Fulfilling biblical male and female roles

[1peterlight]

I just want to discuss the roles of men and women in the bible and in marriages and as parents. I am very disappointed with how far astray these roles have ventured in society. If you are a woman who takes pride in your family first and foremost instead of pursuing a career or getting your me time in then you are a 'doormat'. You must be deppressed. You must be weak minded. You give women a bad name. If you are a man who desires a woman to take care of family and home, and want to be the provider/head of house, you're a sexist pig. You must be controlling. You must be abusive. You give men a bad name. I find a great deal of joy in trying to live up to my biblical role, and I find that is has a beautiful symmetry with my husband as himself in his role. I just wanted to share because I know there are others who find satisfaction in being a biblical complement to your spouse and fulfilling the biblical role to your children and don't feel oppressed or criminalized.

So what is the Biblical role of men and women?

[wingnut-]

I think the biblical model of marriage is a beautiful thing. It requires love and selflessness, two things society opposes or perhaps doesn't understand.

[gdemoss]

Things will be changing in the near future and roles will be lived out as intended without all the confusion. There is a reason for the end of the age of grace, where the millennial kingdom comes in to set the world aright. Confused gender roles plays a very significant part in that ushering in of the kingdom.

God said it would be hard for women (Gen 3:16). And when Christ came he upped the ante for men as well. I am like you in that I enjoy seeking to fulfill my biblical mandate to be a man (husband, father, son, nephew and all other relationships involved in being a man) and seek everyday to do what I can to live in the Spirit fulfilling my assignment. Unfortunately there are not a lot of others out there who share the ideals of scripture of what a man or woman's role is to be.

Due to the fact that we live in a world dominated by sin, we have to settle for that which falls short of the mark. Instead of being able to live out our roles perfectly, we have to seek to be righteous in an unrighteous world. Ideally each gender would be able to simply live inside of their God assigned roles but when a partner chooses to chuck their role and do what their hearts desire is, then the other is left with an uphill battle. The Word of God gets thrown out the window and no longer applies in the mind of the disobedient one. The carnal mind takes over and gives explanations as to why the words written do not mean what they say. It is nothing short of amazing to watch someone go from seeking to fulfill their biblically mandated role then one day decide they don't like something so now nothing applies. They simply start doing whatever they want.

Arrggh.

I had hope when I found God. My hope increased when I learned of Christ in truth. My hope died when I watched others turn the truth of God into a lie to worship and serve the creation rather than the creator. Come Lord Jesus.

I do thank God regularly for several of my friends and their families that do seek to live up to the biblical model and stay in their gender roles as presented within the scriptures. I thank him and then ask him to continue to do what he is already doing in them that is causing them to give such a good testimony unto a lost and dying world. Praise God!

[Fez]

As to marriage....

It is a three way covenant, not a two way contract. (Him, her, and God)

"A three strand cord is not easily broken".

And don't love your wife like you love Jesus (as I often hear people say). Rather love your wife like Jesus Loves you.

[Sevenseas]

Yeah someone said to me once...that it is a husband's 'duty' to love his wife. That just leaves me flat. So exciting. Bleck

[GoldenEagle]

Have you heard of the book "Love and Respect"?

I really like it. It talks about communication between husbands and wives. It also talks about men loving their wives not just respecting them. Then it goes into women respecting their husbands not simply loving them. Perhaps when I have more time I can post a better synopsis.

Meanwhile check this out.

http://loveandrespect.com/about-us/

[BFP]

Well I have always been a stay at home mom, and have had to defend that stance so many times...people say things like:

"oh you are just lucky your husband makes enough money to support you staying at home" Hahaha! Sure...that's why I drove $200 cars all my life until the last few years, and wore sally ann clothing and hand me downs...go to the hairdressers twice a year, and have learned to fix anything that breaks myself because we can't afford to hire someone...

The women who were saying that to me had manicure appointments twice a month, hairdressers every three weeks...brand new cars and brand name clothing...all stuff I couldn't really care less about, and they were miserable!

