Does forgiving someone mean that you have to continue to be friends/to communicate with them?

[Your closest friendnt]

17 minutes ago, leah777 said:

can you give scripture for that please?

Luke 17: 

3 Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him.

4 And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him. 

[missmuffet]

4 hours ago, Your closest friendnt said:

We have to address the issue of"dederant" ...

Not to encourage the offender to keep doing the same offense over and over again...

This is in  matters between us...of one to another...in general....

When has someone offended (you)...the issue is not only to forgive or not to forgive...but when to forgive if one has to forgive....

Not to look in one self and say I have forgive "I am ok"...this is ok...not to say quickly something against that and people quickly "tear up their clothes"...going into the "righteous indignation "...

So I want to comment you for inquiring...

The issue is also about the offender, to realize that he has done something wrong and he has propose to him self to avoid repeating it...that would be ok...but there is a duty place upon the wise of how to help him in his rehabilitation and  ot to encourage him with leniency to become a repeat offender...

We are holding our forgiveness till the time the offender has earn the right to be forgiven...

With his repentance and steps taken towards his rehabilitation...

If not and we quickly forgive out of self reasons not to feel polluted with unforgivness we may encourage the repetition of the offense...

When we hold are forgiveness for the right time...we are not poluted..on the other hand we pursue the rehabilitation of the other party...or the least no to be seen by him/her as a license to do the same thing all over again....

"To remember that the other people are not as we are...they maybe tricky...intising to elicit forgiveness from someone.   

**the instructions about forgiveness..it also includes not to take matters in your own hands...or to take the Law in our own hands...

Not to think that we are in the Law of Moses and God and go out and kill our adulterous husband..

(If you were not a woman but a man...without prejudice I would have said "our adulterous wife...or to be politically correct...I sould have to say....OUR PARTNER IN LIFE...

Not to go out and kill the "rapist" believing we are on a mission from God...

Hope I was accountable to your inquiry...

Jesus teach in the same lines....

 

The Bible only tells us to forgive. There are no exceptions. 

Ephesians 4:32

And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

 

[Your closest friendnt]

3 hours ago, missmuffet said:

The Bible only tells us to forgive. There are no exceptions. 

Ephesians 4:32

And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

 

Paul is this context is addressing situations between friends...and he most probably is telling them not to hold grudges towards one another...

"Be Kind to one another, tenderhearted, 

Forgiving one another"

The language is referring to  friends, people who know one another...

Paul is not saying to 

"Be Kind to one another, tenderhearted, 

To someone who has done a serious offense to you ot to a member of your family...someone who threatens you with assault and is harassing you....you do not want to make it easy to be a repeat offender...

[TheBlade]

Hmm.. do we truly forgive them as if it what they did never took place? And "We are holding our forgiveness till the time the offender has earn the right to be forgiven" <--thats a personal choice and will come with a very high price.

If (when it happens) I forgive I treat them as if they never did it. To not talk to them be friends (if it was something we were before).. I still will. I know of what I speak. There are things done so .. anyway the enemy reminds us of what so and so did. The cost of not truly forgiving costs us. Always puts something between us and God. Christ .. man what He went through. ALL of what people said and did is not in the word. And yet on the cross said.. Father forgive them.. for they don't know what they are doing.

Forgiveness/love go hand in hand. We are free to some degree.. so to remember yet say we forgive? No.. to forgive and treat them as if they never wronged hurt you. We expect GOD to do it huh and He does. They will know you are mine by your love one for another. Look at all those that GOD loves. People we would never be around talk to.. evil.. do such evil things.. those are the ones He came to save.

[Who me]

Everyone ignores Luke 17:3+4. Forgiveness is only given when there is repentance.

Only pharisees added more to the Bible then Christians do today.

How does God forgive? Is it a blanket forgiveness with no need to say sorry. How did the Israelites obtain forgiveness for sins, didn't they have to pay there hand on the head of their sacrifice for sin, indicating both their repentance and the passing of guilt etc to the offering.

We have to be willing to forgive and that does mean maintaining close fellowship with the brother who has offended you and pleaded for forgiveness 77 X 7 times, literally an unlimited number of times.

 

Jesus being crucified, did not forgive, he prayed to he Father that he would forgive them, but it was all in God's hands and if they did not repent. Oh dear.

 

That is also what we do if someone will not or cannot say sorry. We pass it all over to God for him to deal with our feelings as well as the offender.

