Encouragement

[Alive]

7 minutes ago, Starise said:

I can relate to praying and trying to 'break through'. I'm still at a place where I haven't really broken through on some concerns completely.

 I don't feel useful any more in what I once found great pleasure in. I often see no need to continue doing what I do and often here of late, I just sit in front of a distraction because I figure none of it matters anyway.

The honeymoon at my 'new' church has worn off and I see many of the same things we see in probably most churches.  I am just tired of 'big church' in general and  If it weren't for my wife who seems to really be enjoying it and who has made many friends, I would probably pull out and go back to a smaller assembly. Titles and committees and requirements to do this or that and family ties etc etc etc. It seems more like man driven church than God driven church to me. I'm at the point now where I care less and less. 

God has ways of pulling us out of our stubborn fleshly slumps( I am referring to me). I just don't want to play the game any more and that's scary. I get out of bed and my legs work and I can be somewhere I'm supposed to be, but inside I'm just not caring about much of anything any more.  Call me Eyore lol.

 

I will be praying for you, brother. Seasons. They do come and go.

[OneLight]

1 hour ago, Starise said:

I can relate to praying and trying to 'break through'. I'm still at a place where I haven't really broken through on some concerns completely.

 I don't feel useful any more in what I once found great pleasure in. I often see no need to continue doing what I do and often here of late, I just sit in front of a distraction because I figure none of it matters anyway.

The honeymoon at my 'new' church has worn off and I see many of the same things we see in probably most churches.  I am just tired of 'big church' in general and  If it weren't for my wife who seems to really be enjoying it and who has made many friends, I would probably pull out and go back to a smaller assembly. Titles and committees and requirements to do this or that and family ties etc etc etc. It seems more like man driven church than God driven church to me. I'm at the point now where I care less and less. 

God has ways of pulling us out of our stubborn fleshly slumps( I am referring to me). I just don't want to play the game any more and that's scary. I get out of bed and my legs work and I can be somewhere I'm supposed to be, but inside I'm just not caring about much of anything any more.  Call me Eyore lol.

 

We have a lot in common Brother.  I personally suffer from SAD (seasonal affective disorder) so I do look forward to warmer weather when I can get out and about more.  During the colder months life is no more than a circle for me - get up, take the dog out, clean the house, take the dog out, take the dog out, take the dog out, cook, eat, play some guitar, take the dog out ... - all the in-between times are filled with being online.

[Starise]

5 minutes ago, OneLight said:

We have a lot in common Brother.  I personally suffer from SAD (seasonal affective disorder) so I do look forward to warmer weather when I can get out and about more.  During the colder months life is no more than a circle for me - get up, take the dog out, clean the house, take the dog out, take the dog out, take the dog out, cook, eat, play some guitar, take the dog out ... - all the in-between times are filled with being online.

Praying for you as well @OneLight You mention a very good point. I think the weather can contribute to some of it.

Like you, I feel as if I'm stuck in an endless and mostly boring routine.

I'm not sure if I'll ever make retirement age. Hopefully when the weather clears things will be better.

I hope you feel better soon.

[Marathoner]

Praying for you both. 

I experience chronic depression (major depression) which began soon after my 11th birthday. This depression has nothing to do with circumstances; it begins during the month of November and persists until April.

There was a time when I suspected that I might suffer from SAD like our brother but seeing as how the depressive cycle arrives even when I find myself in a desert wilderness where the sun blazes year-round, I came to terms with this affliction of the flesh. It's my place to bear it in this world. 

My father dealt with the same major depression as did his father before him, so I understand that I inherited this from him. The depressive state is very complicated, affecting my energy level, motivation, and drive. My poor apartment suffers during the cycle which is why I'm so thankful that I live alone. Rising out of bed is the first battle of many I face every day. 

Forcing myself to eat is difficult which is the reason why I never intentionally fast. Why? It's like I'm cheating because I fast by default. It's too easy to abstain from food!

Ah, but the Lord in His wisdom provided the most excellent of coping tools that makes enduring the cycle of involuntary agony bearable: constructive work which He approves of. I derive the greatest satisfaction from serving others in season and out of season, and so I put the "negative energy" of the depressive cycle to good use in this regard. 

I pour myself out and through the pouring I find solace and peace, forgetting about this affliction for a little while. He has also given me another gift: a broken hand missing a knuckle. The bone mended swiftly but that slightly misshapen hand is a memorial of His mercy and love, a memorial which I may grab hold of during those hours when there is no constructive work to be had and I find myself alone with Him. 

That hand was broken on the day He delivered me from the grave. I remember this and through remembering, I endure.     

[OneLight]

57 minutes ago, Starise said:

Praying for you as well @OneLight You mention a very good point. I think the weather can contribute to some of it.

