Can an unmarried couple sleep in the same bed and they know they aren't going to have sex?

[missmuffet]

49 minutes ago, JMan108 said:

My parents aren't Christians so they're still surprised that neither of us has had sex yet in our lives.

That is too bad. Perhaps you can show them how a born again Christian conducts their life. Be a Christian example.

[JMan108]

Just now, missmuffet said:

That is too bad. Perhaps you can show them how a born again Christian conducts their life. Be a Christian example.

Already am an example to the best of my God-given ability.

[missmuffet]

Just now, JMan108 said:

Already am an example to the best of my God-given ability.

Good, that is the way it should be.

[MorningGlory]

I'll add my agreement to what others have said, Iman.  It's best not to bring temptation into the relationship.  That way, you don't have to deal with it.  Sleep apart and kudos to you and your girlfriend for waiting until you're married.  And welcome to Worthy!

[Neighbor]

8 hours ago, JMan108 said:

My girlfriend is coming up to visit me and she is obviously staying in my house (I still live with my parents since I'm in college). Can we share a bed when we know we're not going to be having sex? We have already said that is off the table and we know we're saving ourselves for marriage.

As we say in the locker room "yeh sure".

Let me turn the question around a bit- If either one of you can "sleep" together and not burn with passion for each other, you really don't want to be marrying each other. For neither  of you are the right person for the other to be forming a marital couple. Passion is not a secondary thing in a young person's marriage plans. It is a primary and biological reason for marriage. It would be insane to say,  hey lets bed together and not engage in passion's pursuits. Yeh sure, that will work.

[Justin Adams]

You are quite mad.

Just find a minister and get married. That solves all questions you pose.

[JMan108]

2 hours ago, Neighbor said:

As we say in the locker room "yeh sure".

Let me turn the question around a bit- If either one of you can "sleep" together and not burn with passion for each other, you really don't want to be marrying each other. For neither  of you are the right person for the other to be forming a marital couple. Passion is not a secondary thing in a young person's marriage plans. It is a primary and biological reason for marriage. It would be insane to say,  hey lets bed together and not engage in passion's pursuits. Yeh sure, that will work.

We have something called self-control. It's not like either one of us couldn't have had sex already. We do have that passion, but we know that God says that we aren't supposed to act on it yet.

[Neighbor]

Welcome to Worthy! But really?

Bed with her and her testimony is shot. Plus yours is shot, before your parents forever. 

You want to  encourage your parents to hear you testify about your Lord and savior, then live above reproach, above suspicion, above accusation by not giving  the enemy ammunition that will be saved for later, and then used against your future testimony.

It won't matter then what  did or didn't happen, it will only matter that the testimony will  seem to be the hypocritical, and that  will defeat  proclamations and testimony to them.

It may even be the testimony given by another that gets defeated. For they will remember, and say- oh yes you Christians all talk the walk but you don't walk it,  why even my son and daughter in law, they talked it but they also slept together in our house as boyfriend and girlfriend. So nice try but Christians don't really walk any differently than anyone else.

That will happen, as time goes by  and memories get faded a bit- when the challenge comes to them,  they will remember things a little differently than you are portraying how they are going to play out now.

You need to step up big now or lose even bigger later!

Hey you asked the question, now you want to debate the response?  Don't ever set yourself up for defeats that will hinder your future testimony as a witness of the gospel of Jesus, nor of your bride to be's.

May God lead to through  thinking, praying, and foreseeing the result of how you  respond to the challenge that is in front of you  today.

 

Ha, look at the old images of bundling and bundling beds, even then things happened for if there is a strong passion there will be found a way to defeat all good prior intent. See and read and pray  and think about Johnathan Edwards comments about it at  https://books.google.com/books?id=SeGd_Ry34_MC&lpg=PA130&ots=gv6GO_MWjE&dq="jonathan edwards" bundling&pg=PA130#v=onepage&q="jonathan edwards" bundling&f=false

[Guest shiloh357]

13 hours ago, JMan108 said:

My girlfriend is coming up to visit me and she is obviously staying in my house (I still live with my parents since I'm in college). Can we share a bed when we know we're not going to be having sex? We have already said that is off the table and we know we're saving ourselves for marriage.

That is the epitome of a lack of wisdom.   You need to find another room to sleep in even if it means sleeping on the floor with blanket or pillow.   We are commanded to flee from sin as far away as we can, not see how close we can get without getting burned.

You need to guard yourself and make other arrangements and preserve her honor and yours.  What you are suggesting is a bad, bad, bad idea.

[Abideandseek]

Coming from someone who waited to have sex until after marriage, I would agree with Shiloh. You are just increasing the chances of it happening even if you don't intend on it happening. Plus, I think it would be more respectful for everyone in your household if you don't share a bed with your girlfriend. I know it is hard because you may not always see each other and it is nice to have the one you love close to you while she is visiting but that is one thing I never did with my now husband, it is just a better idea to have separate sleeping areas. We prayed about it often, I suggest doing that as well and maybe even praying about it with your girlfriend. But good for both of you to make the decision to stay faithful to God and abide in Him! <3 

I do have an article I have written on Listening to God's Relationship Guidance if you would like to check it out. Unlike you, I was in secular relationships prior to my marriage where I engaged in sex and once I surrendered my self to Jesus, my outlook on relationships completely changed! And changed for the better !! I have suggestions in there from experience and comparing my secular relationship to my Christian one, there are big differences between the two and I suggest things you and your girlfriend may want to consider <3

Take care and enjoy your girlfriend's company and know God just wants the best for you both <3

Be Blessed, 

Nick & Leah

Co-founders of Abide and Seek