I need you guys

[flipflop2234]

Right now I'm kind of freaking out. I am afraid that I do not have the Holy Spirit/ghost. I'm very worried that my repentance is out of fear and that my coming to Christ was not a calling from God, but me trying to save myself. Come to think of it when I did come to God I was very afraid of hell and I still am. There have been times where I have been  filled with joy and happy to serve the Lord because of how overjoyed and sure I was with Peace knowing that I was saved. I have aknowledged that I am a sinner and I need God to forgive me through Jesus's sacrifice on the cross. I know that I have to trust him and have faith in him for my salvation. I believe in Jesus but I can't tell if my belief is real or not, I have faith in Jesus but I don't know if it's real  or not. I've sought to live according to God's will and I've definitely produced some fruit, I've also turned away from a lot of sin in my life and have asked jesus to help me overcome sin daily. I constantly pray to God in prayer thanking him for the trials he puts me through and I hope that this is just one of them. I am worried sick that I do not actually have the Holy Spirit and that all the things that I've been doing have just been my feeble attempts at saving myself and that God has not called me at all but my stupid, mortal, sefish, horrible, sick, twisted mind has lead me to God as a sort of safety net for insurance. I want to be sincere and I want to serve God but I'm just so afraid that he hasn't really called me and the fact that I'm putting so much effort into learning about God, doing what his word says, turning away from sin, and praying to him is just proof that I am not sincere and that my efforts is attempt to overcompensate. I'm crying while writing this because it's so sad to think about god just looking at me shaking his head in disgrace at me because I wasn't one of the elect that he has called to him and he hasn't granted me the gift of repentance and faith for salvation because it's not his will to save me. I know God is sovereign and just to choose who he hardens and who he has mercy but serving to glorify god is extremely hard with the end destination of my fight of faith being second death. I have spread the gospel to people even when I really was embarrassed and scared for awkwardness and even brought my friend to faith in Christ but it's so hard to serve with this constant fear that God condems me. I call on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and God to forgive me and rescue me daily, I aknowledge that I'm sinner daily, I ask God to fill me with the Holy Spirit daily, but I just feel like the fact that I still struggle with the feelings of unrest, uncertainty, and condemnation shows that God has handed me over to my own terrible twisted mind and that my purpose is not to be a child of God, but a vehicle for God's wrath as desribed in romans 9. I go through feelings of not doing enough to please God and that I have to be more  obedient to feelings that I am trusting too much in myself and not enough on grace. I feel horrible and have gone from panic mode to sheer sadness and tears while writing this. Please help me. Tell me the truth about what you all think and not just stuff to make me feel better please. 

[bryan]

It sounds like you've accepted Jesus as your savior and are trying daily to learn more and serve Jesus.  You have the gift of the Holy Ghost, but the hard part now is to develop your relationship with Jesus.  Listen to what you're being asked to do.  If you hear nothing, pray, study scripture, and do your best.  There may be times when you feel like you're under spiritual attack.  By developing more as a Christian, you will become more of a target and be persecuted more.  We're warned of that in scripture.  Keep the faith, keep developing your relationship with Jesus, and serve on.

[angels4u]

Hi Flipflop,

It sounds to me that you did give your heart to Jesus but you don't really trust Him enough to believe that He will be with you in everyday life until the end of your days, that you're worried about not having the Holy Spirit shows that you really love God and that you do have the Holy Spirit.

To live the Christian life is not living by feelings but by every word of God.  

 

The Temptation of Jesus
…3The tempter came to Him and said, “If You are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.” 4ButJesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” 5Then the devil took Him to the holy city and set Him on the pinnacle of the temple.…

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.'"Matthew 4:4
 

Read the Bible and tell God that you do believe in Him and do not listen to the enemy who will make you doubt if you're really saved, claim all the promises you have in God!

