Taking my mental health into my hands

[Figure of eighty]

Hello. So I'm back again and I want to thank you guys for keeping me in your prayers about my previous situation. 

Now I feel I have another thing to deal with now. I've been struggling with my mental health. Some days are okay and others like today have me really on edge. Sometimes I feel it's a bit normal as I'm a single mom of 2 toddlers and I'm going through a break up with my BD but it's really triggering deep insecurities. 

I'm doing therapy but it's once a week and I feel perhaps I need medication bc I feel very alone with my kids and them being needy and demanding...then dealing with the break up and all of these dark and heavy thoughts.  

It feels overwhelming. I wish I could force myself to be normal but I can't. 

I know God wants us to include him in everything so how do I do that while I treat myself as well? 

Also how do I get over the fear of meds? I'm afraid I won't be myself or ill gain alot of weight.. 

[AnOrangeCat]

1 hour ago, Figure of eighty said:

Also how do I get over the fear of meds? I'm afraid I won't be myself or ill gain alot of weight.. 

I'm not a big fan of psych meds myself so maybe I should just stop typing. They are, imo, an imperfect science that's been pushed our way because there's so much money involved so your worries aren't without some justification. But with that out of the way there's maybe a few things to help.

One, have a close friend, preferably someone offline, who can keep an eye out for any red flags on behavioral changes.

Two, regarding the weight gain, not all people get hit with all the potential side effects. But if you do get that particular side effect you've got to ask yourself what you're going to prioritize.

Three, if you do get in psych meds keep in mind that withdrawal from them can sometimes be very harsh depending on your personal chemistry and specific meds. Make sure you've got a good personal safety net to fall back on.

[FJK]

If you have an actual physical disorder (i.e. organic brain syndrome or brain injury), medications are valid and likely necesssary.

If you don't you need to know what you are calling mental mental illness and how you have acquired it if you want to actually overcome it, simply learning to act mentally healthy does not change who you are at the core of your personality, it just helps you to get by in the world in a more effective manner.

In the end, everything comes down to your decision, deciding for yourself which of the choices available to you to take, since you are the one that lives with the consequences of it. 

Praying for wisdom in your decision should be given the highest priority, ask for God's solution and you will receive it, but you are the one that has to seek it out and put it to use, no one else can do it for you.

[R. Hartono]

Everybody has some uneasy situation, Jesus did not promise us Rose garden, just hang on and keep praying faithfully. 

[Marathoner]

8 hours ago, Figure of eighty said:

Hello. So I'm back again and I want to thank you guys for keeping me in your prayers about my previous situation. 

Now I feel I have another thing to deal with now. I've been struggling with my mental health. Some days are okay and others like today have me really on edge. Sometimes I feel it's a bit normal as I'm a single mom of 2 toddlers and I'm going through a break up with my BD but it's really triggering deep insecurities. 

I'm doing therapy but it's once a week and I feel perhaps I need medication bc I feel very alone with my kids and them being needy and demanding...then dealing with the break up and all of these dark and heavy thoughts.  

It feels overwhelming. I wish I could force myself to be normal but I can't. 

I know God wants us to include him in everything so how do I do that while I treat myself as well? 

Also how do I get over the fear of meds? I'm afraid I won't be myself or ill gain alot of weight.. 

I'm not aware of your psychiatric troubles so I cannot comment on that, my friend. Generally speaking, if you suffer from Bipolar Disorder (either type)... Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder... Borderline Personality Disorder... or something similar to these, then medication may indeed be helpful for you. As for weight gain, bear in mind that medications themselves don't cause you to gain weight; some stimulate the appetite, and so eating more food than normal is the cause behind weight gain. 

You don't have to force yourself to be anyone other than who you are, @Figure of eighty. I understand this runs afoul of what some preach and teach but we suffer from affliction on this earth, and it pleases the Lord that we do. I've lived with major depressive disorder for most of my life --- it began when I was 11 years old --- and I'm the odd one out in my family of flesh and blood. I have three siblings, and all three suffer from Bipolar Disorder (type 2). Medication helps them, but it never worked for me. Major depression, much like other mood disorders, varies in severity and expression. Medication had no effect upon me whatsoever. 

My eleventh birthday is the benchmark, for that's when adolescence started. I attempted suicide that year and continued attempting suicide throughout my teens (many failed attempts). I was amazed at what happened when I enlisted in the U.S. Army: I found something to pour myself into that had nothing to do with me. I focused upon my duty as a soldier and while I was in, I never suffered from those suicidal impulses that plagued my youth. The military was a blessed relief in many ways. I escaped the grasp of my parents and for a while, I escaped the most severe aspect of major depressive disorder. 

After I was honorably discharged, those suicidal ideations returned with a vengeance. Ah, but then the Lord called to me, and He gave me something to pour myself into that had nothing to do with me. I continued to suffer and He promised that one day, He would deliver me from the power of major depressive disorder...

