How to know if someone's genuine or faking?

[DeighAnn]

Look for the people with a couple of bags of stuff sitting in the shade of the day not bothering anyone.  Go grab some food and a drink, come back and say "hey, Are you hungry and thirsty?".  They don't say no, they say God Bless you, and when you tell them "He does and that is why He is blessing you now", look in their eyes.  You will or won't see it.  And whenever you, it is well worth all the times you didn't.  

[Debp]

There are many homeless here so it's impossible to give to all of those that panhandle.   But some, like senior citizens or older people who are practically in tatters or seem in ill health or infirm, or just discouraged usually do need help.   One can use discernment in these cases, to give to them.

In other cases, yes, many do take advantage.   While waiting for the shuttle at the market to take me home....a lady kept driving around in a big car, like an SUV.   She kept driving up to people and asking for money.   She kept circling the store parking lot for 45 minutes while I waited for the shuttle.   She was still circling the lot when I got into the van!   I mentioned her to the shuttle driver.   He said she does that every week.   And he said she also changes her cars, she has another car!

I also heard a well known pastor talking about this issue.   He said a person approached him as he was entering a restaurant.  They said they needed $30 for a car part so they could fix their car.    He gave them the money.   The next week he again ran into that person....the person again asked him for $30, same story.   The person didn't recognize him.   That time he didn't give as he realized it was a scam.

 So you really just need to use alot of discernment or give to charities working with the homeless.   Clothing and food vouchers are good, too.

[Coliseum]

13 minutes ago, Debp said:

There are many homeless here so it's impossible to give to all of those that panhandle.   But some, like senior citizens or older people who are practically in tatters or seem in ill health or infirm, or just discouraged usually do need help.   One can use discernment in these cases, to give to them.

In other cases, yes, many do take advantage.   While waiting for the shuttle at the market to take me home....a lady kept driving around in a big car, like an SUV.   She kept driving up to people and asking for money.   She kept circling the store parking lot for 45 minutes while I waited for the shuttle.   She was still circling the lot when I got into the van!   I mentioned her to the shuttle driver.   He said she does that every week.   And he said she also changes her cars, she has another car!

I also heard a well known pastor talking about this issue.   He said a person approached him as he was entering a restaurant.  They said they needed $30 for a car part so they could fix their car.    He gave them the money.   The next week he again ran into that person....the person again asked him for $30, same story.   The person didn't recognize him.   That time he didn't give as he realized it was a scam.

 So you really just need to use alot of discernment or give to charities working with the homeless.   Clothing and food vouchers are good, too.

Sometimes giving is not always what someone must do for those without. A young sister from church was in a grocery store at the checkout counter. She asked the cashier how she was doing. The cashier unloaded, telling her she was struggling, just wanted to get home and put her feet up and eat an ice cream cone. After the young sister left, she saw an ice cream parlor a few stores down. She purchased a $5.00 voucher and went back to the store to give it to the young cashier. All those who witnessed such generosity were overwhelmed, and the cashier had tears in her eyes. A very simple thought can turn into a very beautiful experience. 

[Daniel Marsh]

On 9/9/2020 at 11:04 PM, Figure of eighty said:

So i went to the store today and a lady was begging bc she needed money for a hotel. 

I told her i only had 5 bucks and she said anything would help and im thinking of you need to get into a hotel youd need more than 5 bucks. 

 

Idk. I mean i dont mind doing it bc Im going to get paid again but i just wonder if how tell when people are in need or trying to dupe you.

I would ask follow up questions to find out the situation.   Than, take her to proper place to deal with it.   If She is being abused,  I would take her to a woman's shelter. 

[appy]

People experiencing homelessness are human beings. None of us has the right to deny sustenance and subsistence to anyone. We should treat homeless people with respect. But too often we view the homeless person asking for money as a bum or con artist. We blame homelessness on the person when their situation could be caused by a variety of reasons.

People unexpectedly lose a job or housing for any number of reasons. Some people find housing but do not have enough funds for sustenance or personal hygiene needs. Some have jobs, but the funds they earn isn't enough to obtain housing. The electronic benefits transfer (food assistance card) a person cannot buy toilet paper, toothpaste, a toothbrush and other nonfood needs. It takes cash. You do not know their story.