Who I am in Christ

 I am Accepted in Christ

John 1:12I am God's child

John 15:15I am Christ's friend

Romans 5:1I have been justified

! Cor 6:17I am united with the Lord and one with Him in spirit

1 Cor 6:20I have been bought with a price, I belong to God

1 Cor 12:27I am a member of Christ's body

Ephesians 1:1I am a saint

Ephesians 1:5I have been adopted as God's child

Ephesians 2:18I have direct access to God through the Holy Spirit

Colossians 1:14I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins

Colossians 2:10I am complete in Christ

   I am Secure in Christ

Romans 8:1-2I am free forever from condemnation

Romans 8:28I am assured that all things work together for good

Rom 8:33-34I am free from any condemning charges against me

Romans 8:35I cannot be separated from the love of God

2 Cor 1:21I have been established anointed and sealed by God

Colossians 3:3I am hidden with Christ in God

Philippians 1:6I am confident that the good work God has begun in me will be perfected

Phil 3:20I am a citizen of heaven

2 Timothy 1:7I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power love and a sound mind

Hebrews 4:16I can find grace and mercy in time of need

1 John 5:18I am born of God and the evil one cannot touch me

   I Am Significant in Christ

Matt5:13-14I am the salt and light of the earth

John 15:1,5I am a branch of the true vine, a channel of His life

John 15:16I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit

Acts 1:8I am a personal witness of Christ's

1 Cor 3:16I am God's temple

2 Cor 5:17-20I am a minister of reconciliation

2 Cor 6:1I am God's co-worker

Ephesisans 2:6I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realm

Ephesians 2:10I am God's workmanship

Ephesians 3:12I may approach God with freedom and confidence

Philippians 4:13I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me

Taken from Living Free in Christ, by Neil Anderson ©1993 Regal Books

 

Flipflop,I hope this helps you to understand that you can and must trust God? 

[OneLight]

Well, if you have accept Christ as your Savior, you have been sealed with the Holy Spirit.  Oppressed is another issue.  Remember doubt is the most used weapon of the enemy.  You need to realize that you are in the middle of a spiritual warfare.  We don't chose when Satan is going to attack, we just need to recognize the attack and put on the whole armor of God.

Romans 10:13 For “whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved.”

Ephesians 1:13-14 "In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, 14 who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory."

Ephesians 6:10-18 "Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.  Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.  For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.  Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness,  and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one.  And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints—"

[JTC]

21 hours ago, flipflop2234 said:

 Tell me the truth about what you all think and not just stuff to make me feel better please. 

Hi Flipflop, Firstly I think if you weren't really saved you wouldn't be worried about this. A faker would just fake it when he was around other Christians and not care when he was alone. I think you're a young person and self doubt is part of being young. Most teenagers even think they're crazy, and that's part of being a teenager. A truly crazy person never thinks he's crazy. He thinks everyone else is. So going along with my youthfulness theory I think you're over eager to become a spiritually mature believer over night. It takes time my friend. I just listened to a very informative sermon on this topic by Ralph Drollinger on the oneplace website. You should listen to it I think you'll feel better. I think you're ok and I think you're going to grow into a Christian most people don't even want to be. I'll even say I wish more believers were as concerned as you are about being genuine. The whole body of Christ would be better off.

 

 

[NOONE7]

On 5/27/2017 at 3:56 PM, bryan said:

It sounds like you've accepted Jesus as your savior and are trying daily to learn more and serve Jesus.  You have the gift of the Holy Ghost, but the hard part now is to develop your relationship with Jesus.  Listen to what you're being asked to do.  If you hear nothing, pray, study scripture, and do your best.  There may be times when you feel like you're under spiritual attack.  By developing more as a Christian, you will become more of a target and be persecuted more.  We're warned of that in scripture.  Keep the faith, keep developing your relationship with Jesus, and serve on.

Great advice bryan!

[Guest shiloh357]

On 5/27/2017 at 5:32 PM, flipflop2234 said:

Right now I'm kind of freaking out. I am afraid that I do not have the Holy Spirit/ghost.

If you were not a believer, you would not care if you had the Holy Spirit or not.  The fact that you are concerned is evidence that you are saved.

Quote

I'm very worried that my repentance is out of fear and that my coming to Christ was not a calling from God, but me trying to save myself. Come to think of it when I did come to God I was very afraid of hell and I still am.

Nothing wrong with not going to Hell.   Jesus died on the cross so that we would not end up spending eternity in Hell.  God doesn't want you to go to hell.   So there is nothing wrong with agreeing with God that you don't want to spend eternity in Hell.  It's not a sin to want for yourself the things that God wants you to have.  In this case, God wants to be with Him for eternity.   You want that too, right?

 

Quote

There have been times where I have been  filled with joy and happy to serve the Lord because of how overjoyed and sure I was with Peace knowing that I was saved. I have aknowledged that I am a sinner and I need God to forgive me through Jesus's sacrifice on the cross. I know that I have to trust him and have faith in him for my salvation.

Then you have done everything required for salvation. You have trusted in Jesus.

 

Quote

I believe in Jesus but I can't tell if my belief is real or not, I have faith in Jesus but I don't know if it's real  or not. I've sought to live according to God's will and I've definitely produced some fruit, I've also turned away from a lot of sin in my life and have asked jesus to help me overcome sin daily. I constantly pray to God in prayer thanking him for the trials he puts me through and I hope that this is just one of them. I am worried sick that I do not actually have the Holy Spirit and that all the things that I've been doing have just been my feeble attempts at saving myself and that God has not called me at all but my stupid, mortal, sefish, horrible, sick, twisted mind has lead me to God as a sort of safety net for insurance.

We all go through dry spells in our Christian walk.  All of us feel closer to the Lord at times and then not at other times.   The Christian life is a war against the flesh and sometimes we win the battles and sometimes the flesh wins the battles.   But that has no bearing on God's love or your salvation.    God doesn't love us or save us because we are good, but because HE is good.  

Quote

I want to be sincere and I want to serve God but I'm just so afraid that he hasn't really called me and the fact that I'm putting so much effort into learning about God, doing what his word says, turning away from sin, and praying to him is just proof that I am not sincere and that my efforts is attempt to overcompensate.

Stop and think about that for a second...    If you were not saved, you would not want to serve God.   You are putting out a lot of effort to learning about God, cooperating with His commandments, turning from sin and praying...   How is that proof you are not sincere?   That makes no sense.  If you were not sincere, you would not be putting out any effort  to live for the Lord in the first place.   Insincere Christians get "saved" and then live as they please, rather than pleasing God.   So it makes no sense to say that your efforts to be a sincere believer prove that you are insincere.   It's self-defeating logic.

The Christian life isn't easy and it cannot be lived out in our strength alone.   But if anything this post only highlights the sincerity of your faith.

 

 

[Absolem]

Its never not good to study the bible, turn away from sin and pray.

How are you doing with sin? 1 john 5:13 talks about knowing that you have eternal life. Examine yourself. Are you walking after the spirit truely and not after the flesh?  Like really how do you do with sin. Do you control your thoughts when seeing a pretty girl? Do you speak up and give the money that was dropped back to the owner, etc. This is important.

[Neighbor]

On 5/27/2017 at 6:32 PM, flipflop2234 said:

Right now I'm kind of freaking out. I am afraid that I do not have the Holy Spirit/ghost. I'm very worried that my repentance is out of fear and that my coming to Christ was not a calling from God, but me trying to save myself. Come to think of it when I did come to God I was very afraid of hell and I still am. There have been times where I have been  filled with joy and happy to serve the Lord because of how overjoyed and sure I was with Peace knowing that I was saved. I have aknowledged that I am a sinner and I need God to forgive me through Jesus's sacrifice on the cross. I know that I have to trust him and have faith in him for my salvation. I believe in Jesus but I can't tell if my belief is real or not, I have faith in Jesus but I don't know if it's real  or not. I've sought to live according to God's will and I've definitely produced some fruit, I've also turned away from a lot of sin in my life and have asked jesus to help me overcome sin daily. I constantly pray to God in prayer thanking him for the trials he puts me through and I hope that this is just one of them. I am worried sick that I do not actually have the Holy Spirit and that all the things that I've been doing have just been my feeble attempts at saving myself and that God has not called me at all but my stupid, mortal, sefish, horrible, sick, twisted mind has lead me to God as a sort of safety net for insurance. I want to be sincere and I want to serve God but I'm just so afraid that he hasn't really called me and the fact that I'm putting so much effort into learning about God, doing what his word says, turning away from sin, and praying to him is just proof that I am not sincere and that my efforts is attempt to overcompensate. I'm crying while writing this because it's so sad to think about god just looking at me shaking his head in disgrace at me because I wasn't one of the elect that he has called to him and he hasn't granted me the gift of repentance and faith for salvation because it's not his will to save me. I know God is sovereign and just to choose who he hardens and who he has mercy but serving to glorify god is extremely hard with the end destination of my fight of faith being second death. I have spread the gospel to people even when I really was embarrassed and scared for awkwardness and even brought my friend to faith in Christ but it's so hard to serve with this constant fear that God condems me. I call on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and God to forgive me and rescue me daily, I aknowledge that I'm sinner daily, I ask God to fill me with the Holy Spirit daily, but I just feel like the fact that I still struggle with the feelings of unrest, uncertainty, and condemnation shows that God has handed me over to my own terrible twisted mind and that my purpose is not to be a child of God, but a vehicle for God's wrath as desribed in romans 9. I go through feelings of not doing enough to please God and that I have to be more  obedient to feelings that I am trusting too much in myself and not enough on grace. I feel horrible and have gone from panic mode to sheer sadness and tears while writing this. Please help me. Tell me the truth about what you all think and not just stuff to make me feel better please. 

Hi, Three things to remember as a start so that you may relax a little bit in your walk with Jesus:

First; God is not a trickster.

Second, God is not a trickster.

 Third God is not a trickster.

You are doing a fine job  parroting all the basic things of God in the finest Calvinist tradition, BUT you are ahead of yourself. Please please, allow yourself a tiny bit of room for credit, just a tiny tiny bit at least. Stop calling yourself such terrible names!  Self flagellation is not necessary in order to have the Holy Spirit, nor to know Jesus is your Lord and savior.  It is not a virtue either. My wife and I use a term for what you are doing to yourself, we call it self-meanification.

For your well being, may I suggest that  for awhile at least that you  embrace one part of the picture you have not yet mentioned about God as you tick off, predestination, foreknowledge, total depravity, etc. That is that  Jesus does not lose a one. Not a one! Hold on to what Jesus said for you to hear even today, "And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day."  Allow yourself to relax, be calm and enjoy  the awesome security that you have in Jesus.

Edited May 31, 2017 by Neighbor

[Estrella]

First of all, i have to thank you flipflop for posing this question. I am facing this exact same situation like you. All those fear, questions and doubt. It was only yesterday that i blurted out to someone about almost similar things of all that you have pointed out. From what you have explained above, you are so much braver and stronger than i am i would say.  I too struggle everyday wondering if i am actually a choosen one at all...i mean sometimes i feel like whatever i do is actually pointless like...who cares anyway? Like whatever i do i probably never measure up like when i see how others have done so much for God, i feel what i do is just peanuts. Sometimes i wonder if it is my own fantasy thoughts, or just a wishful thinking or just me comforting myself to think God actually think i matter at all. I tend to overthink and when i do, i get panic attacks and i freak out and cry my eyes out - in silence....it is agonizing to be going through this. In my head there is like a war thats going on...it feels like something is controlling my mind that it feels laden with heavy burden. I then tend to seek for "temporal" relief like google for youtube for testimonies or songs or anything that could just help me calm down. But again i start to wonder if it is my own doing instead of God. There were/are many times i even beg Jesus to reveal Himself so that i could have the assurance. Like i know and realise the bible verses regarding doubt and etc.. i could quote all of them..but it is so hard to apply and to be steadfast in God... to trust that it is His doing and not mine. It is certainly easy to quote scriptures (even the devil knows the scriptures and quote them) but to apply and trust them is ... anothet issue in itself. 

At the same time, i also realize that the devil often uses the mind to wage war. This is nothing new for me for i have been fighting this battle since the time i wanted to seek Christ about 12 years ago. I faced a lot of distractions external and internally....and i am still fighting till this day. Therefore, know that you are not alone in this and i know exactly what you are going through. And with you posting this question, it has indirectly helped me too for i just didnt know how to even describe them..but you did it for me as well.

"Be still and know that i am God" is the hardest thing to do. My mind is all over... it is hard to keep it "still".