 

 

[Guest]

This exact question troubles me too. 

I pray to be able to forgive those who hurt me. But i also ask that they be kept away from me! I hope that is not wrong. I see nothing productive about forcing yourself to remain in contact with destructive negative people. 

 

[Who me]

10 hours ago, Melinda12 said:

This exact question troubles me too. 

I pray to be able to forgive those who hurt me. But i also ask that they be kept away from me! I hope that is not wrong. I see nothing productive about forcing yourself to remain in contact with destructive negative people. 

 Tho

Why do you pray for something that is unbiblical.

God only forgave you when you repented. Have those who hurt you said sorry and meant it? If they haven't and you have pointed out to them there hurt to yourself, then you do not have to forgive them, all you need to do is like Jesus being crucified is pass it all over to God. Pass everything, the incident, there attitude, your hurt and feelings etc etc and ask God to deal with it all.

Then you pray for them. Pray seriously and regularly or there benefit.

 

It is often easier to be unbiblical and seek to forgive them.

[BeauJangles]

On 7/26/2020 at 1:10 PM, Your closest friendnt said:

Some time we do not have to forgive..

We can choose whether or not to forgive. Choosing not to forgive will result in a root of bitterness and end as a defilement of ourselves. At that point, it can permeate our entire being. Many people end up old and bitter. That's poisonous to our soul and can destroy us. 

Hebrews 12:14-17 KJV ¹⁴Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the LORD: ¹⁵Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, thereby be defiled; ¹⁶Lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright. ¹⁷For ye know how that afterward, when he would have inherited the blessing, he was rejected: for he found no place of repentance, though he sought it carefully with tears.

[Guest]

5 hours ago, Who me said:

Why do you pray for something that is unbiblical.

God only forgave you when you repented. Have those who hurt you said sorry and meant it? If they haven't and you have pointed out to them there hurt to yourself, then you do not have to forgive them, all you need to do is like Jesus being crucified is pass it all over to God. Pass everything, the incident, there attitude, your hurt and feelings etc etc and ask God to deal with it all.

Then you pray for them. Pray seriously and regularly or there benefit.

 

It is often easier to be unbiblical and seek to forgive them.

There are people who hurt me terribly. I have forgiven them in my heart and moved on though they have not ever said sorry. Such people refuse to repent but that is their problem. 

I see no reason to have anything to do with them now. Why inflict their company on to myself and leave myself open to them again?

Even Jesus said if you are not received in a place, by stubborn folk, shake the dust off your sandals and go. 

 

[Your closest friendnt]

On 8/6/2020 at 1:08 PM, BeauJangles said:

We can choose whether or not to forgive. Choosing not to forgive will result in a root of bitterness and end as a defilement of ourselves. At that point, it can permeate our entire being. Many people end up old and bitter. That's poisonous to our soul and can destroy us. 

Hebrews 12:14-17 KJV ¹⁴Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the LORD: ¹⁵Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, thereby be defiled; ¹⁶Lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright. ¹⁷For ye know how that afterward, when he would have inherited the blessing, he was rejected: for he found no place of repentance, though he sought it carefully with tears.

I understand your concern and I would agree with your concern if I had said...

That the reason not to forgive is to have the chance to plan our revenge...or to hold on to our hate....things like that...

What I meant is that in specific situations we have to weight in to forgive or not to forgive for the greater benefit of all...

Not necessarily to nourish hatred or a root of bitterness...it does not have to be that way by DEFAULT when one decides not to forgive...

And it will depends...

At times someone is done something wrong in knowledge...and not only they do not intend to look into to it...that's what they want...and they are proud of it...

And they plan to do it and have done it in the past to others and teach others to do the same..

You have to leave those people to the Lord or the authorities...so justice can be done to the victims...if not we are going to have more victims...and we do not want to look like we Condon these acts of injustice...thief's must be stopped as crooked people...

Quick to forgive does more harm than good...builds bad caracters...

If someone is a friend...it's different...you forgive without discussion..when you know people are self corrected...or talk about it later on...

Do not make it a big deal...

When someone say water under the bridge...we do not humiliate...we forgive immediately...do not embarrassed...accept also a cilent apology...

Nothing is black and white...

Even the scriptures say...both good and bad are with everyone...and we need to leave the "bad" and cling to the good...

To clean out ourselves from bitterness and grudges...some times we need to show someone a mood...that's what they need to get the message...