Celibacy - Gift/No Gift

[Openly Curious]

Hey guys, and good evening. I have a good question.

 

Do you think celibacy is a gift implanted from God into a christian, or is it something that takes time, practice, service and continual prayer..

 

thus being a choice we make.. - Blessings All, DRS81

 

I think celibacy is a heart choice.  I don't view celibacy as a gift per say implanted from God.  We all as individuals have to choose what we want in this life as God has given us that freedom.  Not everyone will choose a life of celibacy and will choose to marry.  I think that if a person cannot keep their sexual desires intact then it would be better for them to marry than to burn and that is biblical advice.  If a lifetime of celibacy is desired so one can attend to the things that please God then that is where their heart will be in service to the Lord and not on fighting the sexual desires away to remain celibate.  I think it's a personal choice of one's own heart and it reminds me of the scripture "for where your treasure are, there your heart will be also."  It is a choice that should be made carefully by examination of one's own heart.  Not everyone is able to become a eunuch for the sake of the gospel.   

[Openly Curious]

 

I just want to say to Cobalt...... what you said about intimacy in a marriage was very beautiful & just what is meant by being "one flesh"......

 

[kwikphilly]

Blessings Everyone,

     I don't know who is going to disagree4(but I can guess-lol)but I think there may be some confusion here about differentiating abstinence from celibacy..................abstinence is simply abstaining from sexual intercourse & celibacy is abstaining from sexual intercourse as a vow(usually religious)not to marry......although the definition for both may be the same (ie:Webster -Miriam),unless of course you have a pre 1908 text

     This is why I gave the examples that I did in my earlier post so that it would explain why I view the true calling as a":gift"......like I said,anyone can choose to make the vow but unless it is their calling,it is usually not without great difficulty(IMO)

Praise the Lord & to God be the Glory!

                                                                                                                             With love-in Christ,Kwik

[Openly Curious]

Blessings Everyone,

     I don't know who is going to disagree4(but I can guess-lol)but I think there may be some confusion here about differentiating abstinence from celibacy..................abstinence is simply abstaining from sexual intercourse & celibacy is abstaining from sexual intercourse as a vow(usually religious)not to marry......although the definition for both may be the same (ie:Webster -Miriam),unless of course you have a pre 1908 text

     This is why I gave the examples that I did in my earlier post so that it would explain why I view the true calling as a":gift"......like I said,anyone can choose to make the vow but unless it is their calling,it is usually not without great difficulty(IMO)

Praise the Lord & to God be the Glory!

                                                                                                                             With love-in Christ,Kwik

 

 

I agree that a "calling" (vocation) upon one's life is diffiantly a gift from God this is biblical in fact......  

 

Ephesians 4:1, 7-8, 11-12 - vs. 1) I THEREFORE, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called.......vs. 7-8) But unto every one of us is given grace according to the measure of the "gift" of Christ...Wherefore he saith, When he ascended up on high, he led captivity captive, and gave "gifts" unto men......vs. 11-12) And he gave some, apostles, and some, prophets, and some, evangelists, and some, pastors and teachers...For the perfecting (maturity) of the saints, for the edifying of the body of Christ:

 

There are other gifts (callings or talents) that are different listed in the book of....1 Corinthians 12:1-11, 27-31;   1 Corinthians 13 (the gift of love the more excellent way);

 

But when it comes to a person making a vow of celibacy or a lifetime commitment to abstain they both are a personal choice of the person who is choosing to deny himself of the priviledge of natural sexual desires through marriage.  In order that they may concentrate solely on pleasing the Lord in their service (ministry) given them by God.

 

This choice and decision should not ever be made hastily in either catagory.  But should be well thought out and made from a true heart of sincerity.  Not everyone can do this as it tells us that not every one can receive it in the book of.....

 

Matthew 19:11-12 - But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given.  For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from there mother's womb:  and there are some eunuchs, which are made eunuchs of men:  and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake.  He that is Able To Receive It, Let Him Receive It. 

 

This to me in my understanding is the personal choice being made by the person who is making a vow or not making a vow of celibacy to the Lord for the kingdom of heaven's sake, which I believe entails being a eunuch spiritually by choice.  And I believe that is a hard choice for one to make not every one is able to make it.  Apostle Paul was a prime example for us to look to as he lived a life of abstinance.  I know of no scripture that teaches us or shows to us that Paul made a vow of celibacy to God to remain unmarried.  Paul was dedicated wholly to the kingdom of heaven's sake and the sake of the gospel of Jesus Christ.   Paul says this in.....

 

1 Corinthians 7:2, 7, 9, 17 - vs.2) Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband....vs. 7) For I would that all men were even as I myself.  But every man hath his proper "gift" (calling, vocation) of God, one after this manner, and another after that.......vs.9) But if they cannot contain let them marry:  for it is better to marry than to burn......vs. 17) But as God hath distributed to every man (gifts) as the Lord hath called every one so let him walk.  And so ordain I in all churches.