Which He did, only it was over twenty years later. I almost died from a rare genetic illness, Figure of eighty. I sustained brain damage during that ordeal and when the Lord healed me, returning me to health, He also rejuvenated those areas of the brain that were infected. That's when it happened, and that's when the Lord delivered me from those suicidal ideations/impulses. They were gone and never returned. 

Remnants of depression remain, and so the Spirit teaches me how to place one foot in front of the other every day. If I forget, the Lord reminds me; and I do indeed forget at times. He is faithful to remind me that I am no longer under the power of major depressive disorder. At no time has the Lord called upon me to be anyone other than who I am... not now, and not in the past. What does He say? I created you; why are you ashamed? We are His overcomers, my friend. 

There's no shame in medical treatment. If that's what you need, then lean into it with no misgivings. 

[Anne2]

1 hour ago, Marathoner said:

I'm not aware of your psychiatric troubles so I cannot comment on that, my friend. Generally speaking, if you suffer from Bipolar Disorder (either type)... Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder... Borderline Personality Disorder... or something similar to these, then medication may indeed be helpful for you. As for weight gain, bear in mind that medications themselves don't cause you to gain weight; some stimulate the appetite, and so eating more food than normal is the cause behind weight gain. 

You don't have to force yourself to be anyone other than who you are, @Figure of eighty. I understand this runs afoul of what some preach and teach but we suffer from affliction on this earth, and it pleases the Lord that we do. I've lived with major depressive disorder for most of my life --- it began when I was 11 years old --- and I'm the odd one out in my family of flesh and blood. I have three siblings, and all three suffer from Bipolar Disorder (type 2). Medication helps them, but it never worked for me. Major depression, much like other mood disorders, varies in severity and expression. Medication had no effect upon me whatsoever. 

My eleventh birthday is the benchmark, for that's when adolescence started. I attempted suicide that year and continued attempting suicide throughout my teens (many failed attempts). I was amazed at what happened when I enlisted in the U.S. Army: I found something to pour myself into that had nothing to do with me. I focused upon my duty as a soldier and while I was in, I never suffered from those suicidal impulses that plagued my youth. The military was a blessed relief in many ways. I escaped the grasp of my parents and for a while, I escaped the most severe aspect of major depressive disorder. 

After I was honorably discharged, those suicidal ideations returned with a vengeance. Ah, but then the Lord called to me, and He gave me something to pour myself into that had nothing to do with me. I continued to suffer and He promised that one day, He would deliver me from the power of major depressive disorder...

Which He did, only it was over twenty years later. I almost died from a rare genetic illness, Figure of eighty. I sustained brain damage during that ordeal and when the Lord healed me, returning me to health, He also rejuvenated those areas of the brain that were infected. That's when it happened, and that's when the Lord delivered me from those suicidal ideations/impulses. They were gone and never returned. 

Remnants of depression remain, and so the Spirit teaches me how to place one foot in front of the other every day. If I forget, the Lord reminds me; and I do indeed forget at times. He is faithful to remind me that I am no longer under the power of major depressive disorder. At no time has the Lord called upon me to be anyone other than who I am... not now, and not in the past. What does He say? I created you; why are you ashamed? We are His overcomers, my friend. 

There's no shame in medical treatment. If that's what you need, then lean into it with no misgivings. 

I also have had issues years ago. I was pregnant so I could not use antidepressants for a couple of months.Lots of stress at that time. there is nothing wrong with meds if you need them. I have not needed any for many years, but they certainly did help.

[com7fy8]

10 hours ago, Figure of eighty said:

 

I know God wants us to include him in everything so how do I do that while I treat myself as well? 

 

What do we mean by a "BD"? 

About how God wants to take care of you > He can guide you about what He desires you to do. Trust Him to guide you, including making you able to hear Him and able to sense and submit to how He takes you along.

And He is able to reach where physical drugs can not reach. And His peace in our minds is almighty so no nasty emotions and reacting can drive away His peace.

[Anne2]

10 hours ago, Figure of eighty said:

Hello. So I'm back again and I want to thank you guys for keeping me in your prayers about my previous situation. 

Now I feel I have another thing to deal with now. I've been struggling with my mental health. Some days are okay and others like today have me really on edge. Sometimes I feel it's a bit normal as I'm a single mom of 2 toddlers and I'm going through a break up with my BD but it's really triggering deep insecurities. 

I'm doing therapy but it's once a week and I feel perhaps I need medication bc I feel very alone with my kids and them being needy and demanding...then dealing with the break up and all of these dark and heavy thoughts.  

It feels overwhelming. I wish I could force myself to be normal but I can't. 

I know God wants us to include him in everything so how do I do that while I treat myself as well? 

Also how do I get over the fear of meds? I'm afraid I won't be myself or ill gain alot of weight.. 

Prayers for you. I hope you have some support from family or friends. Meds helped me when I had two small kids and a newborn baby. Lean on God, but sometimes God chooses for his own reasons to let meds help. God bless you. I know it can be so hard. 

