Unequally yoked relationships

[Guest]

I'll just add this to what's already been said:

 

I have known several couples in which one partner ran ahead of the Lord and got married to an unbeliever -- and by their own admission the believer in the relationship was miserable. The marriage was anything but peaceful since husband and wife were pulling in opposite directions and it was a mess. Here's the thing though: part of wisdom is being able to learn from other's mistakes as well as your own. There's good advice here. Please listen.

 

Jesus said that we would know others by their fruit. For example: saved or not, or false teachers. If you are seeing bad fruit, then there is a reason for it. Run. Do not walk. . . if that's what you need to do. Feelings mean nothing. Staying in God's will is everything.

[missmuffet]

If your girlfriend knew Christ and the Words of the Bible she would not ask you to be intimate with her before marriage.It sounds like she is rejecting God's Word that you are telling her.You need to tell her that God loves her and who Jesus Christ is and pray for her a lot.You can not open her heart to Christ only God can do that.She is not a believer.She only told you she was a new Christian to get her hooks into you.That is quite common.The fact that she tried to deceive you and make you think she was a Christian would make me think she has very little character and integrity and that would be another red flag going up.Give this young lady and your relationship with her to God.Ask Him to guide and direct you on this.

 

2 Corinthians 6:14-15  Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?  And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?

[angels4u]

 Hey all,

 I could really use some advice from some strong Christian brothers and sisters. I have been dating my girlfriend now for about 6 months. She said she was a new Christian when we started dating and I was a little concerned because I have been walking for many years now but I was open to her walk as well. A few weeks ago she came to me and told me that she feels rejected because I am not intimate with her. I told her my faith convicts me to save myself for marriage. She understood but still felt like she was being rejected. This started a whole conversation on faith that I was trying to lead but she has a very hard time opening up to me about where she is with God. We were at church on Sunday and the pastor was naturally preaching on dead and alive people through Christ and why his resurrection was so important. It was Easter after all. After the service I could tell something was wrong with her and she told me that she thinks she is still dead. This was alarming to me. I asked her why she felt that way and she said because she hasn’t actually given her life to Christ yet. I smiled and said well there is no better time than now! She replied with, I am just not ready to do that yet. My heart is just not ready. Throughout our relationship I have tried to get her to have bible studies with me and attend small groups but she just doesn’t want to. She keeps telling me I need to stop pushing her to my faith and let her come to it on her own. This concerns me deeply. Is this the point when I break off the relationship because we are not on the same level? Or do I try to lead her down the path? I am very lost on this one. I do have love for her which is clouding my path. Please help me shed some light on this.

Thanks

 

I do understand your problem and you might not like my advice,do not get yoked with a unbeliever because it will give you many problems down the road. It might be hard to break up with her but you are doing the right thing. You will find somebody who does love the Lord. Why not explain to her how you feel ..pray about it and make the decision.

 

Question: "Is it right for a Christian to date or marry a non-Christian?"

Answer:For a Christian, dating a non-Christian is unwise, and marrying one is not an option.Second Corinthians 6:14 (KJV)tells us not to be “unequally yoked” with an unbeliever. The imagery is of two incompatible oxen sharing the same yoke. Instead of working together to pull the load, they would be working against each other. While this passage does not specifically mention marriage, it definitely has implications for marriage. The passage goes on to say that there is no harmony between Christ and Belial (Satan). There can be no spiritual harmony in a marriage between a Christian and a non-Christian. Paul goes on to remind believers that they are the dwelling place of the Holy Spirit, who inhabits their hearts at salvation (2 Corinthians 6:15-17). Because of that, they are to be separate from the world—in the world, but not of the world—and nowhere is that more important than in life’s most intimate relationship—marriage.

The Bible also says, “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character’ (1 Corinthians 15:33). Having any kind of intimate relationship with an unbeliever can quickly turn into something that is a hindrance to your walk with Christ. We are called to evangelize the lost, not be intimate with them. There is nothing wrong with building quality friendships with unbelievers, but that is as far as it should go. If you were dating an unbeliever, what would honestly be your priority, romance or winning a soul for Christ? If you were married to an unbeliever, how would the two of you cultivate a spiritual intimacy in your marriage? How could a quality marriage be built and maintained if you disagree on the most crucial issue in the universe—the Lord Jesus Chris

 

Read more:http://www.gotquestions.org/date-marry-unbeliever.html#ixzz3WxOxyDji

[B3L13v3R]

Welcome  Metavow87

Quote Metavow87: "Is this the point when I break off the relationship because we are not on the same level?"

