Concious

[Keny]

Hi again!

I need help or advice. So this doesn't happen every day but occasionally I seem to be self conscious. It's not that I think of myself as less. More like if I am talking with a friend my mouth just tenses up and I start talking a weird way or I stop talk. This happense even when I am walking on the sidewalk. I feel that it's all in my head that everyone is staring at me. Which has started becoming a problem because I started getting uncomfortable. I have read a lot of advices out there that say tstop caring what other people think about you but I can't seem to stop. I want to be selfless and not focused on myself but God and others. I don't want to care about what others think about me. Not that I stop being myself. I do a lot of crazy stuff and don't care what others think about it. However it's my facial reaction that bothers me. When I speak or smile I don't do it in a relaxed and I don't care what you think of me way.

Help! 

Keny

[mlbrokish]

18 minutes ago, Keny said:

Hi again!

I need help or advice. So this doesn't happen every day but occasionally I seem to be self conscious. It's not that I think of myself as less. More like if I am talking with a friend my mouth just tenses up and I start talking a weird way or I stop talk. This happense even when I am walking on the sidewalk. I feel that it's all in my head that everyone is staring at me. Which has started becoming a problem because I started getting uncomfortable. I have read a lot of advices out there that say tstop caring what other people think about you but I can't seem to stop. I want to be selfless and not focused on myself but God and others. I don't want to care about what others think about me. Not that I stop being myself. I do a lot of crazy stuff and don't care what others think about it. However it's my facial reaction that bothers me. When I speak or smile I don't do it in a relaxed and I don't care what you think of me way.

Help! 

Keny

I don't know if this will help or not, but I can relate to your situation, in a way.

You can't tell by my profile picture, but I have to really try to physically look like I am smiling when I have my picture taken because my mouth is naturally in a down-turned position when relaxed.   I feel like I am smiling, but the corners of my mouth aren't actually turned upwards, so the usual result is a straight-lipped look.    My husband has brought this to my attention several times, in a nice way, when he thinks that I was in bad mood, when I actually thought I was smiling.  When I realize it, I will generally try to correct the smile, if I can, but sometimes it's just easier to express how I feel with a light laugh or funny comment, so people know I am not in a bad mood.

The other thing that happens to me is I get red-faced (flushed) easily when I'm nervous and talking to people I don't see that often, or to strangers.  I can't do anything to change my skin from getting flushed and red, so I usually try to end the conversation quickly, so as not to attract attention to me.

I have considered speaking with a doctor or speech therapist to help calm my nerves and relieve the nervousness that leads to my face getting red.  Perhaps, it could help you.  I don't know.

 

[missmuffet]

3 hours ago, Keny said:

Hi again!

I need help or advice. So this doesn't happen every day but occasionally I seem to be self conscious. It's not that I think of myself as less. More like if I am talking with a friend my mouth just tenses up and I start talking a weird way or I stop talk. This happense even when I am walking on the sidewalk. I feel that it's all in my head that everyone is staring at me. Which has started becoming a problem because I started getting uncomfortable. I have read a lot of advices out there that say tstop caring what other people think about you but I can't seem to stop. I want to be selfless and not focused on myself but God and others. I don't want to care about what others think about me. Not that I stop being myself. I do a lot of crazy stuff and don't care what others think about it. However it's my facial reaction that bothers me. When I speak or smile I don't do it in a relaxed and I don't care what you think of me way.

Help! 

Keny

Do you think that you have a serious social anxiety issue? Do you have a low self esteem?

[Keny]

7 hours ago, missmuffet said:

Do you think that you have a serious social anxiety issue? Do you have a low self esteem?

I used to have self esteem problems. Though now I am better and I don't consider myself to have social anxiety even though at times I do get tense speaking to strangers. Which I think is normal. Sometimes I think that the problem is I want to not have problems. Even though that's never gonna happen. I just have problem accepting that I am going to be worried, self conscious etc. In life. I just don't know how?!

[Billiards Ball]

11 hours ago, Keny said:

Hi again!