[Figure of eighty]

On 4/12/2023 at 9:31 PM, Marathoner said:

I'm not aware of your psychiatric troubles so I cannot comment on that, my friend. Generally speaking, if you suffer from Bipolar Disorder (either type)... Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder... Borderline Personality Disorder... or something similar to these, then medication may indeed be helpful for you. As for weight gain, bear in mind that medications themselves don't cause you to gain weight; some stimulate the appetite, and so eating more food than normal is the cause behind weight gain. 

You don't have to force yourself to be anyone other than who you are, @Figure of eighty. I understand this runs afoul of what some preach and teach but we suffer from affliction on this earth, and it pleases the Lord that we do. I've lived with major depressive disorder for most of my life --- it began when I was 11 years old --- and I'm the odd one out in my family of flesh and blood. I have three siblings, and all three suffer from Bipolar Disorder (type 2). Medication helps them, but it never worked for me. Major depression, much like other mood disorders, varies in severity and expression. Medication had no effect upon me whatsoever. 

My eleventh birthday is the benchmark, for that's when adolescence started. I attempted suicide that year and continued attempting suicide throughout my teens (many failed attempts). I was amazed at what happened when I enlisted in the U.S. Army: I found something to pour myself into that had nothing to do with me. I focused upon my duty as a soldier and while I was in, I never suffered from those suicidal impulses that plagued my youth. The military was a blessed relief in many ways. I escaped the grasp of my parents and for a while, I escaped the most severe aspect of major depressive disorder. 

After I was honorably discharged, those suicidal ideations returned with a vengeance. Ah, but then the Lord called to me, and He gave me something to pour myself into that had nothing to do with me. I continued to suffer and He promised that one day, He would deliver me from the power of major depressive disorder...

Which He did, only it was over twenty years later. I almost died from a rare genetic illness, Figure of eighty. I sustained brain damage during that ordeal and when the Lord healed me, returning me to health, He also rejuvenated those areas of the brain that were infected. That's when it happened, and that's when the Lord delivered me from those suicidal ideations/impulses. They were gone and never returned. 

Remnants of depression remain, and so the Spirit teaches me how to place one foot in front of the other every day. If I forget, the Lord reminds me; and I do indeed forget at times. He is faithful to remind me that I am no longer under the power of major depressive disorder. At no time has the Lord called upon me to be anyone other than who I am... not now, and not in the past. What does He say? I created you; why are you ashamed? We are His overcomers, my friend. 

There's no shame in medical treatment. If that's what you need, then lean into it with no misgivings. 

Wow. You are amazing to get through all of that.

[ChristB4us]

On 4/12/2023 at 12:15 PM, Figure of eighty said:

Hello. So I'm back again and I want to thank you guys for keeping me in your prayers about my previous situation. 

Now I feel I have another thing to deal with now. I've been struggling with my mental health. Some days are okay and others like today have me really on edge. Sometimes I feel it's a bit normal as I'm a single mom of 2 toddlers and I'm going through a break up with my BD but it's really triggering deep insecurities. 

I'm doing therapy but it's once a week and I feel perhaps I need medication bc I feel very alone with my kids and them being needy and demanding...then dealing with the break up and all of these dark and heavy thoughts.  

It feels overwhelming. I wish I could force myself to be normal but I can't. 

I know God wants us to include him in everything so how do I do that while I treat myself as well? 

Also how do I get over the fear of meds? I'm afraid I won't be myself or ill gain alot of weight.. 

Normal is over rated.  What is normal anyway?  Life is not normal for any one.

Ask Jesus for help daily and then ask your kids for help and set boundaries for them along with personal chores.

Sometimes coffee and sugar may have an influence on adults just as they do on children.  If the children are rowdy, cut back on sugar and any caffeine they may get a hold of like Pepsi drinks or hot chocolate.  By not having them available around the house, less temptation for them to snack on junk food and for you also.  

Try different snacks like apples and other fruits and nuts, providing you or/& your kids are not allergic to them.  

Ask your doctor what exercise you can do per your health because exercise do help with depression.  It does for me.  I feel better after exercising.  It may be that all you would be allowed to do by your doctor is to go for a walk, but check with your doctor first.  If you cannot find the time because of your kids, then take your kids on a walk with you.

I read the Psalms before going to bed at night.  Jesus Christ gives me hope and encouragement and peace when reading what the Psalmist is going through and how the Lord helps him.  And if you like it in getting your sleep in, one can always start the day reading the Psalms again.   Maybe your kids would enjoy reading the Psalms with you also.

Drugs for depression comes with side effects that can cause thoughts of suicide.  If you are pressured to take that route, read the side effects first before getting it at the pharmacy and if you do not like what you see, know you have the right to say no to that drug.  

I have no confidence in that part of the medical field.  It seems to me that vain is the help of man like the Bible says.

But you can take everything to the Lord in prayer for He is in you and is with you always.

Philippians 4:6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. 7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. 9 Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.

Romans 8:31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? 32 He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?

Hebrews 4:12 For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 13 Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do. 14 Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our profession. 15 For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.