Like you, I feel as if I'm stuck in an endless and mostly boring routine.

I'm not sure if I'll ever make retirement age. Hopefully when the weather clears things will be better.

I hope you feel better soon.

Thanks Bro!  Yes, when I don't feel all bottled up, I do have a lot less discouraging moments.  Retirement is not all it is said to be.  More time to do nothing!

[ladypeartree]

or more time for everyone to think you have nothing to do so kindly demand ( in the best way possible ) that you do what they want done   I workharder now than I ever did whilst working full time and bringing up 4 children on my own 

[Marathoner]

6 minutes ago, ladypeartree said:

or more time for everyone to think you have nothing to do so kindly demand ( in the best way possible ) that you do what they want done   I workharder now than I ever did whilst working full time and bringing up 4 children on my own 

Ha! My apartment suffers but unleash me elsewhere and everything changes. I jump at the chance to clean up after others. 

That's why I say the depressive cycle is complicated. The tendency of depression is to focus exclusively upon oneself, yes? I've called it "inverse narcissism," and this seems to stick well. The narcissist is the best thing since sliced bread whereas the inverse narcissist is the Heartbreak of Psoriasis. 

The Lord, therefore, encourages me to forget about myself by focusing upon others: first Him, and then my neighbor. The greatest beauty is invariably touched by the deepest sorrow, for in this way Jesus Christ has given me a blessing beyond compare in this world. 

By devoting myself to His commandment, I overcome the abyss of despair which seeks to claim my life. We are the work of His hand, set aside for His purpose and good pleasure to the glory of His name. This is how the Lord made me, so this affliction is no accident nor twist of fortune. He saw fit to deliver me from much, but see how He left this depression intact?

The greatest beauty is invariably touched by the deepest sorrow. I remember the words of the prophet:

Who has believed our report?
And to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed?
For He grew up before Him like a tender shoot,
And like a root out of dry ground;
He has no stately form or majesty
That we would look at Him,
Nor an appearance that we would take pleasure in Him.
He was despised and abandoned by men,
A man of great pain and familiar with sickness;
And like one from whom people hide their faces,
He was despised, and we had no regard for Him.
(Isaiah 53:1-3 NASB)

The Lord knows what we endure in this world. 

[Starise]

3 minutes ago, Marathoner said:

The Lord, therefore, encourages me to forget about myself by focusing upon others: first Him, and then my neighbor. The greatest beauty is invariably touched by the deepest sorrow, for in this way Jesus Christ has given me a blessing beyond compare in this world. 

Thanks for sharing your thoughts Marathoner,

I have found this is also key for me to in forgetting about feeling depressed. If I can find something to do to or someone that needs help to stay busy it helps. 

The old saying, " Don't worry, be happy". is easier said than done sometimes. I am not naturally inclined to be happy by default.

I once asked God to do whatever it would take to draw me closer to Him. He did some radical things in my life. Some of them I can't  share here. Suffice it to say I live constantly with a few "Thorns in the flesh" and sometimes I wonder if this is part of my depression. I face these things every hour of every day.

Thank the Lord at least I can still move about and work. I have much to be thankful for.

[Alive]

I am not a psych doc and I haven't played one on TV, but I have a notion or two about human behavior, as I is one.

First--emotions are often unreliable measures of reality.

Second--happiness is over-rated. If we are monitoring ourselves for a sense of 'happiness' and don't seem to feel 'it', then this continual  monitoring and coming up short can be depressing.

The key is 'contentment'--not 'happiness'. Happiness is a fleeting thing, whereas contentment is a rock.

One reason that busi-ness is helpful and concentration on a task more so...we don't dwell.

 

[Marathoner]

3 minutes ago, Starise said:

Thanks for sharing your thoughts Marathoner,

I have found this is also key for me to in forgetting about feeling depressed. If I can find something to do to or someone that needs help to stay busy it helps. 

The old saying, " Don't worry, be happy". is easier said than done sometimes. I am not naturally inclined to be happy by default.

I once asked God to do whatever it would take to draw me closer to Him. He did some radical things in my life. Some of them I can't  share here. Suffice it to say I live constantly with a few "Thorns in the flesh" and sometimes I wonder if this is part of my depression. I face these things every hour of every day.

Thank the Lord at least I can still move about and work. I have much to be thankful for.

We press on, brother. Pressing on is what we do, and that is the very definition of endurance. 

If we faced no adversity, then what need would we have for endurance?
If we were to walk by sight and not faith then the Lord would not cultivate patience in us, for we would never be subjected to the trial. 

Yet it pleases Him to do so. This is how we know we are to be like Him because before we were, He was. As He suffered, so do we.