I need help or advice. So this doesn't happen every day but occasionally I seem to be self conscious. It's not that I think of myself as less. More like if I am talking with a friend my mouth just tenses up and I start talking a weird way or I stop talk. This happense even when I am walking on the sidewalk. I feel that it's all in my head that everyone is staring at me. Which has started becoming a problem because I started getting uncomfortable. I have read a lot of advices out there that say tstop caring what other people think about you but I can't seem to stop. I want to be selfless and not focused on myself but God and others. I don't want to care about what others think about me. Not that I stop being myself. I do a lot of crazy stuff and don't care what others think about it. However it's my facial reaction that bothers me. When I speak or smile I don't do it in a relaxed and I don't care what you think of me way.

Help! 

Keny

I think it's time for some Christian counseling, have you spoken with your church pastors about this issue?

[Repose]

"I am worried about how other people see me."

"So do not worry about how other people see you."

That is what I like to call unhelpful and empty advice. It's like telling a smoker to stop smoking, like it's some kind of magic spell where POOF, due to that advice (more of a statement, really), they suddenly don't smoke anymore.

It sounds like a lack of confidence to me. I know it might sound strange, but working out might help. When you feel good, you feel more confident. If it's a matter of attractiveness, different strokes for different folks; people are more than their appearance anyway. Then, while this may seem like the empty advice above, consider for a second what people looking at you and judging you would even mean. One person cares enough about how you're talking and mocks you in their mind... Woopdeedoo. It's silly enough that they even bother to care that much. Shrug them off. Take it as a compliment, even.

[JustPassingThru]

Hi Keny, ...may I ask, ...are you young?

I ask that because as you mature and go to work you will gain confidence in yourself, the more you learn and become adept at what you do, ...the more you will see what Father has accomplished through you.

However, until that time and if you are born again, ...here are some verses you need to appropriate into your heart:

According as He (Father) hath chosen us in Him (Jesus) before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him (Father) in love: Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to Himself (Father), according to the good pleasure of His (Father) will, To the praise of the glory of His (Father) grace, wherein He (Father) hath made us accepted in the beloved (Jesus).  Eph 1:4-6

Look at the blessing you already possess, ...you are chosen, holy, blameless, adopted, it was an emotional choice to adopt you because Father loves you, you possess His Grace and the icing on the cake is, ...you are accepted just as you are right now and not what you will become in the future!

May I humbly suggest you replace those thoughts of everyone is looking at you with these spiritual Truths/facts. 

Lord bless

[Keny]

3 hours ago, Billiards Ball said:

I think it's time for some Christian counseling, have you spoken with your church pastors about this issue?

No because there is no one around where I am comfortable talking to. 

[Still Alive]

Are you under 25?

[Keny]

1 hour ago, JustPassingThru said:

Hi Keny, ...may I ask, ...are you young?

I ask that because as you mature and go to work you will gain confidence in yourself, the more you learn and become adept at what you do, ...the more you will see what Father has accomplished through you.

However, until that time and if you are born again, ...here are some verses you need to appropriate into your heart:

According as He (Father) hath chosen us in Him (Jesus) before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him (Father) in love: Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to Himself (Father), according to the good pleasure of His (Father) will, To the praise of the glory of His (Father) grace, wherein He (Father) hath made us accepted in the beloved (Jesus).  Eph 1:4-6

Look at the blessing you already possess, ...you are chosen, holy, blameless, adopted, it was an emotional choice to adopt you because Father loves you, you possess His Grace and the icing on the cake is, ...you are accepted just as you are right now and not what you will become in the future!

May I humbly suggest you replace those thoughts of everyone is looking at you with these spiritual Truths/facts. 

Lord bless

Alright. Thanks! I am young by the way. I am actually confused why you call my reaction. Because I accept myself and everything. Do crazy things with my friends but don't care what others think. However I just kind of think ( which is sometimes true) that people are looking at me. When a person actually stares at me, it's much easier to handle because I can stare back at them. Though sometimes they just don't seem to stop staring. However when you have a feeling that someone is staring at you but can't respond is quite frustrating!