Or "You must have so much time on your hands" hahaha...actually when you have more time on your hands you seem to be more busy. People expect you to volunteer for everything...and until recently I couldn't say no. And when YOU are there for your family full time they take advantage as well.

There are so many funny things people say, they just don't understand.

I did work for three years...and found out quickly that my family liked it much better when I was at home making sure thier needs were taken care of. And if I had a rough day at work and came home talking about my job they looked at me like I was an alien, because I was supposed to be there to listen to THIER day...not be upset about mine. LOL!

Do I feel like a door mat? At times, yes...most of the time, no. My job is to take care of my families needs, and I enjoy it very much. I take pride in my home...my cooking skills, my crafting and sewing skills...and what I like most is that everything I do in a day is for someone else, so I never get selfish that way...well sometimes...

And I have a man who is good and faithful and loving to me, and children who love and respect me....and a God who fills me with joy, keeps me committed, and fills my heart with love. What more could a woman ask for?

[nebula]

I just want to discuss the roles of men and women in the bible and in marriages and as parents. I am very disappointed with how far astray these roles have ventured in society. If you are a woman who takes pride in your family first and foremost instead of pursuing a career or getting your me time in then you are a 'doormat'. You must be deppressed. You must be weak minded. You give women a bad name. If you are a man who desires a woman to take care of family and home, and want to be the provider/head of house, you're a sexist pig. You must be controlling. You must be abusive. You give men a bad name. I find a great deal of joy in trying to live up to my biblical role, and I find that is has a beautiful symmetry with my husband as himself in his role. I just wanted to share because I know there are others who find satisfaction in being a biblical complement to your spouse and fulfilling the biblical role to your children and don't feel oppressed or criminalized.

So what is the Biblical role of men and women?

I think the whole women "empowerment" movement is one of the biggest deceptions going. It's one thing for a woman to have equal opportunity who wants to work or who has to work. But this whole expectation to work is for the birds!

Children are being raised by babysitters, daycare providers, teachers, peers, and TV more than their parents. And then people wonder why society is messed up!

Women are dying younger - most likely due to having to deal with job pressures all their lives, just like men.

No, women should have the right and the freedom to be stay-at-home moms.

[1peterlight]

Well I have always been a stay at home mom, and have had to defend that stance so many times...people say things like:

"oh you are just lucky your husband makes enough money to support you staying at home" Hahaha! Sure...that's why I drove $200 cars all my life until the last few years, and wore sally ann clothing and hand me downs...go to the hairdressers twice a year, and have learned to fix anything that breaks myself because we can't afford to hire someone...

The women who were saying that to me had manicure appointments twice a month, hairdressers every three weeks...brand new cars and brand name clothing...all stuff I couldn't really care less about, and they were miserable!

Or "You must have so much time on your hands" hahaha...actually when you have more time on your hands you seem to be more busy. People expect you to volunteer for everything...and until recently I couldn't say no. And when YOU are there for your family full time they take advantage as well.

There are so many funny things people say, they just don't understand.

I did work for three years...and found out quickly that my family liked it much better when I was at home making sure thier needs were taken care of. And if I had a rough day at work and came home talking about my job they looked at me like I was an alien, because I was supposed to be there to listen to THIER day...not be upset about mine. LOL!

Do I feel like a door mat? At times, yes...most of the time, no. My job is to take care of my families needs, and I enjoy it very much. I take pride in my home...my cooking skills, my crafting and sewing skills...and what I like most is that everything I do in a day is for someone else, so I never get selfish that way...well sometimes...

And I have a man who is good and faithful and loving to me, and children who love and respect me....and a God who fills me with joy, keeps me committed, and fills my heart with love. What more could a woman ask for?

Amen! I could not have said it any better. I worked before and at one time even had this notion that I was not going to be 'stuck at home' if I wanted to work when I had kids(notice the I's??) and still sometimes cannot believe just how much more fulfilled I feel taking care of my family's needs. I work harder now than I ever did at a physical out of home job. I love the one about how much time I have on my hands lol. You really hit the nail on the head, it's a wonderful blessed thing. Praise God. And it is the same in my home, I am very frugal, and when we can splurge I have little desire to do so, I so appreciate that my husband goes to work everyday to earn that money to provide for us and I wouldn't be some pampered housewife out spending all his money, even if I could.

