Is it weird to wish someone well who wronged you?

[GreyDestiny]

   I was getting on-the-job training from a guy we'll just call Jeremy. Now, during my training, Jeremy not only put his work on top of my own so that he could slack off, but he was also apparently training me incorrectly hoping that i'd mess up and get fired. Instead, Jeremy got fired and I seemingly have a new trainer, in the employer's hope of breaking me of the false training I was given by Jeremy.

   While I was working under Jeremy, I have to admit to not being too terribly fond of him (if you can imagine that). Like I said, he would walk off and leave me to do two people's work.  The revelation that he was teaching me the wrong things has also significantly lowered my opinion of him. He also mentioned, however, that he needed this job because he had kids. He mentioned he moved to the area from a few states away, hoping to find work. He didn't seem to be lying.

   On one hand, he has kids to take care of. One the other, if he really needed this job, went through such effort to obtain it, and wanted to stay there, why was he so unambitious? 

   I feel like I should wish him and his children well either way, but I also just feel weird doing so for a guy who pretty much did it to himself.

Edited January 27, 2018 by GreyDestiny
Spelling errors

[wingnut-]

Matthew 5:44  But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,

[missmuffet]

1 hour ago, GreyDestiny said:

   I was getting on-the-job training from a guy we'll just call Jeremy. Now, during my training, Jeremy not only put his work on top of my own so that he could slack off, but he was also apparently training me incorrectly hoping that i'd mess up and get fired. Instead, Jeremy got fired and I seemingly have a new trainer, in the employer's hope of breaking me of the false training I was given by Jeremy.

   While I was working under Jeremy, I have to admit to not being too terribly fond of him (if you can imagine that). Like I said, he would walk off and leave me to do two people's work.  The revelation that he was teaching me the wrong things has also significantly lowered my opinion of him. He also mentioned, however, that he needed this job because he had kids. He mentioned he moved to the area from a few states away, hoping to find work. He didn't seem to be lying.

   On one hand, he has kids to take care of. One the other, if he really needed this job, went through such effort to obtain it, and wanted to stay there, why was he so unambitious? 

   I feel like I should wish him and his children well either way, but I also just feel weird doing so for a guy who pretty much did it to himself.

You would be very surprised that your situation with the person who was training you is not that uncommon. Vindictive people are all around us. I have seen a situation similar to your situation before. There are many who "sleep" on the job which is a way of stealing from the company. I think you should pray about this situation and pray for this person who trained you. God knows everything you have endured under this person.

[GandalfTheWise]

@GreyDestiny

Wishing someone well is a sign of healthy maturity where you can let stuff go.  I've known some people who months and years later would still be angry about things like that.

I've run into similar people in my career. I try to professionally avoid having entanglements with them even though I bear them no malice.  I put it into the same category of keeping a distance from friends and family when they are sick.  My sense of things is that it's usually best to professionally avoid people who are toxic to your career and still be pleasant and cordial outside of job situations.

[notsolostsoul]

It can feel weird to wish someone well when they have wronged you, but you should and mean it.

Romans 12:19-21King James Version (KJV)

19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.

21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good

 

You can take the verses literally. I see it like this:

You know this person was wrong, God also knows this person was wrong. You did not have to address him because God did, him losing his job. (12:19)

By wishing him well and meaning it, you would be obeying God, by showing mercy towards, say an enemy, despite the wrong he has done to you. God likes that. (12:20)

God rather you remain good, even when you are done wrong. It speaks to the condition of your heart. (12:21)

So feeling bad that Jeremy is going to have difficulties, is a God natured feeling. We shouldn't want harm towards others.

However, pray for Jeremy, that he learns the lesson God is going to teach him. Trust that God will handle him accordingly.

[Adstar]

13 hours ago, GreyDestiny said:

   I was getting on-the-job training from a guy we'll just call Jeremy. Now, during my training, Jeremy not only put his work on top of my own so that he could slack off, but he was also apparently training me incorrectly hoping that i'd mess up and get fired. Instead, Jeremy got fired and I seemingly have a new trainer, in the employer's hope of breaking me of the false training I was given by Jeremy.

   While I was working under Jeremy, I have to admit to not being too terribly fond of him (if you can imagine that). Like I said, he would walk off and leave me to do two people's work.  The revelation that he was teaching me the wrong things has also significantly lowered my opinion of him. He also mentioned, however, that he needed this job because he had kids. He mentioned he moved to the area from a few states away, hoping to find work. He didn't seem to be lying.

   On one hand, he has kids to take care of. One the other, if he really needed this job, went through such effort to obtain it, and wanted to stay there, why was he so unambitious? 

   I feel like I should wish him and his children well either way, but I also just feel weird doing so for a guy who pretty much did it to himself.

Jeremy is just a human like you and in the end he is a faulty human.. So it should be natural to wish the best for our fellow humans even when they have done us wrong.. Also there are kids involved so we should be wishing for their wellbeing and their wellbeing is linked to their dads..  We should always hope that our follow human beings become better people and have the things they need to make it through this life.. For our Father in heaven makes the rain fall on the evil and the good.. His mercy and patience with us is enduring..

Matthew 5:KJV

45 "That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust."