Can a 30 year old man who is married but doesn't have children be an elder in a church?

[SIC]

22 minutes ago, appy said:

No church is perfect. Every church will have their high and low points that we agree with or disagree with. But it seems to me that since you are finding this pastor as unsatisfactory, as well as the church as a whole, that it would be best to move on to another church group that is more in line with your views.

Which is exactly what I intended to do

[Ray12614]

Unless you know from a pastor's perspective who the available choices are for being an elder, you do not have the needed information to make an judgement about who is fit to serve, and who is not.

Over the years, I have wondered 'why' various men were not chosen to serve as elders, and years later situations in their lives were revealed that explicitly disqualified those men. On the surface everything looked fine, but, in their private lives, they were a train wreck of bad decisions and moral integrity. The pastor could not reveal to the congregation his reason for not choosing those individuals because it was wrong for him to publicly expose them for their faults and/or hidden sins. Also, he was their pastor, and could not expose them and at the same time pastor them and help them.

Age does not always equate with the ability or Grace to shepherd God's people. As a 69 year old man I can say that I know many grey-haired fools who call themselves Christians, and are unfit to serve as elders. Character, faithfulness, ability to teach, and love for the congregation are all essential traits that must be in a man before he can serve as elder for the local church.

I do agree with the previous poster who said that you should find another church that is more in line with your views, however, you will always find faults in those other churches too, and you will never put down roots and grow by hopping from one church to another. I pray you don't make a habit of doing that.

Grace and Peace to you . . .  Ray . . . 

 

[Starise]

Our church selects elders every so many years since they serve terms and are voted in. We have both deacons and elders. In order to be considered a man must be nominated by at least three persons in the church to be brought up for vote. Family members are excluded from those votes to attempt to avoid nepotism. Elders are required to undergo training before they can serve.

I notice a lot of younger men seem to be considered for deacon. Not so much for elders. I believe our deacons are also expected to go through some kind of training. In addition to this we have a woman's committee that has input and helps in similar ways. 

Smaller churches are at a disadvantage from my past experiences. Access to those positions is less difficult. I don't think this is a good thing. I have seen many deacons put in office on only the pastor's mention or approval in some churches. Yeah the church holds a vote but it's basically a formality. Younger guys with children probably have less time than a young man who hasn't had children. I don't see an issue with a man who is married without children. The main issue for me would be spiritual maturity and yes, I would consider age. There's even a big difference between married for one year and married for ten years. Married and 'happily married' just shows a man is in a good strong family relationship. Sometimes families appear 'happily married' when they really aren't behind closed doors. Those who select deacons and elders need to be very perceptive. I have seen many a man that everyone liked, who turned out not to be the best candidate for the job. Same thing happens with too many jobs everywhere. Men only look at the outward appearance. Everyone likes .............. lets put him in. Whoa there. Not so fast

[missmuffet]

https://www.gotquestions.org/duties-elder-church.html

[johnthebaptist]

17 hours ago, SIC said:

Titus 1 says :

⁵ This is why I left you in Crete, so that you might put what remained into order, and appoint elders in every town as I directed you— ⁶ if anyone is above reproach, the husband of one wife,^[d] and his children are believers^[e] and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination.

Given this, Can a 30 year old man married man (godly man with a good reputation) but doesn't have children be an elder in a church?

I don't know why not.

[Willa]

Our senior pastor chooses the elders, which consist of ministerial staff and others that he consults when he makes decisions.  The deacons are chosen from those who are godly who naturally stay after church to clean and work to maintain the church property.  They also may give others a ride to services or do other practical chores.  I have been in churches where they were voted on and it ended in being a popularity contest instead of using the gifts God had given them.

Having children is not a requirement.  I do know two men who could not control their respective unsaved teen age girls  and therefore they resigned their positions. 

Some people are called to be pastor/elders at fairly young ages, as was my pastor who was called while in his 20s and found himself doing counseling.  He said  he could always tell people what the Bible said about their problems. He planted our church 30 years ago and had been a youth pastor before that. Being younger he also brought in a lot of college age people, which was really wonderful.  

[Dennis1209]

17 hours ago, appy said:

There is nothing in Titus 1 that requires a man to have children before he is chosen to be an elder.  What the verses are alluding to is the elder's overall character.  If a man's children are unruly, what does it say about him?  Unruly children are a reflection of the parents.  As the saying goes "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree". Or "like father, like son".

Verse 7 (NIV) says, Since an overseer manages God’s household, he must be blameless.  We can concur that the whole chapter is touching on our character, ambassadorship, and witness in regard to the gospel message, and our relationship with God.  Our character is a reflection of our relationship with Christ.

When a person fails to show a wholesome life.  It makes for a bad witness that drives people away from the gospel message. 

Well said. And may I add, the standards for church leadership are outlined in 1 Timothy, chapters two and three. 

[teddyv]

On 9/22/2021 at 10:08 PM, SIC said:

I feel like the lead pastor is deliberately appointing younger inexperienced men to avoid being accountable to older more wiser men.

Why is the pastor appointing elders in the first place? Red flags for me.