A better understanding as I see it, regarding all predestination in the Bible, is that it is talking about entire nations (usually, Israel and a different nation):
Esau NEVER served Jacob, but the Edomites were beneath Israel at some point (Jacob and Esau's descendants).
It's hard to see Israel as so blessed, especially in the modern troubled times, but there are some Bible explanations as to why a whole nation of people, including some who trusted God and some who didn't, received special blessings.
Esau wasn't "pre-hated" by God, but his descendants suffered for his lack of vision. Confer with another remark nearby in Romans about jars of clay, commonly taken as individuals and salvation--the reference is Jeremiah 18 and the potter and clay in that passage are about the nation of Israel, not individuals!