Parents disapproval of relationship

[Aldo7]

Hello!

I was hoping to seek some advice. I have started a relationship with  a Godly woman. She loves Jesus and lives for him. She's a kind and respectful soul and someone I could possibly see spending the rest of my life with. However I still live at home and my parents disapprove of her only because she's a different race. I don't wanna disrespect my parents but I don't want to lose the relationship because of their opinions. I was hoping to get some advice on what would be the best way to approach this situation? I'm scared that disobeying their wishes of me not dating her would be disrespecting God somehow. I really don't want to disappoint Him either. 

Thank you

 

[Willa]

God does not seem to approve of racial prejudice.  Moses' second wife was and Ethiopian woman.  When Moses' sister disapproved God allowed her to become a leper.  

Num 12:1  Then Miriam and Aaron spoke against Moses because of the Ethiopian woman whom he had married; for he had married an Ethiopian woman.

Num 12:8  I speak with him face to face, Even plainly, and not in dark sayings; And he sees the form of the LORD. Why then were you not afraid To speak against My servant Moses?" Num 12:9  So the anger of the LORD was aroused against them, and He departed. Num 12:10  And when the cloud departed from above the tabernacle, suddenly Miriam became leprous, as white assnow. Then Aaron turned toward Miriam, and there she was, a leper. Num 12:11  So Aaron said to Moses, "Oh, my lord! Please do not lay this sin on us, in which we have done foolishly and in which we have sinned. Num 12:12  Please do not let her be as one dead, whose flesh is half consumed when he comes out of his mother's womb!" Num 12:13  So Moses cried out to the LORD, saying, "Please heal her, O God, I pray!"

 

Mat 19:4  He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female  Mat 19:5  and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

I also agree that to marry a guy needs to be prepared to support his wife and potential children, and have a place for them to live.  Some cultures live in a patriarchal society, but unless it is the custom of your culture for everyone to move into your father's house and you all must obey him, it is customary for Christians to make their own independent home.  We do believe we should honor our parents in spite of this.  Doing so can be hard at times.  My father in law disapproved of me because I am a Christian.  My husband felt caught between for many years till he also was saved.  Then he stood up to his dad, and his dad somehow respected him for it.  

I told our sons to wait till they were in their mid 20s and established in a good job before they married.  Most men aren't mature enough to settle down and provide for a family before then.

[john1]

On ‎1‎/‎14‎/‎2018 at 8:32 AM, Aldo7 said:

she's a different race

Acts chapter 17 verse 26

From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands.
 

 

If your parents are Christians maybe point this out to them.

[Sanctum]

4 hours ago, Yowm said:

Seems some didn't like my reply...

Ok, stay at home, live off your parents, don't marry, stay single, be non gender.

If you are invalid and have to stay at home have your wife move in.

I thought your reply was rude and totally unnecessary. The OP was asking for advice about his parents.

There was a time when most young men lived at home until marriage, and I personally think it should stay that way.

Also, just because someone lives at home doesn't mean they have no job. And I don't see anywhere that he says he is an invalid.

Please exercise a little compassion and understanding?

[frienduff thaylorde]

On ‎1‎/‎14‎/‎2018 at 5:32 AM, Aldo7 said:

Hello!

I was hoping to seek some advice. I have started a relationship with  a Godly woman. She loves Jesus and lives for him. She's a kind and respectful soul and someone I could possibly see spending the rest of my life with. However I still live at home and my parents disapprove of her only because she's a different race. I don't wanna disrespect my parents but I don't want to lose the relationship because of their opinions. I was hoping to get some advice on what would be the best way to approach this situation? I'm scared that disobeying their wishes of me not dating her would be disrespecting God somehow. I really don't want to disappoint Him either. 

Thank you

 

How well do you know your scrips.    Be respectful to your parents when explaining this to them.

The flesh means nothing .  IF the only reason is her race then that is a problem.    IF she were ungodly then I would surely understand your parents .

But is the color of the skin is the only reason .    That is not right .

In fact if you are white and the woman you wanted to marry was white but ungodly,  I WOULD say NOT EVEN.

but if you are white and she is black and she believes,    I would say amen to it.    ITS NOT THE FLESH that unites anyone of CHRIST , ITS THE SPIRIT .

our connection , our family are THOSE WHO DO THE WILL OF THE FATHER .    be patient and not rude when telling them this.   No matter if your right

you cannot rebuke your parents like they are the children.  You have to do it with the approach of respecting the elder .   

