to want to be liked and to want peoples approval... but what u have to understand is that we are what and who we are and of course we need to try and improve ourselfs to some degree for ourselfs as much at for others... but mostly what we feel about ourselfs is protraited to others.... yes as u get older i think u will not want to impress as much ... but people should like u for who u are ... and those that dont .. it is there problem ... exspecially if you are doing the best u can in this life.... and God is always working on us ... which is good and it will be that way till he comes for us... but seek God on this and pray he can give u a peace as to who u are and lift the burden off u of trying to change to please others.... now i feel as though i am rambling .. so will hush....

God bless and take care.... hope to chat with u soon

also hope all is well with you .... love in Christ ... sister vicki

[Honeybee88]

I recognized this in myself last year, and the only thing I can do is realize that no one will live up to my expectations. No one will like me how I think I ought to be liked; no one will accept me the way I want to be accepted; no one will be pleased with me the way I want them too. We all think too highly of ourselves, and we expect others to live up to how we think they ought to make us feel. It's never gonna happen! All I can do when I find myself wanting attention and approval, recognition and acceptance from others is to just tell God that He is the only one who will suffice. Prayer is the only thing to get through it and not be disappointed or upset.

[Blien]

Some very wise wise words my friends... I've been noticing a great deal with what God has been doing for me at work. This situation is just one of them where he is fathering me to mature and become the man I need to be so that I can work for the expansion of his economy.

I've miss you all too.. thanks so much for the advice, I really appreciate you are a all a God send!

[anitarose]

The only thing I can recommend is the phrase, which is really true in this case:

"God is your source of supply, not your job or your abilities"

1 Tim 3:16 says,

"Study (or work) to show yourself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the Word of Truth".

Why do I quote that?

Because you show your self approved unto God when you submit to your authority, as in Romans 13:1, "Submit therefore yourself to the governing authority".

Keep that in mind when you do your job.

a.

[Big Time]

A Christian must learn to be assertive as Jesus was. Jesus wasn't mean or aggressive or manipulative, but he couldn't be influenced by people who were because he was assertive.

He was merciful and helpful for people in need, but He got up in the face of people who were sanctimonious and just downright nasty. He didn't avoid conflict and didn't care what kind of risk He took to stand up for Himself.

You can confidently assert that your boss was mistaken about your performance without being disrespectful towards him. If your boss overreacts or gets defensive for no reason, take the hint and make plans to move on.

I think you'll find that a lot of authority figures in the workplace are immature and insecure and so they react to everything accordingly. I have found that Jesus' teachings really help you thrive in the workplace.

[artsylady]

Today my boss sent me an email and it appeared to be the kind of 'I'm not pleased with your efforts' kind.

I hope he was more specific than that. If he was, is there any truth to what he was saying? I mean, if he's saying that you're talking too much or something like that, is that something you can work on? Or is he just being nitpicky? All to often the people that are appointed to management have no idea how to manage people.

[Serving God]

You don't need to be worried about pleasing your boss or anyone for that matter, worrying is a sin in itself. People will always be people, what I mean is humanity is sinful, people like to be pleased all the time and demanding too and bossy for that matter, it's all based on selfishness - the me, myself and I disease. People will always make you feel that if you don't meet their expectations then you are not good enough!!!!!! how ironic, who is perfect? none, not one of us. All you need to do is be honest and true to yourself, if people don't like it, then that's their problem and not yours. As long as your heart is clean before God, who has the power to destroy spirit, soul and body, you have nothing else to fear because if God is for you, surely, who in the world can be against you?

So my dear take heart don't let man's foolishness lead you astray. The bible says that your conscience is the Lord's search light, it searches your inmost parts, but make sure when the Lord searches your heart, your heart does not condemn you. Be bold, be strong for the Lord your God is with you.