She's been honest with you. You now know she is not a Christian. It's best to move on as only heart ache comes between an unequally yoked relationship.
You being a Christian, and her not one.

2Co 6:14  Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

Ask for strength in Christ, it's wise to break this off.

Quote Metavow87:"Or do I try to lead her down the path?"

You have already looked to point her in the right direction. At this time, she is not interested as you have clearly said.
Her desire for fornication will continue without Christ. Ask God for strength, and move on. Pray for her salvation, yes, but move on.

Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.
(1Co 6:9-10)

As a Christian, I "was" some of the above in the past. Not looking ever to give that sin opportunity again.

1Co 6:11  And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.

Quote Metavow87:"I do have love for her which is clouding my path."

Our First love is very important, at this point, and every point in the Christians life. If you keep your First love in His proper place, He will give clarity.

Mar 12:30  And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment.
Mar 12:31  And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.

Our family praying for you this evening, and her salvation.

[Holly Hobbie]

My husband and I are not of the same faith anymore and thus considered unequally yoked by some circles.. He is Catholic and I am Baptist.

It is not easy .When  I first married my husband because I thought I could change him and because I thought I would never meet anyone else who "valued" me.

That was a mistake we nearly divorced twice but God gave us two special needs kids an reminded each of us how much they and God needed us.

 

It isn't easy and there has been a lot of heartache in the 18 yrs we have known each other.

I am the spiritual leader in the home and I absolutely hate it......My husband became a Christian when he was 17 after a Billy Graham crusade but fell deep into an addiction that has also helped nearly destroy our marriage I am not saying that your girl friend is anything like my husband just cautioning you about getting involved with someone who is not on the same spiritual wave length.

if your girl friend is not a Christian or is drifting my advice is to encourage her with scripture and prayer if there is no change in her behavior or attitude towards God, Christianity let her go. It may seem easy for me to say this but I live with a man who in many ways himself is running from God and it's hard to stay a strong Christian when I am being dragged down because of my desire to serve God deeper,

[Holly Hobbie]

P,S, I have nothing against Catholics just as long as your serving God.

[missmuffet]

My husband and I are not of the same faith anymore and thus considered unequally yoked by some circles.. He is Catholic and I am Baptist.

It is not easy .When  I first married my husband because I thought I could change him and because I thought I would never meet anyone else who "valued" me.

That was a mistake we nearly divorced twice but God gave us two special needs kids an reminded each of us how much they and God needed us.

 

It isn't easy and there has been a lot of heartache in the 18 yrs we have known each other.

I am the spiritual leader in the home and I absolutely hate it......My husband became a Christian when he was 17 after a Billy Graham crusade but fell deep into an addiction that has also helped nearly destroy our marriage I am not saying that your girl friend is anything like my husband just cautioning you about getting involved with someone who is not on the same spiritual wave length.

if your girl friend is not a Christian or is drifting my advice is to encourage her with scripture and prayer if there is no change in her behavior or attitude towards God, Christianity let her go. It may seem easy for me to say this but I live with a man who in many ways himself is running from God and it's hard to stay a strong Christian when I am being dragged down because of my desire to serve God deeper,

Yes I would consider you and your husband unevenly yoked.

[ShilloAnn]

I am having a similar problem except my relationship is new.  I have started seeing this guy who does not know what he believes.  He says he is not a Christian but he isn't not one either.  I don't know how to help him become a Christian without making him feel like I am pushing him.  I like him a lot though and do not want to give up on our relationship.

[Guest]

Welcome~!

 

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I am having a similar problem except my relationship is new.  I have started seeing this guy who does not know what he believes.  He says he is not a Christian but he isn't not one either.  I don't know how to help him become a Christian without making him feel like I am pushing him.  I like him a lot though and do not want to give up on our relationship.

 

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Praying~!

[Guest shiloh357]

Hi Meta,

 

It's not going to get any easier and the longer you remain in a relationship with an unbeliever who is actively rejecting Christ, you will only find yourself in one argument after another.  Your value system and hers will be completely different as it already is given that she views your commitment to purity as a rejection of her.

 

Save yourself a ton of heartache and stress and look for a committed Christian.   It will tear you up in the flesh, but the long term benefits will infinitely outweigh the short term pain.