[Sanctum]

On 1/14/2018 at 6:32 AM, Aldo7 said:

Hello!

I was hoping to seek some advice. I have started a relationship with  a Godly woman. She loves Jesus and lives for him. She's a kind and respectful soul and someone I could possibly see spending the rest of my life with. However I still live at home and my parents disapprove of her only because she's a different race. I don't wanna disrespect my parents but I don't want to lose the relationship because of their opinions. I was hoping to get some advice on what would be the best way to approach this situation? I'm scared that disobeying their wishes of me not dating her would be disrespecting God somehow. I really don't want to disappoint Him either. 

Thank you

 

Hi Aldo,

This sounds like a tough situation. I know how it is to feel led by God in one direction but have the disapproval of my parents. Sadly prejudices run deep and can be hard to break, but nothing is impossible with God! Pray over the situation and consider how to approach your parents. If they are believers, studying the Bible, particularly the NT, and writing down what it says about races (Jews vs. Greeks) and prejudice, may be helpful. Sit down with them and talk over the situation, find out just what their concerns are and see if there is something you can do. It is NOT wrong to date a woman of a different race, but the Bible says to respect your parents.

All the best!

[simplejeff]

5 minutes ago, Sanctum said:

There was a time when most young men lived at home until marriage, and I personally think it should stay that way.

COOL!      (You mean live like ABRAHAM'S FAMILY  ,  ABRAHAM the FATHER OF FAITH (DECLARED SO BY YHWH) )

Just think what could happen,  what DOES HAPPEN,  when people live as directed BY YHWH ! 

[walla299]

On 1/14/2018 at 6:32 AM, Aldo7 said:

Hello!

I was hoping to seek some advice. I have started a relationship with  a Godly woman. She loves Jesus and lives for him. She's a kind and respectful soul and someone I could possibly see spending the rest of my life with. However I still live at home and my parents disapprove of her only because she's a different race. I don't wanna disrespect my parents but I don't want to lose the relationship because of their opinions. I was hoping to get some advice on what would be the best way to approach this situation? I'm scared that disobeying their wishes of me not dating her would be disrespecting God somehow. I really don't want to disappoint Him either. 

Thank you

First: God says there's only one race. The human race. The racial bias can safely be tossed out the proverbial window, I think. Know that your parents may not come around to this view quickly. Pray for them in this regard if that happens. God will make the impossible possible if its His will to do so.

Second: Start praying that the Lord will bring the right woman into your life, and make preparations to be a good husband while you're at it. The relationship will flourish if she's the one God has for you. On the good husband part, seek wise counsel from you pastor, elders, etc. Keep praying.

Third: Get a career established if you haven't already. There's no shame in living at home while preparing, though. Use that time to save up money for a place to live and all that.

"Prepare your work outside; 
    get everything ready for yourself in the field,
    and after that build your house." -- Proverbs 24:27

 

[missmuffet]

On 1/14/2018 at 5:32 AM, Aldo7 said:

Hello!

I was hoping to seek some advice. I have started a relationship with  a Godly woman. She loves Jesus and lives for him. She's a kind and respectful soul and someone I could possibly see spending the rest of my life with. However I still live at home and my parents disapprove of her only because she's a different race. I don't wanna disrespect my parents but I don't want to lose the relationship because of their opinions. I was hoping to get some advice on what would be the best way to approach this situation? I'm scared that disobeying their wishes of me not dating her would be disrespecting God somehow. I really don't want to disappoint Him either. 

Thank you

 

How old are you? God does not see color so why should you and why should your parents? There might be some difficulty in the different cultures. You need to pray about this and give it to God.

[CreationIsBeautiful]

5 hours ago, Yowm said:

Seems some didn't like my reply...

Ok, stay at home, live off your parents, don't marry, stay single, be non gender.

If you are invalid and have to stay at home have your wife move in.

Now that this thread is open to commoners, I will say my piece.  You belittled this man for living with his parents.  You assumed he did not work a job.  You assumed he had no plan to move out before getting married.  Finally, you did not address his concern.  Your response was unkind and lacked grace.