Parents so called rights

[yukon]

God put you in the family that you are in and trust that the parents He has chosen you to be with, will raise you according to His Will. Until you reach the age of 18yrs, your parents have control of your rights because God instilled that in them. So, you are following God if you obey and treat your parents with respect.

Honor thy mother and father is like obeying them, doing what that ask of you, not being hateful to them, etc...

God put you in this family for a purpose, you must trust God for He knows all of the answers, seek God in prayer, have prayer time with your mother and dad, and Honor God for the family that He has given you!!

Yukon

[GymRose]

I think through all generations Beth there has been a struggle between adults and children to a certain degree. I am almost 15 years older than you and as you know between Dan and I we have 4 boys altogether our eldest turns 12 this year. There is a vast difference between how Dan and I pushed boundries and how our eldest is pushing boundries. Your generations and our sons I would think is the first to say "who gives them the right?" We all said it growing up to a degree but never so strong as the up coming generations.

The sad fact is it is our governments who have aided in the generation under us ( your generation ) being so determined to push even harder by teaching in schools " they just gave birth to you, they have no right to train you".

Yes Beth you are solely Gods property but I'm sorry, God gave YOUR PARENTS charge over you and no you are not a dog but he told YOUR PARENTS to train you.

Tonight on A Current Affair was a story here in Australia where one girl at 15 was told she could get a payment from welfare, her mother contacted the welfare group and said if you give her that payment she will spend it on drugs. That girl is now living on the streets with her 14 year old boyfriend doing drugs, drinking and smoking. Her mum is desperate to get her home and no one in our buricratic system would listen to a mum who knew her daughter was heading the wrong way.

You tell me why parents have the right. Why as an adult does God have the right to disipline me when I'm headed the wrong way, I'm an adult I know what I need and when I need it I don't need Him to let me know what is what...................??????

But ya know he loves me and wants to protect me and teach me the right way. Why do parents have the right?

Here is another story from ACA I'll try to get the other one when they have it online it was only on TV tonight.

http://aca.ninemsn.com.au/stories/1663.asp

Beth even us older than you here who are parents know what it is like to have the feelings you have now but we've learned by becoming parents to understand. It's just your generation for the most part has assistance by real ungodly, self serving polititions and government policies to ignite those age old feelings of rebelion and wanting to grow into an even greater power struggle because no other generation has had the fuel of blame and labeling telling them parents have no right to do as God has instructed to do.

If you don't trust your parents then trust God and know your parents are your parents because HE, the God you trust ordained it.

[irishcowboy]

if a person is living in their parents house, they are ultimatly the responsibility of the parents.......

for instance,

if a child of a parent ( the child being even 35 years old ) working, has children of his own (or her own) so that even the grand children are in the same house, and for the most part supporting themselves, and the child does not have auto insurance, guess who is held responsible for the damage done if the child has an accident???? the child? his ( or her ) children? or the parents?...

THE PARENTS ....... by having the child living in their house they are providing some support, thus, by providing any support, then they are responsible for having insurance on the vehicle the child is driving....

well, what if the parents do not know the 35 year old child does not have insurance? guess what? NO EXCUSE!!!!

do parents have the right to know whether or not you have insurance? yes!

do parents have the right to know what you have stashed away in your room? YES!

the owner of the house is responsible for anything that may be found in the house,

yes, even on the computer that the child is using...... if there is illicit stuff on the computer, the parent is also responsible for it......

if there are drugs found in the house the owner/parent is the responsible party....

the parent also can get away with only providing a bed ( dont have to be nothing fancy either ) cloths ( even good condition thrift shop cloths, no designer ) and some meals, ( dont have to be something the child likes either, as long as they are good square meals )..... oh yea, and education which does not mean that they have to provide the transportation..... discipline, yep, you got it..... what the parent does not have to provide is TV, VCR,DVD, computers, radio, tapes, they do not have to allow friends to come over, they do not have to provide name brand cloths, or pizza, or cars, or even bikes or skate boards, they can forbid some one from entering a car with some one other then family members, they do not have to provide shopping trips to the local mall, or even allow the child to go to the mall,

they do not have to provide the childs favorite cereal, or other favorite foods, not even icecream is required.... nor are birthday presents or Christmas presents required to be given out......

