Lonely Christian

[Dennis1209]

As coincidence would have it, this is the subject we're studying this quarter in Sunday School. If my church is typical, only 25% of those who regularly attend worship service attend Sunday School. Some of the topics of this quarters lessons are; becoming a welcoming church, what are you communicating, our lives should serve as a welcome mat, beyond a friendly handshake, love in hospitality, go out of your way to love others, going where they are, you get the idea. I don't think these are natural behaviors, I believe these are learned and born again behaviors. 

Admittedly, as a Christian and church member, I've dropped the ball on this one big time. We're not brothers and sisters in Christ just when we attend services and gatherings, we're all spiritually related as children in the family of God. Speaking of myself, in the flesh I tend to gravitate more towards people I have the most in common with (interests, in age, etc.). Over time, it seems that little "clicks" form in the church based on human nature and the rest of the family gets ignored and is not inclusive sometimes.

I believe a Bible believing, Gospel preaching welcoming friendly community church is a great blessing. When we live, work and worship in the same locality and community; we can be more available, closer, know more of what's going on and the needs of others and more responsive to the needs of an individual and/or community.

I've always been the type of person who might suspect or want to reach out to someone who may seem to me that needs help, or just a visit and conversation. I've always been hesitant thinking; I don't want to stick my nose into where it doesn't belong, that they would get the impression I was spying on them, trying to catch them at something, or interfering with their privacy and imposing myself on them. A wrong attitude on my part.

These lessons I'm learning are opening my eyes to things I've neglected and didn't pay much attention to. 

LONELY CHRISTIAN: Please don't give up. The Lord loves you beyond measure and has a plan and purpose for your life (all of our lives). Our churches will not be perfect until the Lord's return. As loving church members we are still sinners and have our shortcomings and neglect many of our responsibilities and duties. The Bible is very clear about the importance of our all inclusive Christian fellowship and supporting one another. The only advice I could offer would be to take it to the Lord in prayer. Maybe talk in confidence to your Pastor or a church member about your loneliness or other things you need assistance with. It hurts and is sad that we as individuals and churches are falling short as followers of Jesus, and neglecting many of our responsibilities and Christian duties. 

[PurpleNight]

I find that finding a smaller church helps. sometimes they have bible studies or book clubs in small groups like mens or womens study. This I try to do though there is no one my age that is there. beyond that, I just go to books. There are lots of christians who write books or even study bibles that i find nice. Its some kind of communication and online forums and social sites however that is more like hi as you are passing by usually.
Its worse if your socializing skills aren't good for one reason or another. 

[Dennis1209]

20 hours ago, Davida said:

I love it that your Church offers Sunday school for adults and those are great topics. The church I attend doesn't offer any such classes because we are so very tiny. 

Hi Davida,

We're not very big ourselves, around 40 people attending Sunday morning worship, and about only 10 that attend Sunday School. Of which the overwhelming majority of the congregation is seniors like myself. 

I've attended a few local churches around here in our local community (Baptist) for various events. The age groups are virtually identical, with very few younger adults and few children. Discounting the mega churches, prosperity Gospel churches and 'tickle your ear' churches... I'm wondering if Gospel preaching church attendance in America is way down, if there will be enough young people coming up to even keep our church doors open? Around our area there have been a number of church closures recently for lack of support / attendance.

Jesus asked a question and said something very interesting below in 18: 8b. I'm thinking this might also be a reference to His church?

Luke 18:8 (KJV) I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?

[walla299]

4 hours ago, Dennis1209 said:

Hi Davida,

We're not very big ourselves, around 40 people attending Sunday morning worship, and about only 10 that attend Sunday School. Of which the overwhelming majority of the congregation is seniors like myself. 

I've attended a few local churches around here in our local community (Baptist) for various events. The age groups are virtually identical, with very few younger adults and few children. Discounting the mega churches, prosperity Gospel churches and 'tickle your ear' churches... I'm wondering if Gospel preaching church attendance in America is way down, if there will be enough young people coming up to even keep our church doors open? Around our area there have been a number of church closures recently for lack of support / attendance.

Jesus asked a question and said something very interesting below in 18: 8b. I'm thinking this might also be a reference to His church?

Luke 18:8 (KJV) I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?

The church I'm part of is really small also, but many of the senior members have either moved or passed away. There are still families with kids and some of those are going off to college.

I remember when I was younger there was always a more even age mix in the churches I went to. Everyone from babies through seniors was there, but not so much any more - at least not if you're at a church where the Bible is still taught as the Word of God. That's not to say all churches are like that as I'm sure there are still exceptions and I'm grateful to God for them.

I guess my rambling point is this:

The verse you quoted brought something to mind about prayer. The older believers in the churches I've been part of over the years almost always had a small group of real prayer warriors. These were the ones that prayed for everyone (and the ones you didn't want praying for you if you were rebellious!) So many of these folks have gone home to Christ I have to wonder if part of the problem at many churches isn't the lack of both individual and corporate prayer. I've not seen a midweek prayer meeting listed for many churches here in years.

