How should I respond to this request?

[appy]

Ever hear the saying? Two wrongs do not make a right?

The proverbial adage above means that, if someone has done something wrong to you and for that, you will get revenge by returning the favor in kind. Doing so, will not make the situation better, it will in fact make it worse. Tit-for-tat, will not improve the relationship between you and your dad but create more chaos in the relationship. Don't lower yourself to the other person's level by following a bad example!!

Take your dad to and from the hospital...why? Because being angry and bitter about your dad's previous actions will continue to eat away at you and rob you of any and all joy in your life. By not returning the favor, you will rise above the occasion. Do it first, because God tells us in His written word to do good to those who are spiteful to us.

And second, because it is the right thing to do. The next reason is because the joy from the revengeful act is very, very short-lived and vanishes very quickly. The joy and reward you will get from doing the right thing instead of getting even, will be with you for the rest of your life. Think you feel bad now? You will feel horrible if something goes wrong while your dad is trying to get himself home.  Take your dad to and from the hospital ok?

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[ladypeartree]

At the moment you have a roof over your head and more importantly over your sons head. If you keep being as bad as your father what happens if/when he kicks you out ? Yes it could happen and you and your child find yourselves living on the street . Until you are in a position to take care of yourself and your child you have to be the adult and " suck it up " like it or not . I am thankful that our heavenly Father has forgiven me for so many things and doesnt do a tit for tat punishment 

Praying for you to find compassion in your heart instead of anger 

[FrankIeCip]

Well you didn’t take him. So now what? Do you really feel better? We should love people even if they hate us. I’m not saying he hates you, you’re his daughter. It’s probably just tough love. Repay evil with kindness and honor your parents. I know it’s not easy but you would be pleasing God who matters the most. 
Praying for you all ??

Edited October 28, 2020 by FrankIeCip

[FrankIeCip]

Your second post confused me. If it’s not too late take him. He may learn from you. ??

[Ray12614]

8 hours ago, Figure of eighty said:

It doesn't matter what I do. Ive done alot for my dad and he's still a self xentered narcissist.

Thank God He does not treat His family like you treat your dad!  narcissist or not, Biblically, we should help our parents when able to do so. If you cannot honor your dad, then do it for your Heavenly Father. I suspect you may have bitterness against your dad, which you should deal with, or, it will eat you up.

so that is my advice based on what I have read.   Ray . .   

[Figure of eighty]

3 hours ago, ladypeartree said:

At the moment you have a roof over your head and more importantly over your sons head. If you keep being as bad as your father what happens if/when he kicks you out ? Yes it could happen and you and your child find yourselves living on the street . Until you are in a position to take care of yourself and your child you have to be the adult and " suck it up " like it or not . I am thankful that our heavenly Father has forgiven me for so many things and doesnt do a tit for tat punishment 

Praying for you to find compassion in your heart instead of anger 

He cant kick me out bc he pays no bills. This apartment is in my mothers name. Whenever she'd need help she'd come to me not him bc he wont do it. I say that to say my mom would have to be the one to kick me out not him.

I was genuinely going to take him until he said what he did abt my son.

.

Edited October 28, 2020 by Figure of eighty

[leah777]

2 minutes ago, Figure of eighty said:

He cant kick me out bc he pays no bills. This apartment is in my mothers name. Whenever she'd need help she'd come to me not him bc he wont do it. 

I was genuinely going to take him until he said what he did abt my son.

.

You and your father need some conflict resolution therapy. 

Maybe your father is angry because he can't work or pay bills and feel emasculated and frustrated and is in a lot of pain.

There is little compassion going on with both you and your father. 

You also need to grow up and not play tit for tat. 

What kind of back surgery is day surgery in the US? 

[BeauJangles]

Dear little Sister Figure-of-eighty,

You are probably one of our younger members I've gotten to know inasmuch it is possible to do online since you've joined Worthy's forum two years ago. We alike in a couple of things. I'm an old dude, but you and I are going through some tremendously difficult times right now. You in your youthful years and I in the twilight of mine. It seems we're both pretty familiar with one another as well. Anyway, there are a few here I look over with tremendous concern and compassion as kind of an uncle in the Lord if you will. 

I think it would be the best to keep your word in spite of your father's hateful attitude and the fact you're being financially taken for granted. You are living in with your family still. Having a baby at such an age put a lot of responsibilities you weren't ready for, but took the right path in not making bad choices concerning bringing life into this world. Raising a child in today's world isn't easy under the best of circumstances and without a positive father in the picture. There were and are some very difficult roads still ahead for you. 

Please don't go back on what is your promise to take your father to and from his surgery. You won't regret it even if he lacks true appreciation for doing this for him. Obviously there wasn't anyone else he can depend on or he wouldn't have asked you. Your folks know you are Christian and are saved, so keeping your word is an essential witness to them. If you go back on that now, it only gives both your parents ammo against the faith and could deter a future decision in life both of them desperately need. That is Jesus Christ and His salvation. 

Do this for the Lord, not for your dad. 

Love in Christ, 

Beau

[BeauJangles]

2 hours ago, leah777 said:

What kind of back surgery is day surgery in the US? 

This is commonly referred to as, "in-and-out surgery" due to the fact there are no real needs for a hospital stay if it's not really necessary. If post operative care is available in the home with needed support, an overnight stay can avert insurmountable insurance costs. Since we have no socialized medicine in the United States, some rooms can run into many thousands of dollars a day. Going home to recover is a good option to keep the cost down for the surgical procedure. 

P.S. (added) The new laser procedure for spinal surgery can be done without the traditional scalpel method, which is minutely invasive. If successful, this means a tiny area is used for the incision and in many instances does not even require stitches. Good results mean you can return home the same day. 

Edited October 28, 2020 by BeauJangles

[leah777]

5 hours ago, Figure of eighty said:

He cant kick me out bc he pays no bills. This apartment is in my mothers name. Whenever she'd need help she'd come to me not him bc he wont do it. I say that to say my mom would have to be the one to kick me out not him.

I was genuinely going to take him until he said what he did abt my son.

.

I give you advice, good advice and counsel, and you give me 'oy vey' You need to start listening to people on here who say things you dont like. Our job, as fellow Christians, is not to say everything is OK if it is not. You ask for wisdom and advice, then are rude to those who post.

Please, take a step back and do some practical and scriptural thinking about your situation.