Need advice (Warning: heavy topic)

[SemperFidelis07]

You know something, my nieces are here to spend three weeks Christmas vacation with me and my wife. They arrived Saturday. Just seeing their smiles, hearing their laughs, hugging them makes me forget everything that is wrong with the world. This past morning before heading off to work, I went to check on my nieces. Seeing my older niece, Maya, sleeping there peacefully...all I needed wat to see her angelic face and later hear my sister's sarcastic sense of humor from her at dinner and I forget that she wouldn't be here because of that man (in the loosest sense of the word). You know, I'm gonna write out a letter, keep it in a safe place and maybe one day send it. Right now I can only pray that his time in prison will change him for the better. A lot can happen in 35 years. The judge stated that if he was legally able to, he would have sentenced him to life imprisonment but he gave him the harshest possible sentence that the state of South Carolina allowed.

[enoob57]

The hardest thing in the pure economy of The Father, Son and Spirit the least of sins is equal to the greatest of sins as sin has no part with God!

The fact That God says we will be sinners till we are taken out of these bodies- may it cause us to always remember this of His Word

Jn 8:7

7 So when they continued asking Him, He raised Himself up and said to them, "He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first."

NKJV

Jas 2:10-11

10 For whoever shall keep the whole law, and yet stumble in one point, he is guilty of all.

NKJV

Mt 7:2

2 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.

NKJV

I would say from one Marine to another until you can walk on these stones of fire with a pure heart of no

judgment I would keep back the letter from this man! In the day you are able you certainly will be among

the few... Love, your brother, Steven

[SemperFidelis07]

Oohrah, brother.

[Sevenseas]

You know something, my nieces are here to spend three weeks Christmas vacation with me and my wife. They arrived Saturday. Just seeing their smiles, hearing their laughs, hugging them makes me forget everything that is wrong with the world. This past morning before heading off to work, I went to check on my nieces. Seeing my older niece, Maya, sleeping there peacefully...all I needed wat to see her angelic face and later hear my sister's sarcastic sense of humor from her at dinner and I forget that she wouldn't be here because of that man (in the loosest sense of the word). You know, I'm gonna write out a letter, keep it in a safe place and maybe one day send it. Right now I can only pray that his time in prison will change him for the better. A lot can happen in 35 years. The judge stated that if he was legally able to, he would have sentenced him to life imprisonment but he gave him the harshest possible sentence that the state of South Carolina allowed.

I've got some letters in a drawer myself.....glad you find joy with your family...that is how it should be!

[enoob57]

Oohrah, brother.

God's speed to the victory in the real war of flesh and Spirit...

[NeedYouLord]

Whew...Amen...Stephen...And Semper...You have just made my heart leap with Joy!!! Wow...

[B3L13v3R]

Hi SemperFidelis07

Sounds like a tough corner for you and definitely your sister over the past few years.

A few thoughts come to mind.

-Thank God your sister is still alive along with the child! I hope she is the Lord's as well?

-The perp was caught, tried, and thank God doing his time.

So many on this side of life "go free." On those that "go free" on this side of life, that will hardly be the case in the next if they do not repent and believe on the True Lord Jesus Christ.

Rev 20:15 And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire.

-There is a righteous anger, and an ungodly anger.

"If" you in an ungodly way are holding unforgiveness towards the rapist, ask God to give you the strength to forgive him. Early in my walk with Christ, the day of reckoning came for me for those that I still held in deep unforgiveness. A number of them for "good" reasons.

The Lord showed me His Word on the matter:

Mark 11:25-26 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.

-I saw and understood the Truth of the matter, however in my own strength I could not forgive them...

I had not the faith to do so, and yet wanted to "somehow" forgive them to honor my Lord. My faith was lacking.

The Lord showed me a few key verses.

Although the first is in reference to a father desiring his son to be set free from a demonic spirit by Jesus Christ, the Scripture verse can be seen in other applications in our life as well. For me, needing strength to forgive:

Mar 9:24b ...and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.

The second verse that assisted me:

Mar 11:24 Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.

-In understanding the Truth of these verses, I prayed for strength to forgive.