this Parents rights thing can be taken both ways.....

if you feel the parent does not have the right to do something, then you may wish to look at it from a differant angle and see what the childs absolutes are..... Not Many....

in my house, it is my rules, my children obey them, if they dont they loose privilages..... my oldest did not believe me, and lost his golf and bowling and even his car keys ( he bought the car )..... I have that right in my house.....

my sons also know that the punishment at home is slight compared to the punishment that he would receive if he done something and the civil authorities got ahold of him and he went to the big house.......

my children obey me, not from fear of reprisal, but out of love, i rarely have to tell them to do something, most the time i can ask and the task will be done...

mike

[hippo's hope is HIM]

Nicks girl, that was my question..I by no means, in any way intended to offend you. I do not look down upon you for your age, I was mainly just asking the parents. I appreciate your responses, as I have previously said. If I hurt you I do apologize and seek your forgiveness. And I have not pushed them aside, as all comments and replies I thoroughly think about them.

SteveHut. I haven't hidden anything from them. With much reluctance, I opened up to them and told them things I never intended too.

As I state again, this is not about obediance, and this is not about rebellion. I fear that you have all taken me the wrong way in this. I did not mean this question to undermine or second guess my parents or anything. I simply wanted to know where parents come from, and their motives and such. What rights that they claim to have......it was a simple question really, and I am sorry it was misunderstood.

So to rephrase what you all have said. The parents have a right to raise their child as they see fit? They have the right to discipline their children, they have the right to raise us. The children's privelges are in the parents hands, they are not required to do anything, but do so out of love. Apparently according to you Nicksgirl that obediance and submission goes hand in hand with the way the parent treats the children, and one should honor and respect their parents.

I mean duh. I know that God calls me to honor, respect, and obey my parents.

I just was unsure about what rights they always claim to have. That they always are adament about throwing it in my face when they don't agree with something I want to do, or what I believe ect.

Maybe their rules are different. You parents are submissive to the Word of God, mine however are not. Maybe this is the key difference.

Again, thanks for your responses.

[nebula]

I just was unsure about what rights they always claim to have. That they always are adament about throwing it in my face when they don't agree with something I want to do, or what I believe ect.

Maybe their rules are different. You parents are submissive to the Word of God, mine however are not. Maybe this is the key difference.

Well, I'm not a parent, but I am an adult. I don't know what that counts me as.

But as I am reading this, I can understand your struggle. My parents did not become Chritians until sometime when I was in elementary school - and I believe I surrendered my life to the Lord at my young age even before they did! My dad was zealous for the Lord for a few years after becoming a Christian for real, but my mom was a bit so-so. Then the pressures of life got the better of my dad and I saw less and less of his zeal manifested. This hurt me. When I was in high school, he even got on my case about me doing my Bible studies before my homework (he wanted me to do my homework first! :glasses: )

I sincerely believe my desire to pursue the Lord was stronger than my parents', and it completely frustrated me. I wanted to look up to them as my spiritual authorities, but I couldn't because they weren't giving me that. And I hated it! I wanted to feel safe seeking their counsel, but everytime I did I regretted it. And my dad, too, would get mad at me if I thought different from him. Why couldn't he respect my ability to think for myself and come to my own conclusions?

And I wasn't trying to be a rebellious child. But I had to be me and not a carbon copy of him (which is what I felt he wanted me to be).

So, as I am reading these responses, it is bringing back the pain of what I went through. Although in principle I agree, in practice things are not so simple.

If the government, whom I am commanded to obey, tells me I cannot pray in public, do I submit to the governement's rule?

See my point?

