Very confused, need some advice.

[Justin9228]

Forgive me in advance if this is not an appropriate place to post this. Hello everybody, my name is Justin. I'm 26 years old. I grew up in a family that I wouldn't really call religious. I remember we attended church only a few times growing up and never practiced any prayer. My father is an athiest and my mother is a believer as of recently after my parents divorced and now attends church regularly but does not take it as seriously as she could. This means I am not baptized.    My life thus far has been filled with disappointment and loneliness. I constantly feel like I'm missing a big important piece of my life. I struggle with severe depression and anxiety. I have always tried to think logically. I dont believe something if I dont have proof. I spend a lot of time doubting and wondering why. This in turn has led me down a path of atheism. It has always been hard for me to believe in god when I never had proof.  However, lately I have been even questioning this. Are my issues caused because I dont have faith? Are these misfortunes and woes in my life because the devil has had too big of an impact on my life so far? I watched a documentary on YouTube the other day of a man who claims to have passed away and was sent to hell after meeting with god because his whole life he had been an atheist. He then went into great detail of the horrors he expierence in the short time he spent in hell. God gave him a second chance at life and was revived in the hospital. This scared me deeply. I've always been a good person and always tried to do the right thing. I have a great amount of empathy for people and dont like to hurt peoples feelings. But I will still be sent to hell for not building a relationship with god? Life is a test and am I failing so far? I just have so much confusion. I want very badly to build a relationship with god and have faith and turn over a new leaf. But how do I start? Am I just being scared into it because I dont want to go to hell? I feel like the fact that I'm even having these thoughts is enough proof to have faith because I feel like something is missing in my life. Is that god? Or am I being selfish? I just dont know... My question at the end of the day is that if I want to change my thinking habits and the doubt part of my thoughts, Where do I start? How can I rid myself of the devils thoughts that hes been putting in my head my whole life. thoughts like (god is not real, there is no proof, when you die you just die). How can I start this new relationship with god and be forgiven for the doubts I've had.I kind of worry I'll always have doubts. Is that normal? Please, would really like some advice. Thank you all so much and I hope you guys have a great day. 

[BeauJangles]

Hi Justin, 

Looking at your post, and my there's so many questions! So, you have some concerns about where you might spend eternity, and this is a good starting place. Wish I could answer them to your satisfaction, but am in hopes that seeking will result in finding Christ as your Saviour. Keep searching. Attend church with your mom, and get into some fellowship with the college age there, if this is possible.

Get a bible translation that is easy enough for your understanding, and read it. I would recommend the New Testament first. Then the doubts will melt away, and into some faith that you're in desperate need of. God bless you, Justin. Keep posting. Just a couple more, and be welcomed to Worthy. Hang in there, Jesus wants to fulfill your life. Let Him do that. Know that you're in my prayers. 

Shalom, 

David/BeauJangles 

Edited March 11, 2019 by BeauJangles

[Willa]

I was like you but an agnostic.  I believed there had to be an original force that created all this, but it was not personal.  Then God revealed Himself to me as a God Who heard and answered my prayers.  Start by praying God, if there is a God, I want to know You.  I want to believe in you.  Please help me.  

[Blood Bought 1953]

7 hours ago, Justin9228 said:

Forgive me in advance if this is not an appropriate place to post this. Hello everybody, my name is Justin. I'm 26 years old. I grew up in a family that I wouldn't really call religious. I remember we attended church only a few times growing up and never practiced any prayer. My father is an athiest and my mother is a believer as of recently after my parents divorced and now attends church regularly but does not take it as seriously as she could. This means I am not baptized.    My life thus far has been filled with disappointment and loneliness. I constantly feel like I'm missing a big important piece of my life. I struggle with severe depression and anxiety. I have always tried to think logically. I dont believe something if I dont have proof. I spend a lot of time doubting and wondering why. This in turn has led me down a path of atheism. It has always been hard for me to believe in god when I never had proof.  However, lately I have been even questioning this. Are my issues caused because I dont have faith? Are these misfortunes and woes in my life because the devil has had too big of an impact on my life so far? I watched a documentary on YouTube the other day of a man who claims to have passed away and was sent to hell after meeting with god because his whole life he had been an atheist. He then went into great detail of the horrors he expierence in the short time he spent in hell. God gave him a second chance at life and was revived in the hospital. This scared me deeply. I've always been a good person and always tried to do the right thing. I have a great amount of empathy for people and dont like to hurt peoples feelings. But I will still be sent to hell for not building a relationship with god? Life is a test and am I failing so far? I just have so much confusion. I want very badly to build a relationship with god and have faith and turn over a new leaf. But how do I start? Am I just being scared into it because I dont want to go to hell? I feel like the fact that I'm even having these thoughts is enough proof to have faith because I feel like something is missing in my life. Is that god? Or am I being selfish? I just dont know... My question at the end of the day is that if I want to change my thinking habits and the doubt part of my thoughts, Where do I start? How can I rid myself of the devils thoughts that hes been putting in my head my whole life. thoughts like (god is not real, there is no proof, when you die you just die). How can I start this new relationship with god and be forgiven for the doubts I've had.I kind of worry I'll always have doubts. Is that normal? Please, would really like some advice. Thank you all so much and I hope you guys have a great day. 

 

“Nobody can come to God lest the Spirit draw him”..... I used to be an atheist.....For no good reason, other than God’s amazing Grace, The Holy Spirit came into my life one night and opened my eyes to the fact that I had been living in a fool’s Paradise.....Satan fooled me as he has fooled practically the entire world.....I was living the sin and lie of self righteousness.....the one that says...  “I may not be perfect, but I’m good enough to get to Heaven- Hell is for all those guys in the Penitentiary , the murderers, the rapists,etc” God allowed me to see my actual state in His Holy Eyes. I was nothing but a wretched, lost , Hell-Deserving Sinner.The Law Of God had done its job in my life. It shut my mouth.All I was left to say was “ Lord, have mercy on me ,a sinner”.This is where you need to be.This is the true Repentance that God demands for Salvation.Repent from the sin of self- righteousness .You seem to be a sincere person whose consciousness is starting to be pricked by the Holy Spirit—- THAT is where it all begins. God is not interested in your puny attempts at perfection.He wants you to trust in the perfect performance of His Son which included shedding His Blood to cover ALL of your sins.Forever.Jesus takes your sins and in turn gives you His perfection.All you have to do is trust Him.He wants your faith. Faith is taking a promise of God and acting on it.There’s no better place to get started than with this promise—-“ Turn to Me and I will turn to you” All He asks is that you “ come to Him”. It is important that you get started with a good foundation .I strongly recommend this site as a place to get well grounded in the faith.......getgodsgift .org .God bless you— you are in my prayers.

 

[SisterActs2]

Hello Justin9228

You have had some wonderful answers already.  I just wanted to add:

Around your age (I was 25) I began my search for the truth as everything had become boring and mundane in my life and I was looking for answers, just like you.  I spent 2 years wondering how to find the truth.  Unbeknownst to me, God was working through the power of the Holy Spirit to bring me to Him.

By the time I turned 27, through certain things happening (I met several people along the way who somehow, randomly it seemed, resulted in my going to church).  I met another woman my age who, when I told her my story, said "You've tried everything else, why don't you come to church with me next Sunday?"  I collected her and off we went.  Well, while other people were singing the truth just hit me!  A voice (not audible) said to me "JESUS CHRIST IS THE TRUTH".  Seriously, it hit me like a thunderbolt!  I knew this was God speaking to me - somehow - I just knew.

I left that small group of people that day and went home with a tract.  On the back of the tract was something called "The sinner's prayer".  I prayed that prayer and God came into my life.  There was no mistaking it.  My whole life changed.  I have been living, walking, talking, praying, loving and serving my Lord for 41 years now.  Dear seeker - come to Jesus.  Bring Him all your confusion, guilt, sin and bundle of problems.  Tell Him, as you have been told above, that you want to receive Him as your Saviour and Lord.  Say "Lord, I ask your forgiveness for everything I have ever done wrong, including thinking that I could ever get to heaven through any effort I have made."  What we need to understand is that we can never get there through our own merit; it's not about what we do - it's about what Jesus has done!  Salvation comes through faith alone, by the grace of God (Eph. 2:8,9).  Repentance, when you learn about it, is absolutely necessary too.

If you need more help, a lot of caring people here can answer any more questions you have.  You need to pray and ask God, Who I believe is drawing you, to lead you to the right church/people where you can flourish as a new Christian; learn and grow into the man God wants you to be.

Love in Jesus' Name, SA2