The Lord immediately gave me the strength to forgive a number of people, some of them still alive today that I keep in prayer for their salvation.

As a result, time has given me the opportunity to tell a few of them they are forgiven by me as well, and go on to tell them the Gospel message of our Lord Jesus Christ, letting them know what awaits them without "His" forgiveness.

Quote: SemperFidelis07 : "You know, I'm gonna write out a letter, keep it in a safe place and maybe one day send it. Right now I can only pray that his time in prison will change him for the better."

As far as the letter, if you can with a clean heart before God write him one, go ahead and do so. Pray and look to see the Lord glorified in the matter, pointing the offender towards the Lord Jesus Christ. Consider including a good Gospel tract as well!

Some other great verses and examples brought up by others too!

Pro 11:14 Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of (Godly) counsellors there is safety.

Seeing your nieces for Christmas sounds like a real blessing!

May you and your extended visiting family have a great Christmas together!

[TsukinoRei]

Abortion seems to be a big topic on many Christian forums I'm on. Well, this subject got me thinking about an incident that happened to my sister. Pro-choicers talk about cases of rape or incest. Well...It's easy to say "don't blame the baby for the crimes of the rapist" until it's happened to you or someone you love.

My oldest sister was raped and beaten to within an inch of her life with a chain eight, nearly nine years ago by a man she once considered her friend. She was only 18 and she got pregnant and she made the choice to keep the baby. Her fiance (later that year, husband) agreed because it was her decision. But we would have totally sympathized with her if she decided to abort the pregnancy. However, what came out of this traumatic event for our family was a beautiful little girl. My sister bore a daughter, my little niece who I love more than anything and you know what, she and her husband had another little girl two years later.

As for the rapist, that scumbag got 35 years for rape and attempted murder. He nearly killed my sister, he raped and beat her with no remorse, and now he's getting what he deserves. And I hope one day he'll get to see the beautiful result of his crime that the Lord granted my sister. This beautiful angel of a little girl who will never acknowledge him as her father. He's going to be locked away for decades and when they finally release him (that is if he survives prison), he'll be branded a sex offender until the day he dies. She only visited him at the prison one time and that was in 2010. My sister looked that man dead in the eye through that glass and told him that she forgives him and loves him as a good Christian woman. Now I'm only telling you this because my sister speaks to rape victims and encourages them not to abort. I can only hope he finds Christ in prison because I know I can't forgive him for what he's done but I suppose I should because if he hadn't I wouldn't have my older niece.

Well, now I want to write this person a letter expressing my feelings to him that I kept in me for years. Now that I'm an adult, a proud uncle of two, a Marine veteran with two deployments, and a father to be, I want to write to him not out of spite but just the straight facts. Do you think I should? And what should I say. My sister didn't tell him about her daughter, she was very to-the-point with him. I will not succumb to hatred even though I can honestly say I hate him.

Please, if you're going to post scripture, explain how it's relevant.

When I think of people who grieviously wronged me it helps me to think of them as already dead. Experiences in life change us so much over time. The person I was is gone. The person they were is gone. There's no point in hating shadows. It's okay to feel outrage about what happened. What happened was outrageous. The outrage and the anger and the pain will always be there and it should, with perspective and perseverence the results of those feelings can be great. They can give you compassion and determination. Real pain doesn't go away, it turns into wisdom.

James 1: 2-4

² Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,^[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

I think that you shouldn't invite this person into your life again. Dust your feet and walk away. Leave him to wrestle with God and his demons. You may find though that writing the letter helps you to reflect and crystalise your thoughts on the issue and make you aware of what more you can learn for yourself or do for others. Perhaps write the letter for your own peace of mind, and then give it to God?

Edited January 4, 2013 by BatSheep

[ears]

Everyonce in a while I listen to a preacher on tv that is a product of rape (James Robinson). When I hear him tell his story I am always so aware of how little we really know about things going on around us every minute. Our minds can't understand how things can possibly be the way they seem. For now we must just trust our Lord. He tells us to forgive and more than that he will give us an able heart to forgive if we will trust him to. Sounds to me like God made a pretty wonderful Uncle for that little neice of yours. God Bless You.