Not every homeless person abuses drugs and alcohol. Whatever they do with the money, let God be the judge because we don’t always know their needs. You can give in so many ways. Let God be the judge.

Think about every time you have asked God for your needs and God provides simply because you ask of him, should we not also do the same for our fellow man? Give to them simply because they asked. It is the compassionate thing to do. It is showing mercy. Don’t second guess whether people are “really” homeless. Those who think begging is a shortcut to easy money should try standing out in the hot sun or very cold weather, humiliating themselves daily in front of total strangers who won’t even look at them or acknowledge their existence. If you decide to give money, give it unconditionally and without reserved judgments about them.

[Jayne]

On 9/10/2020 at 1:46 AM, LonerAndy said:

Anyway, that's my view.  I never.... *NEVER* give money to people on the street anymore.  They are all faking it.  All of them.

How sad for you to believe this.  Yes, there are some fakers.  There are also fake Christians, fake preachers, fake doctors, and fake everything.

I've seen street people in New Orleans - drugged out of their minds or else mentally ill - sometimes both.  These poor souls, ignored by everyone stepping over them, are NOT faking their plight.

My own town has people living under the bridges, under interstate ramps, and in abandoned homes.  They are starving, sick, and most mentally ill.  I buy them food sometimes if they come up to the street levels.  

To be this callous to the homeless is sad for me to read.

[LonerAndy]

48 minutes ago, Jayne said:

How sad for you to believe this.  Yes, there are some fakers.  There are also fake Christians, fake preachers, fake doctors, and fake everything.

I've seen street people in New Orleans - drugged out of their minds or else mentally ill - sometimes both.  These poor souls, ignored by everyone stepping over them, are NOT faking their plight.

My own town has people living under the bridges, under interstate ramps, and in abandoned homes.  They are starving, sick, and most mentally ill.  I buy them food sometimes if they come up to the street levels.  

To be this callous to the homeless is sad for me to read.

Well it shouldn't be, because it means you haven't really read what I said.

I said multiple times now in this thread, that I have worked at homeless shelters personally.  I have given money to charities for the homeless since the late 90s.

Don't take one statement out of context, and ignore everything else I said.  This isn't CNN or something.

First how did those people drugged out of their minds get there?   Did they just randomly fall down and end up with a needle in them?  No they choose to do drugs.  And yes they are mentally ill.  When you do drugs you end up mentally ill.  There is large amount of research that shows a very clear, though not universal, a connection between drug use and ended up with mental illness.

So these people are there by the choices they made.   That is not to say I oppose helping them, but don't pretend they are victims either.

My point to you is... do you think giving them money is helping them?  Because I can promise you, given them cash that they'll use for their next shot of heroin, is not helping them.   You understand the concept of "enabling" right?  Where you think you are doing something nice, when in reality you are directly participating the in the destruction of the other person.

My work at the homeless shelter was far more of a help to them.   We didn't give them money on the street, so they could go buy another hit of heroin and shoot up again.

We gave them real food.  Real clothing.  A warm bed.  And... we did not allow people to abuse the generosity of others.   People who were willing, we gave job training.  Job placement.  And helped them locate an apartment, or rental, and provided dishes, work outfits if their new job required it, toiletries, and bedding, even mattresses, and other furniture.

We also have a free clinic, where we provided health care services, and in some cases free medications to those in need.

But if all they wanted was to sit there collecting the generosity of others, and refused to do anything to move themselves out of their situation, then we gave them a dead line to move out.  We helped the people who were willing to be helped.   And didn't just sink all of our resources on people who could work, but refused to.

Because here is what you need to understand about giving out charity.   You don't have infinite dollars.  No one does.   And life is all about trade offs.  Ever hour you have in this life, can only be used for one purpose or another.  You can't spend an hour at work, and an hour with your husband or wife or your kids.   There is a trade off.  It can only be spent one way, or the other.

Same with money.  You can't help one person with a dollar, and at the same time help another person with that same dollar.  You don't have unlimited money.  One or the other.  You can give it to the guy on the street that stumbles into the club to buy another hit, or you can give it to the work study/placement program that helps a guy get a job and improve his live.

You can't give the same dollar to both.