Unfortunately there are not a lot of others out there who share the ideals of scripture of what a man or woman's role is to be.

Due to the fact that we live in a world dominated by sin, we have to settle for that which falls short of the mark. Instead of being able to live out our roles perfectly, we have to seek to be righteous in an unrighteous world. Ideally each gender would be able to simply live inside of their God assigned roles but when a partner chooses to chuck their role and do what their hearts desire is, then the other is left with an uphill battle. The Word of God gets thrown out the window and no longer applies in the mind of the disobedient one. The carnal mind takes over and gives explanations as to why the words written do not mean what they say. It is nothing short of amazing to watch someone go from seeking to fulfill their biblically mandated role then one day decide they don't like something so now nothing applies. They simply start doing whatever they want.

Yes it is tragically unfortunate. And what's more is that so few know what it says in the bible about a man and wife. To many it is a submit and obey caveman brand of thinking(for women and men). The bible outlines a beautiful give and take relationship with God at the head, and yet you are right the bible itself can become a wedge, when one is trying to live by it and the other is not ready. I too have seen this. I often wonder when disagreeing about something and wanting to bring up scripture what the best way to do so is, because there will be times when the other is not willing to receive it, if it contradicts them and if brought up in haste or anger. I am curious about this, how couples discuss scripture when in disagreement. Your post sounded personal, I am sorry.

I think the whole women "empowerment" movement is one of the biggest deceptions going. It's one thing for a woman to have equal opportunity who wants to work or who has to work. But this whole expectation to work is for the birds!

Children are being raised by babysitters, daycare providers, teachers, peers, and TV more than their parents. And then people wonder why society is messed up!

Women are dying younger - most likely due to having to deal with job pressures all their lives, just like men.

No, women should have the right and the freedom to be stay-at-home moms.

I agree absolutely. I read that the feminist movement was funded by big money men, who wanted to get women working to tax more income, and to break apart the family so that the govt became the family. I dont know if it really played out that way. I can find very little spare a few websites about it to verify it, but it sure makes a load of sense to me. What do we have now? Single moms working their butts off, many of which rely on the govt to get by. Single dads who cant afford to pay child support, who must rely on the govt as well. If it's just a conspiracy theory, they sure nailed where it's at today. What's worse is when the children of this generation and the next come of age. I pray I raise my children right. I also pray they will find someone to stick by them, it seems like it is already like finding a needle in a haystack.

Have you heard of the book "Love and Respect"?

I really like it. It talks about communication between husbands and wives. It also talks about men loving their wives not just respecting them. Then it goes into women respecting their husbands not simply loving them. Perhaps when I have more time I can post a better synopsis.

Meanwhile check this out.

http://loveandrespect.com/about-us/

I will look into thank you.

^{Ephesians 5:25} Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her ²⁶ to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, ²⁷ and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. ²⁸ In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. ²⁹ After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— ³⁰ for we are members of his body. ³¹ “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”³² This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. ³³ However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

It was pointed out in a sermon I watched, to notice that the husband is to love the wife but the wife is to respect the husband. Not that the husband doesn't need love, or the wife respect, but each of these traits is specifically vital to the sex it's directed at. Men need to be respected, if they feel they are respected by their wives then they soar, but they're not really lovey dovey, needing to hear I love you, and have love affirmed to them. Women on the other hand, need to hear and feel this regularly. This is true in my life. Often a verse that gets overlooked or looked at negatively.

[1peterlight]

Have you heard of the book "Love and Respect"?

I really like it. It talks about communication between husbands and wives. It also talks about men loving their wives not just respecting them. Then it goes into women respecting their husbands not simply loving them. Perhaps when I have more time I can post a better synopsis.

Meanwhile check this out.

http://loveandrespect.com/about-us/

Well I read it only to realize you already said what I was trying to say. So many problems in relationships today and I wonder how many could be fixed with that little equation, that little nugget of wisdom, if taken to heart for what it says...