In need of help and confirmation

[hyd241]

I have been beside myself for weeks! Im just gonna get straight to the point. When I was young around 13 I saw porn for the first time by accidentally stumbling upon a site I miss spelled (in all honesty). And the porn I saw was gay porn. I watched bits of it and sadly got facinated and even more sadly attracted to it even tho I still was attracted to girls. I had a horrible habit of it throughout the year but never did it with anyone bc I knew it was wrong anyway. But half way through last year I accepted christ as Lord through a youth retreat. Past then ive felt alot of guilt for my actions and continued on with my habit the follow weeks. It was just recent were ive been so down on myself for these acts and I broke out crying to the Lord asking for forgiveness and how poor of a representation I was. Its so hard to be a light for God kingdom when you are commiting sins like these wether its any sin (all sin is same in Gods eyes, except blasphemy of the holy spirit). But more recently I watched it again but wasnt gay porn. Im embarrassed to talk about this but really want answers to my questions especially from a place where multiple christians can answer. My questions are am I saved? Ive heard so much to God loves gays (he doesnt like the gay part) to u are going straight to hell if youve ever felt that way towards same gender. I want to be at rest with this bc the thought of being seperated from God scares me. And second How can I tell im saved if I am?  I know its through the holy spirit and I hear him getting at me to pray and to ask for forgivness and tells me to do things like help others or points out certain people that I need to be nice to or pray for them. Its just im so so so scared of wondering if im saved or not based on all my horrible actions. Ik I have the holy spirit within me I am just worried and scared. I need %100 confirmation of these things. I want to be at rest and tired of battling myself. Plz help and pray for me. God bless you.

[Willa]

Welcome to Worthy, hyd.  If you have a mens retreat or Bible study/prayer, ask for prayer and accountability.  Humble yourself before them.  You may find that many have these problems.

 1Co 10:13  No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

 

[BeauJangles]

Hi, hyb. Listen closely. If you truly accepted Christ as Saviour and Lord, HE has accepted you! Please understand, as Willa said giving you this scripture:  1 Corinthians 10:13  There hath no temptation taken you but such is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to bear more tempted than which ye are able; but will with the temptation make a way for you to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.  KJV  Now, this problem is more common than you could ever realize. And you can learn to overcome. You may stumble and fall, and a number of times. But if you are sincere, and I have every reason to believe you are, over time this will begin to dwindle. Eventually, you'll be a victor over this. God bless you, and I'm praying for you. 

Shalom, 

David/BeauJangles 

[Blood Bought 1953]

 

It is a great positive that you see your sin and confess it....no excuses and no rationalizations.Nobody gets saved until they know that they are lost.If you understand that and you are sincere,try this—- your sin is a sin of the flesh,easy to forgive .A man much more wicked than you  with sin that showed an evil heart saw that he was a sinner that needed help to be saved.He cried out... “ Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.” He became Justified, as if he had never sinned, because he turned to God ( repented) as a lost sinner.Turn to God, admit you are helpless to live a life that would reach His Standard, That Standard being Perfect.Faith is what saves.....faith is believing a promise of God.....Here is His greatest Promise—- “ Anybody that asks to be saved, WILL BE SAVED”..... hang you hat on that promise and let God do His work.