A Sincere Question

[Guest]

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

The non believer party acknowledges there is a God. But has no understanding and does not wish to have one of Christ, Holy Spirit or the Bible. He is a good man, decent and rational. But has no interest in being a Christian any time soon. 

The woman belongs to Christ. He is her everything, her foundation for life. Her wish is to spread His message and bring souls to Him. Church going and truly believing that Bible is the Word of God. 

She loves the man. Wants nobody else. But will marriage work? She is praying for guidance before taking that step. 

Answer me truthfully. What is your view? 

 

 

Edited December 16, 2018 by Melinda12

[walla299]

On 12/16/2018 at 10:08 AM, Melinda12 said:

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

The non believer party acknowledges there is a God. But has no understanding and does not wish to have one of Christ, Holy Spirit or the Bible. He is a good man, decent and rational. But has no interest in being a Christian any time soon. 

The woman belongs to Christ. He is her everything, her foundation for life. Her wish is to spread His message and bring souls to Him. Church going and truly believing that Bible is the Word of God. 

She loves the man. Wants nobody else. But will marriage work? She is praying for guidance before taking that step. 

Answer me truthfully. What is your view? 

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

Nope, not for the long term. 

Maryjane beat me to the Scripture as to why. Notice the comparison between light and darkness in 2 Corinthians 6:14. The two are polar opposites. Light drives out darkness and the two cannot coexist in the example. A marriage with one partner lost and one saved also won't work very well because each partner's life is being pulled in opposite directions that will never meet, and a marriage is supposed to be about two people growing together (and dying to self) as some have described it. 

I've personally known quite a few couples over the years who got married . . . and the believer was miserable. If it wasn't something on the natural side of things, then they were miserable spiritually. There was always some kind of conflict about something in many cases. How does the lost partner react to the kids being taken to church, etc.? I've also seen quite a few testimonies here on the forums about the misery being unequally yoked can cause - and its almost always the believer who suffers or is brought down spiritually. Sometimes the lost partner does get saved - but generally speaking they find all kinds of reasons to justify their choices in their partners behavior and "hypocrisy." In one case the lost partner got "saved," and went through the motions for awhile, but their life never really changed and they left church and their family not long after. It usually does not end well in most cases.

[wingnut-]

28 minutes ago, Melinda12 said:

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

The non believer party acknowledges there is a God. But has no understanding and does not wish to have one of Christ, Holy Spirit or the Bible. He is a good man, decent and rational. But has no interest in being a Christian any time soon. 

The woman belongs to Christ. He is her everything, her foundation for life. Her wish is to spread His message and bring souls to Him. Church going and truly believing that Bible is the Word of God. 

She loves the man. Wants nobody else. But will marriage work? She is praying for guidance before taking that step. 

Answer me truthfully. What is your view? 

 

 

 

Most likely not.  For a believer God comes first, this will eventually cause friction with the unbelieving spouse who will not like sitting second chair.

[JustPassingThru]

1 hour ago, Melinda12 said:

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

You've been given good advice, all I can add is, ...her spiritual father-in-law will be the devil.

My question is, ...if Jesus is her everything why is she even considering rebelling against His Word, ...this could be a test to show her where her heart truly is.

Our desire is always stronger than our intellect, so to avoid much heartache and pain, tell her to cleave to the Word. 

Father said, "it's not good that man be alone, I'll make a helpmate for Him," she is being formed into the woman for the man Father has chosen for her, in faith she must believe it, and may I suggest you tell her to continue to immerse herself in church work and in His timing...

Lord bless   

[Sower]

1 hour ago, Melinda12 said:

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

Answer me truthfully. What is your view?

My view, my experience. At our church over many years I have known several female/believers members who were married to lost husbands. It is usually the wife trying to bring the husband, the majority of the time. I believe the wives were saved after the marriage. Occasionally some husbands would attend, but then later, not. After a time, the wife, growing, enthusiastically involved, thirsting for Christian fellowship, would eventually not show up, for whatever reason. Sad.  I do remember there were some couples that I still know that were saved at different times after marriage, as in my case, and many couples I know also.

Based upon the fact that there be few that enter therein, it is dangerous ground to ignore God's explicit warnings.
 

[R. Hartono]

Not good

[UnprofitableServantJames]

My personal two cents would be to ask what is God saying. God gives clear instructions found in the Bible about this subject. Many of which have already been quoted, so I won't parrot what has already been shared. I would just question the woman's motives, and ask what is the purpose of marriage? Is she getting married because it is God's will, or is she getting married because she wants to get married? This is an important question to be answered if this 'lady' wants to hear a Godly response.

In peace

[Spookycolt]

On ‎12‎/‎16‎/‎2018 at 10:08 AM, Melinda12 said:

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

The non believer party acknowledges there is a God. But has no understanding and does not wish to have one of Christ, Holy Spirit or the Bible. He is a good man, decent and rational. But has no interest in being a Christian any time soon. 

The woman belongs to Christ. He is her everything, her foundation for life. Her wish is to spread His message and bring souls to Him. Church going and truly believing that Bible is the Word of God. 

She loves the man. Wants nobody else. But will marriage work? She is praying for guidance before taking that step. 

Answer me truthfully. What is your view? 

 

 

To be honest, we are all still learning about God, we all work to fulfill his wishes, its never done. 

 

Is she any worse than me or am I better than you? 

 

There is no goal that any of us will ever achieve, its all about levels so at what point do you say that someone isn't at the level where you can't marry them? 

 

Is there a test we take? 

 

No there isn't. 

 

I think, and I really believe this, that unless she is totally denying God then she is in the struggle with us, she just hasn't found a path yet. 

 

Probably more of a reason to marry her. 

[JTC]

On 12/16/2018 at 12:08 PM, Melinda12 said:

Can marriage between a truly committed Christian and a non-believer really work? 

The non believer party acknowledges there is a God. But has no understanding and does not wish to have one of Christ, Holy Spirit or the Bible. He is a good man, decent and rational. But has no interest in being a Christian any time soon. 

The woman belongs to Christ. He is her everything, her foundation for life. Her wish is to spread His message and bring souls to Him. Church going and truly believing that Bible is the Word of God. 

She loves the man. Wants nobody else. But will marriage work? She is praying for guidance before taking that step. 

Answer me truthfully. What is your view? 

Hi Melinda, you are brave to have asked us. I'm sorry but I have to agree with the majority opinion here. I know this is tough for you to accept but you're better off to walk away now than after years of fighting. Whenever a relationship starts out as being against God's word it ends bad. Another example is when a married person leaves their mate for another person without just cause. Again, I say I'm sorry but don't do it.

 

 

[Spookycolt]

This is a tough one. 

 

We know what the Bible says but it says many things. 

 

Isn't giving up the one "you are supposed to be with" also turning your back on them? 

 

Can't God use you to change them? 

 

Does saying that I can't date you or marry you because you don't believe instill an elite status upon us, which God definitely forbids? 

 

My point is that God has rules we need to follow and this is one but you should make sure that its not the only criteria and that you might be breaking other rules by following it. 

 

I don't think that marrying someone who isn't a Christian is bad because I think if he is a bad choice that God will give you plenty of other obvious reasons not to marry. 

 

You will see them if you look. 

 

Or hopefully you won't and you found the perfect mate.