I little to no fellowship in many churches here, so I was forced to find it elsewhere because believers are not meant to be lone wolves and we do not do well without others. I suppose that's why Jesus compared us to sheep, who also don't do well without others of their kind.

[Mike Mclees]

35 minutes ago, walla299 said:

The church I'm part of is really small also, but many of the senior members have either moved or passed away. There are still families with kids and some of those are going off to college.

I remember when I was younger there was always a more even age mix in the churches I went to. Everyone from babies through seniors was there, but not so much any more - at least not if you're at a church where the Bible is still taught as the Word of God. That's not to say all churches are like that as I'm sure there are still exceptions and I'm grateful to God for them.

I guess my rambling point is this:

The verse you quoted brought something to mind about prayer. The older believers in the churches I've been part of over the years almost always had a small group of real prayer warriors. These were the ones that prayed for everyone (and the ones you didn't want praying for you if you were rebellious!) So many of these folks have gone home to Christ I have to wonder if part of the problem at many churches isn't the lack of both individual and corporate prayer. I've not seen a midweek prayer meeting listed for many churches here in years.

I little to no fellowship in many churches here, so I was forced to find it elsewhere because believers are not meant to be lone wolves and we do not do well without others. I suppose that's why Jesus compared us to sheep, who also don't do well without others of their kind.

I am not a lone wolf. I have fellowship. I need to be around other believers I am a non denominationalist but I attend a small Baptist church that is close by. I don't go to be a Baptist or any other traditional church. My greatest strength is spending time With my Lord. I am with the body of Christ right here an now. 

[enoob57]

On ‎10‎/‎8‎/‎2018 at 9:46 PM, TechEnthusiast said:

One of the main reasons that I write this is for other people who are struggling with loneliness. There is at least another person out there who understands what your going through. I have found over the years that if you have no car, money, or family. You will largely be left alone except for perhaps holidays. Church isn't really good at giving a home for single poorer people. Generally the excuses are I have a job and a family I have no time. Another one is nobody spends any time with anyone else because everyone is busy. You will get a lot of your never alone God is always with you. You may even get you have made peoples love your idol. I don't think others understand that being close to other Christians is very important. This means wayy more than 15 minutes on Sunday after the service. They don't get that its hard to grow without real and true community. I think a lot of well meaning people just want to have it all in this life. They think that just because they don't pursue millions of dollars or fame that that means that they aren't pursuing this life. Yet they spend almost 0 time with people who can't give anything to them. The real reason why singles don't go to church is there is seriously not a home for them there. There won't be many invitations to come over and hang out after church. There won't be many come hang out with us during the week. I am not saying this to depress anyone and I truly hope that you and I find a place where professing Christians will truly be our family. Don't be surprised if you encounter this. Also, don't give up God. The story of the poor man Lazarus used to really terrify me, but now it is a reminder that yes God does love me(and you)even if the church won't make us a part of their family.

This is not how the Church functions! You go and make it apart of your life regardless... I have found many with your experience looked for parameters set by themselves that cannot be found in Scripture of what the church should or should no be doing.... for one- no one going to church to get is starting off on good grounds with God before going! We go to church to the obedience knowing it is God's will for us to be there and whatever God decides to do with us while there is awesome for it is God working within us to do according to His Will for us! I am fat, homely, single man that loves God and I came to The Church where I am to love and serve those within it... whatever I give out God gives back to me in an abundance that breaks my heart … and … binds my heart to the children of God without judgment and theirs to me in a unity that can only be from the hand of God in keeping His Word to us There are some points to be of concern- If they are found to be in gross doctrinal error I would seek out another because you cannot be in fellowship with a demonic influence!

[walla299]

2 minutes ago, Mike Mclees said:

I am not a lone wolf. I have fellowship. I need to be around other believers I am a non denominationalist but I attend a small Baptist church that is close by. I don't go to be a Baptist or any other traditional church. My greatest strength is spending time With my Lord. I am with the body of Christ right here an now. 

I never said you were a lone wolf. Sorry if it may have sounded that way. I said we believers are not meant to be lone wolves. We do not do well alone. Fellowship with other believers, where ever it is found is a good thing.

[enoob57]

Prayed... Love, Steven

[Shadow with a shirt on]

He instructs us to come to him as a Child...what is a child like... They present themselves dependent.. they don't speak.. they display no sign of knowing what they need..they are incapable of doing a single thing for themselves.. Crying from what we believe to be an alarm to do a thing for them that we are to do for them...we have to present ourselves to HIM EMPTY...NOT CONCERNED WITH SELF..

[Blood Bought 1953]

12 hours ago, Davida said:

Yes I've recognized too, the deep symbolism in choosing to call us sheep rather then say -- bunnies.  lol,   sheep get lost when they wonder off and are easy prey by wolves and other predators. I mean you can go very deeply into the sheep / lambs metaphor.   

 

 

I have heard from very reliable sources ( it may have been Zola Levitt) that the outstanding characteristic of being  a sheep is to be incredibly stupid......pretty much sums up the human race for me.....lol