 

1 Corinthians 7:32 - But I would have you "without carefulness".  He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord (the kingdom of heaven's sake emphasis mine).

 

1 Corinthians 9:5, 15 - vs. 5) Have we not power to lead about a sister, a wife, as well as other apostles, and as the brethren of the Lord and Cephas?  (Paul says he has the power if he so chooses to have a family just like the other saints as well as Cephas but he didn't choose it emphasis mine).....vs. 15) But I used none of these things (Acts 18:3;) neither have I written these things, that it should be so done unto me:  for it were better for me to die, than that any man should make my glorying void (2 Corinthians 11:10).

 

Apostle Paul gave godly advice and counsel for those who are thinking about or considering a lifetime of abstinence or of making a celibacy vow remaining 100% in dedication to the Lord.  To abstain from marriage and having a family solely for the kingdom of heaven's sake and the gospel of Jesus Christ.  This kind of dedication and choice can be made with or without making a vow to God.  Those who choose abstinance or celibacy should consider carefully the words of Paul and the words of Jesus and be sure within themselves whether they will be able to contain themselves.

 

I just thought I should clarify my meaning a little more in depth. As you are correct in there being a difference between abstinence and making a vow of celibacy.   I see them both as being personal choices abstinace being without making a vow to God and celibacy as making a vow to God.  I hope this helps the discussion some.   blessings.            

[kwikphilly]

Blessings Openly Curious

    Aww,thanks for elaborating.....I just love discussing these things amongst ourselves in this way"together"......isn't it just wonderful,Praise the Lord.....We both have different opinions,neither oppose the Word of God & we reason together......both Blessing one another...............& thats how it is done,in Jesus Name!!!!!!

                                                                                                                                                   With love-in Christ.Kwik

                                                                                                                                               (& I love your itty bitty kitties)

[Guest shiloh357]

 

Tell me this:   If an opportunity for a relationship with a woman that you found desirable presented itself to you, would you reject her?

 

I already have, more than once. Heck, I could of been married with kids at age 20 if I wanted too, but everything changed after salvation. At the end of the day, I'm not blaming society or anyone else.  I'm just getting my feelings out. At the end of the day I know why I'm staying single (i have my reasons), but you're right. There is pain involved, but it would be more painful and stressful on my body to be a father. And no I don't regret or feel bad about talking about it. I find it's healthy to get it off my chest. Rejecting women is not easy, but if I don't wanna be in a relationship then that would just make my partner miserable. I get a lot of beef from my family as to why I'm still single, it's probably why I talk about it much. Sexuality is just a part of life, so talking about it is ok I think. George Clooney ended a lot of relationships because he didn't want kids, so why even start the relationship to begin with.

 

Yes, but I am not even talking about having kids.  I am talking about a relationship with a woman.  You can be married and not have children if you and your wife mutually choose not to do so.  

 

Sex isn't only about pro-creation.  Celibacy isn't about not having kids.  Are you simply rejecting marriage, or are you rejecting marriage because you think marriage presents an obligation to haved children?

[Guest DRS81]

Yes, but I am not even talking about having kids.  I am talking about a relationship with a woman.  You can be married and not have children if you and your wife mutually choose not to do so.  

 

Sex isn't only about pro-creation.  Celibacy isn't about not having kids.  Are you simply rejecting marriage, or are you rejecting marriage because you think marriage presents an obligation to haved children?

 

I'm avoiding women and marriage because I don't want to be a father in this lifetime.

Just saying you don't want children doesn't prevent the condom from breaking, where there is sex there is risk.

[Willa]

My best friend adamently did not want children either. She has never changed her mind, even though she is married, and she has never told me why. I imagine in today's world it would be harder on men to pursue this course. I pray that God may comfort you and heal any fears or emotional scars that may have caused this or resulted from your decision. And may He give you strength, health and peace. Willa

[Hall7]

Blessings Everyone,

     I don't know who is going to disagree4(but I can guess-lol)but I think there may be some confusion here about differentiating abstinence from celibacy..................abstinence is simply abstaining from sexual intercourse & celibacy is abstaining from sexual intercourse as a vow(usually religious)not to marry......although the definition for both may be the same (ie:Webster -Miriam),unless of course you have a pre 1908 text

     This is why I gave the examples that I did in my earlier post so that it would explain why I view the true calling as a":gift"......like I said,anyone can choose to make the vow but unless it is their calling,it is usually not without great difficulty(IMO)

Praise the Lord & to God be the Glory!

                                                                                                                             With love-in Christ,Kwik

I Didn't know that now I feel pretty dumb.

[Guest DRS81]

You can always try to find a woman who can't have any kids, not all women want kids.

 

You know how difficult that is to find.

For example, how would you bring that up, at dinner time?

Hey sweetheart, ok you would like the lobster with sauce.

Oh by the way, did you get your tubes tied? haha

Then if she says yes, you're suppose to believer her?