I don't seem to fit in with the Body

[pg4Him]

I've been a believer for about 15 years now. During that time, I've always tried hard to be involved in a church family. In the first few years, it seemed easy, but within the past decade it has been very difficult, getting harder all the time. We moved to our current city three years ago, and in that time we seriously have not been able to find a church we like. People are very nice and the sermons/worship are okay, but none of them seem to have any "oomph."

 

But really, the churches themselves are not what disturbs me. I've noticed a change among Christians in general. The ones I see in daily life, on facebook, at work, in my family... it seems they've all gone downhill. They never discuss the Bible unless it's to call someone a hypocrite. They seem more concerned about being popular and being liked by sinners, and they're scared to death of being seen as judgmental. Many of them are just shallow and vapid. They post photos of themselves drinking shots at a club in skimpy outfits - stuff that's so tacky even my nonbelieving friends have more class than that.

 

I watch people flounder in sinful lifestyles, going further into drug abuse, losing their marriages and their children, and no one steps in. If you say anything, you have 'Christians' coming out of woodwork to parrot some blather about thou shalt not judge. They're not around when you need help or advice, but they're johnny-on-the-spot when they see a chance to jump on you. I just don't get it.

 

It struck me tonight when I was chatting with a close friend who doesn't believe. I realized I would rather talk to him than most of the believers I know, and that really hurt me. I realized he had more class and self-control than some of my believer friends. And I realized I couldn't trust many of my believing friends to help me witness to him because I would be embarrassed to admit I know them.

 

I feel alone. I feel like I'm being bullied by the very people I should count on. Is there something wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? 

 

 

[missmuffet]

I've been a believer for about 15 years now. During that time, I've always tried hard to be involved in a church family. In the first few years, it seemed easy, but within the past decade it has been very difficult, getting harder all the time. We moved to our current city three years ago, and in that time we seriously have not been able to find a church we like. People are very nice and the sermons/worship are okay, but none of them seem to have any "oomph."

 

But really, the churches themselves are not what disturbs me. I've noticed a change among Christians in general. The ones I see in daily life, on facebook, at work, in my family... it seems they've all gone downhill. They never discuss the Bible unless it's to call someone a hypocrite. They seem more concerned about being popular and being liked by sinners, and they're scared to death of being seen as judgmental. Many of them are just shallow and vapid. They post photos of themselves drinking shots at a club in skimpy outfits - stuff that's so tacky even my nonbelieving friends have more class than that.

 

I watch people flounder in sinful lifestyles, going further into drug abuse, losing their marriages and their children, and no one steps in. If you say anything, you have 'Christians' coming out of woodwork to parrot some blather about thou shalt not judge. They're not around when you need help or advice, but they're johnny-on-the-spot when they see a chance to jump on you. I just don't get it.

 

It struck me tonight when I was chatting with a close friend who doesn't believe. I realized I would rather talk to him than most of the believers I know, and that really hurt me. I realized he had more class and self-control than some of my believer friends. And I realized I couldn't trust many of my believing friends to help me witness to him because I would be embarrassed to admit I know them.

 

I feel alone. I feel like I'm being bullied by the very people I should count on. Is there something wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? 

I totally know where you are coming from.Churches do not seem to be what they used to be.Once you leave one that you really like it is hard to find another like that because they are far and few between..... 

[other one]

a good start would be to print out that post and give it to your pastor in a one on one private place and ask him for some insight on how to deal with it.

 

you might try a Nazarene church.  while i don't agree with everything the church teaches it's the closest I've found, and I'd be shocked if you find these kinds of problems there.

[ayin jade]

Messianic congregations are good too. I love the one I go to. 

[pg4Him]

Thanks for the replies. It bothers me to look for churches outside of my normal denomination, but at this point I don't have much to lose. We were invited by friends to attend Catholic mass with them last Christmas and I enjoyed it. I don't think I would become Catholic but I felt a lot of sincerity from them and did feel like I was in God's presence during the program. I don't rely on church for my Scripture study, but I do miss the feeling of corporate worship. 

[OneLight]

I don't think there is anything wrong with you. I would say that you are doing things right. Remember, Jesus had only a hand full of believers that truly followed Him, and He is God.

[Guest]

I feel alone. I feel like I'm being bullied by the very people I should count on. Is there something wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? 

 

 

Your LORD

 

The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Psalms 23:1-3

 

Your Hope

 

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:5-6

 

Your Rock

 

My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.

He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved.

In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God. Psalms 62:5-7

 

~

 

Be Blessed Beloved Daughter Of The KING

 

The LORD bless thee, and keep thee:

The LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee:

The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace.

 

And they shall put my name upon the children of Israel; and I will bless them. Numbers 6:24-27

 

Love, Your Brother Joe

[Ih8s8n]

I've been a believer for about 15 years now. During that time, I've always tried hard to be involved in a church family. In the first few years, it seemed easy, but within the past decade it has been very difficult, getting harder all the time. We moved to our current city three years ago, and in that time we seriously have not been able to find a church we like. People are very nice and the sermons/worship are okay, but none of them seem to have any "oomph."

 

But really, the churches themselves are not what disturbs me. I've noticed a change among Christians in general. The ones I see in daily life, on facebook, at work, in my family... it seems they've all gone downhill. They never discuss the Bible unless it's to call someone a hypocrite. They seem more concerned about being popular and being liked by sinners, and they're scared to death of being seen as judgmental. Many of them are just shallow and vapid. They post photos of themselves drinking shots at a club in skimpy outfits - stuff that's so tacky even my nonbelieving friends have more class than that.

 

I watch people flounder in sinful lifestyles, going further into drug abuse, losing their marriages and their children, and no one steps in. If you say anything, you have 'Christians' coming out of woodwork to parrot some blather about thou shalt not judge. They're not around when you need help or advice, but they're johnny-on-the-spot when they see a chance to jump on you. I just don't get it.

 

It struck me tonight when I was chatting with a close friend who doesn't believe. I realized I would rather talk to him than most of the believers I know, and that really hurt me. I realized he had more class and self-control than some of my believer friends. And I realized I couldn't trust many of my believing friends to help me witness to him because I would be embarrassed to admit I know them.

 

I feel alone. I feel like I'm being bullied by the very people I should count on. Is there something wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? 

Change your opening sentence to read "I've been a believer for about 25 years now" and leave everything else that you said intact and you've basically described my life.  If there's something wrong with you, then I caught it about 10 years before you did.

[Guest]

Thanks for the replies. It bothers me to look for churches outside of my normal denomination, but at this point I don't have much to lose. We were invited by friends to attend Catholic mass with them last Christmas and I enjoyed it. I don't think I would become Catholic but I felt a lot of sincerity from them and did feel like I was in God's presence during the program. I don't rely on church for my Scripture study, but I do miss the feeling of corporate worship. 

 

Just wanted to address the bolded statement in addition to the great advice others have posted.

 

Denominations don't mean a whole lot these days. You are not alone in feeling that so many churches have gone down hill, either. I noticed that when I came back to the US from Europe in the mid-80's. Things haven't improved much over the years either. Not all churches are like that, and I would suggest asking the Lord to show you where He wants you -- no matter the denomination. It took me just over a year and a half to find the church I go to now and I was about ready to give up in disgust when I found it. It's a small church in a small denomination -- but they still preach the Bible as the Word of God.

[pg4Him]

Yeah it seems like a lot of the denominational churches these carries carry the label but not the doctrine. It's weird.