Divorce is not of God; God hates putting away.

[hmbld]

3 hours ago, algots said:

WOW. People will do what they want to do and they will justify it by claiming God gave them a peace about it.

God doesn't want us to be unhappy. As if our happiness is the most important thing to God.

Forget about God's Holiness. Forget about His righteousness. Forget about our integrity. Forget about us honoring our Word to each other and our promises to Him. God will willfully and willingly throw all those away if we're not happy. It's no wonder we're so messed up.

I promise to love, honor, and cherish you as long as we both shall love.

This is the problem when a marriage, a household, or a family has two heads.

 

 

I am curious as to how you view Jeremiah 3, as posted above.  God gave her a certificate of divorce, yet desired Israel to return to Him.  It is showing His will and Israel's will are not the same, and if one of the parties is not willing, then how can there be a marriage?  Now, back to your address to Bopeep, sometimes we can be talking to the person who did not look for a way out of marriage, but instead was the victim of their spouse, in such a case, we should be careful as it may have been out of their control and God does indeed give us peace.  

[hmbld]

4 minutes ago, algots said:

Every man's way is right in their own eyes.

God doesn't set a blanket rule, but it's ok if I violate it. God is not arbitrary.

I had a friend who wanted out of her marriage. Her husband partied, drank, and hung out with the boys. This he had done since before they married, but she married him anyway. She attempted to pull the mental abuse card. I didn't argue with her the merits of it being hard. I simply told her that mental abuse, or any abuse, wasn't grounds for divorce in Scripture.

And it isn't. Separation is permissible for these violations, but divorce isn't. Once you're married, only infidelity, or the unbelieving spouse leaving are Biblical grounds. So, the entire focus is reconciliation. Doing what is needed to to rejoin the union on the part of the believer.

And Jeremiah 3 has nothing to do with God's plan for marriage between a man and a woman since the beginning of mankind.

I am having difficulty in telling if and when you are being sarcastic.  As sarcasm is basically a lie, I generally try to take people at what their words actually say.  I've been one who easily missed sarcasm, so if I'm wrong here I apologize.  I agree, it does seem many seek a divorce for no other grounds then "I deserve to be happy" syndrome.  But, we must be careful in judging.  The partner of "I deserve to be happy" may not be abusive, or unfaithful, and gets judged for being divorced of no fault of their own, they are a victim.  

As for your last sentence, here is from Gill's exposition of the entire bible:

 

 with what were commonly said among men, or in the law, and as the sense of that; that if a man divorced his wife upon any occasion, 

and she go from him; departs from his house, and is separated from bed and board with him: 

and become another man's, be married to another, as she might according to the law: 

shall he return unto her again? take her to be his wife again; her latter husband not liking her, or being dead? no, he will not; he might not according to the law in Deuteronomy 24:4and if there was no law respecting this, it can hardly be thought that he would, it being so contrary to nature, and to the order of civil society: 

shall not that land be greatly polluted? either Judea, or any other, where such usages should obtain; for this, according to the law, was causing the land to sin, filling it with it, and making it liable to punishment for it; this being an abomination before the Lord. The Septuagint, Vulgate Latin, and Arabic versions, render it, "shall not that woman be defiled?" she is so by the latter husband; and that is a reason why she is not to be received by the former again, Deuteronomy 24:4, 

but thou hast played the harlot with many lovers; or served many idols; the number of their gods having been according to the number of their cities, Jeremiah 2:28, 

yet return again to me, saith the Lord; by repentance, and doing their first works, worshipping and serving him as formerly; so the Targum, 

"return now from this time to my worship, saith the Lord.'' 

The Vulgate Latin version adds, "and I will receive thee"; this is an instance of great grace in the Lord, and which is not to be found among men.

 

 

It reads very much to me as God views this very much in marriage terms, in which God seeks reconciliation, such as you stated, but even then it is with conditions on the party that was unfaithful, as the scripture William provided above shows.  Again, I agree a marriage is a covenant, not meant to be broken, yet Israel broke that covenant, and was unfaithful, would anyone propose to blame God?  Just as in when a marriage ends in divorce, be careful not to blame the party who was wronged.  Being walked out on by your spouse is not, quote "People will do what they want to do and they will justify it by claiming God gave them a peace about it."  Then there is also the abusive marriages, physical, emotional, psychological, abuse, where if the abused is reading posts like yours, they already believe divorce is so wrong they must endure it.  God does hate divorce, yet I don't think God is indifferent to being abused.  Is there grace?  Does God give peace?  I wonder if while we are so busy bringing up God's righteousness we forget God brings peace to those who reconcile themselves to Him.  

[RustyAngeL]

On 3/15/2016 at 11:33 AM, Thallasa said:

Well ,when I think of how women were treated by 'christian society ' until recently ,and how many of them put up with  the most horrendous abuse ,then it is for the men who totally ran society, to examine their conscience to see if they were part of the hypocritical values which allowed women to be raped and blamed . Even children . Yes I think there are too many men who call themselves christian who do not like women to this day ,  but they wil find Jesus is not like them at all .

If it had not been so , there would be less divorce .  I know America is different from Europe in that divorce came sooner .

There are millions of untold stories of cruelty ,even murder . Yes, in France alone every day there is a woman killed by her husband or partner , but it is kept under wraps ,or was until recently . 

I have a friend who married two abusive men. The first she divorced, the second died.  She put up with the beatings, verbul abuse from him for 32 years.  He died.  Then she married the one she is married to now.  He doesn't hit her but is very controlling and tries to run every aspect of her life.  I guess she thinks any man that doesn't hit her is a good man.  So many times she has said she's sorry she married this man then says,  "well he pays the bills and does things around the house."  That makes me glad I didn't take up the two offers I got after Steve passed away.  Both are good men but both had a lot of baggage.  The house can get very quiet at times but I guess if there is another Mr. Right God will let me know, but with these two it just didn't seem as if it was supposed to be.

Women have to think before they make this leap and so do men.  Marriage is not to be taken lightly.  It is very serious business. 

[gdemoss]

On 3/12/2016 at 5:05 PM, opportunitykenny said:

Genesis 2:24 

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Matthew 19:6  

Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

Matthew 19:2

And great multitudes followed him; and he healed them there.  

19:3 

The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?  

19:4 

And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,  

19:5 

And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?  

19:6 

Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.  

19:7 

They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away?

19:8 

He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 

19:9 

And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.  

19:10 

His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.

19:11 

But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given.

Malachi 2:14 

Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.

 2:15 

And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.  

2:16 

For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.

Questions:

Despite the fact that divorce is not of God, Though God hates putting away, why is it that some christians still want to put away or divorce their wives or husbands? Even in the case of seperation because of looming dangers to lives, does that give permission to remarry?

The 3 basic commandments of scripture are:

Love God with all your heart, mind, soul and body.

Love your neighbor as yourself.

Love each other as Christ has loved us.

I don't wish to become a teacher of the law but rather a mediator whose hope is to reconcile sinful people unto God.  My job is to show them Christ.  Gods job is to judge them and take vengeance on all who trample him underfoot, therefore I shall only love them and teach them to love each other who have fallen short the glory of God in the institution of marriage and leave the law to the Pharisees who sit in Moses seat.

[RustyAngeL]

On 4/3/2016 at 5:51 AM, algots said:

WOW. People will do what they want to do and they will justify it by claiming God gave them a peace about it.

God doesn't want us to be unhappy. As if our happiness is the most important thing to God.

Forget about God's Holiness. Forget about His righteousness. Forget about our integrity. Forget about us honoring our Word to each other and our promises to Him. God will willfully and willingly throw all those away if we're not happy. It's no wonder we're so messed up.

I promise to love, honor, and cherish you as long as we both shall love.

This is the problem when a marriage, a household, or a family has two heads.

 

 

It seems like a lot of people go into marriage today with the the thought in the back of their mind "if it doesn't work out we can always get divorced.  In our home divorce was not an option.  Steve had been through a divorce and it as I said was not an option. I fully agreed. That is the way it should be started.

[kwikphilly]

Blessings,,,,

Quote

WOW. People will do what they want to do and they will justify it by claiming God gave them a peace about it.

This comment just blew me away,especially in response to Bopeep speaking of abusive marriage,,,,,,,it is not even a matter of being "happy" but in many cases it is a matter of life & death. I guess unless you've had your nose & ribs broken and wondered if you would live to see the next day you would have no idea what it is to run to the Safety of Gods Loving Arms & walk away from the situation(marriage)hand in hand with the Prince of Peace............

 Getting re-married to my present wonderful,God Loving husband was a bit if a dilemma for me,,,,,,,,,,my husband says the very moment that man struck me that marriage was over in Gods Eyes ,I don't know how it all works but I certainly had Peace & Blessed Assurance to leave,,,,,,, and then,funnily enough,I did not have to get a divorce(though I filed),,,,,,he died      

[missmuffet]

On 4/6/2016 at 7:41 PM, RustyAngeL said:

I have a friend who married two abusive men. The first she divorced, the second died.  She put up with the beatings, verbul abuse from him for 32 years.  He died.  Then she married the one she is married to now.  He doesn't hit her but is very controlling and tries to run every aspect of her life.  I guess she thinks any man that doesn't hit her is a good man.  So many times she has said she's sorry she married this man then says,  "well he pays the bills and does things around the house."  That makes me glad I didn't take up the two offers I got after Steve passed away.  Both are good men but both had a lot of baggage.  The house can get very quiet at times but I guess if there is another Mr. Right God will let me know, but with these two it just didn't seem as if it was supposed to be.

Women have to think before they make this leap and so do men.  Marriage is not to be taken lightly.  It is very serious business. 

There are some women who seek out these kind of men. And these kind of men know who to choose for their next victim. There is a lot that goes into it as far as why women gravitate towards these kind of men. That women needs counseling.

[kwikphilly]

Blessings......

    What that woman needs is Jesus,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,there is a lot more to it for sure ,she also needs our prayers              

[missmuffet]

4 minutes ago, kwikphilly said:

Blessings......

    What that woman needs is Jesus,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,there is a lot more to it for sure ,she also needs our prayers              

Yes,she does. She will get some good guidance and direction when her life is in God's hands. But you know the saying.....You can lead a horse to water but......

[kwikphilly]

Yes,it applies to both men & women ,there are men who are abused also & it can be a matter of life & death

As far as your marriage & your wife? That would be between you & God.........................................