Now you can say, that guy on the street won't use it to buy drugs and beer.....   I'm telling you, that I have seen it with my own eyes.  I have directly watched this happen.  I watched people use the money I gave them, to go into a club, and buy drugs and beer.  Saw it with my eye.  Not just once.... multiple times.

To be blunt.... in all my 20+ years, every single time I have seen someone ask for money... they lied, and blew the money.   100%.  Thus far at least.

My advice.... if you care at all about actually helping people, and not using the money G-d gave you, to destroy people.... give money to charities that help people, not to people on the street.

My opinion, my advice, based on over two decades of direct experience.

Just my opinion.

Edited September 12, 2020 by LonerAndy

[appy]

A few are homeless by choice but NOT “all” homeless are homeless by choice. Many are homeless because of circumstances that they had no control over. Those that are homeless by choice may feel a deep sense of hopelessness and feel valueless. And no wonder that they do, given the attitude of many passersby who would rather pretend the homeless don't exist. Or make false assumptions about them. Such negative attitudes dehumanize the homeless. How we think, and speak of and treat others says more about ourselves than those around us.

To say that every homeless person abuses drugs or alcohol is false. There are plenty of people that have well paying jobs and homes, plus cars, etc.…   And yet abuse drugs or alcohol. How different they are treated and thought of than the homeless. This is shameful and sinful. Even if a homeless person has a drug addiction, or mental illness; he or she deserves to be treated with dignity and compassion. NOT our scorn.

It's good to fill a homeless person's belly with food, but society expects their clothes and hair to be clean and pressed, and their hair combed. It takes cash to purchase laundry soap and operate a washing machine and drier at a laundry mat. It takes cash to obtain body soap and shampoo. It takes cash for many other small and simple things that most of us take for granted, because we have the financial means to get these things for ourselves.

[Coliseum]

14 minutes ago, appy said:

A few are homeless by choice but NOT “all” homeless are homeless by choice. Many are homeless because of circumstances that they had no control over. Those that are homeless by choice may feel a deep sense of hopelessness and feel valueless. And no wonder that they do, given the attitude of many passersby who would rather pretend the homeless don't exist. Or make false assumptions about them. Such negative attitudes dehumanize the homeless. How we think, and speak of and treat others says more about ourselves than those around us.

To say that every homeless person abuses drugs or alcohol is false. There are plenty of people that have well paying jobs and homes, plus cars, etc.…   And yet abuse drugs or alcohol. How different they are treated and thought of than the homeless. This is shameful and sinful. Even if a homeless person has a drug addiction, or mental illness; he or she deserves to be treated with dignity and compassion. NOT our scorn.

It's good to fill a homeless person's belly with food, but society expects their clothes and hair to be clean and pressed, and their hair combed. It takes cash to purchase laundry soap and operate a washing machine and drier at a laundry mat. It takes cash to obtain body soap and shampoo. It takes cash for many other small and simple things that most of us take for granted, because we have the financial means to get these things for ourselves.

I find it astonishing how Jesus interacted. The food he gave was not "free." It came with a price---a price either accepted or rejected. What was the price? Self-reflection. 
"When they found him on the other side of the lake, they asked him, "Rabbi, when did you get here?" Jesus answered, "I tell you the truth, you are looking for me, not because you saw miraculous signs but because you ate the loaves and had your fill." Jesus did not concern himself giving people temporary things; he wanted them to see the larger picture regarding their eternal condition. 

At the same time, his disciples said, "Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food.” Jesus replied, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.”

Nothing was free; it always involved an exchange---a process of self-reflection---it was always relational when Jesus spoke and acted. Nothing was wasted, not even his words.

 

[IAMinyou]

On 9/10/2020 at 5:04 AM, Figure of eighty said:

So i went to the store today and a lady was begging bc she needed money for a hotel. 

I told her i only had 5 bucks and she said anything would help and im thinking of you need to get into a hotel youd need more than 5 bucks. 

 

Idk. I mean i dont mind doing it bc Im going to get paid again but i just wonder if how tell when people are in need or trying to dupe you.

There isn't much difference in giving that beggar money than buying an Apple iPhone for $1000 knowing it will be worth half or less of what you pay for it after the new model comes out the following year. Do you give money to a human being and give him a moment of joy or sell your $1000 Apple iPhone for less than half of what you paid for it? You see, it really makes no difference where your money goes because you will still be you after giving it away.