[hippo's hope is HIM]

Well, I'm not a parent, but I am an adult.  I don't know what that counts me as.

But as I am reading this, I can understand your struggle.  My parents did not become Chritians until sometime when I was in elementary school - and I believe I surrendered my life to the Lord at my young age even before they did!  My dad was zealous for the Lord for a few years after becoming a Christian for real, but my mom was a bit so-so.  Then the pressures of life got the better of my dad and I saw less and less of his zeal manifested.  This hurt me.  When I was in high school, he even got on my case about me doing my Bible studies before my homework  (he wanted me to do my homework first! :glasses: )

I sincerely believe my desire to pursue the Lord was stronger than my parents', and it completely frustrated me.  I wanted to look up to them as my spiritual authorities, but I couldn't because they weren't giving me that.  And I hated it!  I wanted to feel safe seeking their counsel, but everytime I did I regretted it.  And my dad, too, would get mad at me if I thought different from him.  Why couldn't he respect my ability to think for myself and come to my own conclusions?

And I wasn't trying to be a rebellious child.  But I had to be me and not a carbon copy of him (which is what I felt he wanted me to be).

So, as I am reading these responses, it is bringing back the pain of what I went through.  Although in principle I agree, in practice things are not so simple.

If the government, whom I am commanded to obey, tells me I cannot pray in public, do I submit to the governement's rule?

See my point?

Amen!!!!

Neb, yet again yo have hit the nail on the head. That is exactly how I feel.

Only I do not understand the last of your statements. The government tells us not to pray in public and yet we do....so are you saying if my parents tell me not to do something spirtual i.e. praying/reading bible after homework, that evern though I don't like it, I should do it any way? <<Maybe lol.

and yes!! you count! but so did she. But did you see my reasoning for wanting adults/ parents? Not that us youth are dumb, or can't offer new perspective, I just wanted to strictly hear what you older folks had to say

and again, thank you Nicks Girl. :hug: I am honestly thankful that you replied.

Thanks Neb :hug: You are too

God bless you guys.

[nebula]

If the government, whom I am commanded to obey, tells me I cannot pray in public, do I submit to the governement's rule?

See my point?

Only I do not understand the last of your statements. The government tells us not to pray in public and yet we do....so are you saying if my parents tell me not to do something spirtual i.e. praying/reading bible after homework, that evern though I don't like it, I should do it any way? <<Maybe lol.

I'm sorry, I got a little confused at your confusion. I'll just say this, and maybe our thoughts will connect.

Obedience and submission to the Lord always comes first. Look at Daniel and Hannaniah, Mishael and Azariah (otherwise known as Shaddrack, Meshack and Abednigo). Or come to think of it, did you read the thread from a woman who was wondering if she should get baptised now or wait until her parents were able to be there? ( LINK ) If not, you should read it. The Lord revealed something to her that I believe will become beneficial to you.

Bottom line - and I know this is a tight rope and you need the Lord's wisdom here - you do need to submit to your parents' authority where authority is due but not to their sin. Then ask the Lord for wisdom to discern the difference and wisdom for how to stand in this and how to show love to your parents but not bowing to any "false gods."

Is that more clear?

:hug:

[hippo's hope is HIM]

yes ma'm that is more clear. Thanks.

[Work in Progress]

Legally, you are still a minor if you are under 18. Even if you are over 18 and still live with your parents, you are to obey them. The only time you wouldn't is if what they're telling you goes against God.

I never had a lock on my bedroom door growing up and my parents came and went as they pleased but I understood that it was their house. I respected their rules, washed my own clothes, bought my own food, paid rent when I got a job, and could NOT DATE ANYONE. My dad monitored all incoming and outgoing phone calls and sometimes eavesdropped on me. While this may seem strict, I can see why they did it which was for my own good. I couldn't get into as much trouble as I would have liked.

[Guest LadyC]

LOL WIP, since my daughter is headed for the marine corp boot camp next month, the little story you just told strikes me as particularly humourous!