Opting out of Christmas Gift Giving

[Vine Abider]

The kids are long out of the house, so my wife and I decided to opt-out of the whole Christmas gift giving thing around 15 years ago, and we haven't looked back!  It doesn't mean we're rigidly adamant about this, but we're simply released from the often onerous expectation of this annual activity.  The savings in time, money and effort are huge, but the biggest benefit, by far, has been all the associated stress.

We both found it was stressful trying to figure out what people wanted/needed etc., and then trying to find it and make it a surprise.  You may call us selfish, but this stress far outweighed the pleasure of seeing someone get whatever it was.  And dare I say it - the routine just didn't feel genuine or rewarding any more.

Occasionally people still get us a gift at Christmas, but we much rather have the pleasure of their company.  Looking back, we feel it is overall, one of the best decisions we've made!

Of course, the downside of doing this is that the US economy may collapse if it caught on widespread . . .

So has anyone else made that leap?

[missmuffet]

45 minutes ago, Vine Abider said:

The kids are long out of the house, so my wife and I decided to opt-out of the whole Christmas gift giving thing around 15 years ago, and we haven't looked back!  It doesn't mean we're rigidly adamant about this, but we're simply released from the often onerous expectation of this annual activity.  The savings in time, money and effort are huge, but the biggest benefit, by far, has been all the associated stress.

We both found it was stressful trying to figure out what people wanted/needed etc., and then trying to find it and make it a surprise.  You may call us selfish, but this stress far outweighed the pleasure of seeing someone get whatever it was.  And dare I say it - the routine just didn't feel genuine or rewarding any more.

Occasionally people still get us a gift at Christmas, but we much rather have the pleasure of their company.  Looking back, we feel it is overall, one of the best decisions we've made!

Of course, the downside of doing this is that the US economy may collapse if it caught on widespread . . .

So has anyone else made that leap?

Good idea. It has been found that there is a lot of competition in families of who gives the best and most expensive gift. Isn't giving a gift all about giving?

[ayin jade]

We made that leap years ago mostly. My husband feels compelled to get sisters and brother something so we get dates from a local date ranch (they are really good). Other than that we do not even get ourselves anything. Instead we take the time to spend quality time doing fun things. For instance, this past weekend we went to a local city event where we wandered around looking at lights and trying some flower flavored cookies. We also went on a mile of lights display. My husband wants to go to a local place and have hot cocoa. Just an evening out at a local coffeeshop.

[Selah7]

33 minutes ago, ayin jade said:

We made that leap years ago mostly. My husband feels compelled to get sisters and brother something so we get dates from a local date ranch (they are really good). Other than that we do not even get ourselves anything. Instead we take the time to spend quality time doing fun things. For instance, this past weekend we went to a local city event where we wandered around looking at lights and trying some flower flavored cookies. We also went on a mile of lights display. My husband wants to go to a local place and have hot cocoa. Just an evening out at a local coffeeshop.

That seems like a merry thing to do. I'd love to locate a cozy coffee shop that plays live folk music. … or watch a Messiah performance. … perhaps attend a holiday production like The Nutcracker.  

Edited December 2, 2022 by Selah7

[missmuffet]

If there are children in a family it may be a good idea to give gifts only to them. If a person lives in a large family sometimes they draw names. 

[TheBlade]

"smile" Praise God glory to Jesus our Father/Christ never took that leap. Yes lol yes I know what your talking about. For us its always been about giving not receiving. Never been about a "birthday" its about celebrating the messiah. My/our Father always gives. Its always about thinking of others first never self. Its never a obligation.. if that was it I would never give. I Never give to get, yet with my Father I always expect to receive. Know He will never go against our will. Not sure some will understand what I mean there. 

I guess its how we see it. When I was young told my mom I would never charge anyone to hear me sing. She said "you want to deprive/deny them of a blessing?" It was true. Were blessed when we give no matter what "day" time it is. Someone does not want anything praise God. Fact were never going to say that to God who always gives. Its odd we do things that are no evil yet not quite written. Well no birthdays.. as if "its not written" so they never did? Thats not true. Then celebrating the birth of Christ. We really believe God does nothing? We celebrate give to each other and we believe God just sits back does nothing? He loves to give also. Its just He will not go against our will. Don't believe me.. ask Him. In heaven all you will here is "what do want just ask". We walk on streets of gold. Giving never came from man but God. 

But what some want to do on that or any day.. between them nothing. For me ..  its not day about me but Him and giving to others. There comes this joy great joy to give to others or to spouse. I am like some here I don't want anything...oh but if they want to give praise GOD  I will not say a word. They get blessed by giving. Kinda got caught up here sorry. NEVER meant to offend. I understand how that day got twisted and some times you don't want to even think about it. That part I don't listen to any more. Its not about me what I want of feel. Every day is Xmas

Edited December 2, 2022 by TheBlade

[Sower]

1 hour ago, TheBlade said:

For us its always been about giving not receiving.

That was a great one, Blade.

My wife and I grew up in a traditional Christmas celebration. We have also downsized the gift-o-mania. But we do enjoy making a special gift, hand made only (made in the USA) for each other. My wife gives me my favorite FOOD, yeah,  treats and desserts etc (home made peach/strawberry ice cream). I continually create a new bird feeder, trying to out do the last years one. But with a dozen grand kids, she really enjoys finding that special something just for each one to brighten their day. I think it is like Blade said, it is about giving. Jesus gave his life. He loved us. We love, and we also desire to give. It feels good. Remembering when we were kids and the presents were scarce. It is better to give than receive. I understand. For God so loved the world He gave.....

[Vine Abider]

@Sower @TheBlade @missmuffet @Selah7 @ayin jade God is the most awesome giver, to be sure.  I appreciate hearing all the wonderful times people have with giving various things - nice experiences!  I guess what I'm really talking about here is what I would consider on the more commercialized side of Christmas.  That is something that not doing the "quasi-mandatory" gift giving has freed us from. 

Of course, there are many other types of giving, and I must say that my wife is much better in that respect than me.

[Dennis1209]

If your name was not attached to it. I would say it was written by me. 

[Marathoner]

I must confess that holiday fare is a mystery to me. Many reasons colluded to make that a reality where I'm concerned, seeing as how I avoided all the trappings of holidays whenever I could during childhood. I would run outdoors when the opportunity presented itself and not return for as long as I could manage. There were very good reasons behind that.

Giving is something we do on a daily basis anyway, which is why I don't observe this season like others do. I'm happy to work additional hours at the shelter so my colleagues are free to spend time with their friends and family. Why not? I have no family, so it's not a burden by any means. Let them enjoy it... there's nothing wrong with doing so.

How we are raised has a big impact upon life down the road.