I Talked My Mom Out Of Going Into Assisted Living.

[LadyKay]

So my mom for some reason has been for the pas month or so become interesting in going into assisted living. I do not know what her reason for this is. She is fully independent and can live on her own. She is living in a small condo and has condo workers who do all the yard work and fix anything that needs fixing. She cooks, cleans, pays her bills dose everything on her own.  But for so reason she came up with this idea that she could go to assisted living in the winter, then come back home in the summer.  Well after a few phone calls I found out it dose not work that way. Because she has Medicaid, she will be forced to sell her condo. So no going back once your out. Also, the assisted living place takes all your money and give you only $50.00 a month. The person I talked to justified all of this by saying that they provide all the meals, utilities, and housing so they don't really need any other money. Then also because of Covid-19 right now. She would not be allowed to go out anywhere.  I fond this all rather shocking. I mean the fact that they take all your money and just give you $50.00 a month. Can't even buy Christmas gifts for that.  When I explain all of this to my mom she agreed that this was not the way to go right now.  Wow is all I have to say to that. Just Wow! 

[Bandersnatch]

9 minutes ago, LadyKay said:

So my mom for some reason has been for the pas month or so become interesting in going into assisted living. I do not know what her reason for this is. She is fully independent and can live on her own. She is living in a small condo and has condo workers who do all the yard work and fix anything that needs fixing. She cooks, cleans, pays her bills dose everything on her own.  But for so reason she came up with this idea that she could go to assisted living in the winter, then come back home in the summer.  Well after a few phone calls I found out it dose not work that way. Because she has Medicaid, she will be forced to sell her condo. So no going back once your out. Also, the assisted living place takes all your money and give you only $50.00 a month. The person I talked to justified all of this by saying that they provide all the meals, utilities, and housing so they don't really need any other money. Then also because of Covid-19 right now. She would not be allowed to go out anywhere.  I fond this all rather shocking. I mean the fact that they take all your money and just give you $50.00 a month. Can't even buy Christmas gifts for that.  When I explain all of this to my mom she agreed that this was not the way to go right now.  Wow is all I have to say to that. Just Wow! 

BOTH of you need legal advice.

 

Making an appointment and setting up something like a "Quick Claim Deed" will save you more money than the charge for legal services. Actually, it is a way to "buy peace of mind" 

Get a recommendation from your local Bar Association, or an organization like the nearest  Agency on Aging. My intuition tells me that there may be more to this than she is letting on.

[ReneeIW]

That’s good that your mom trusts you and listens. Some parents can be stubborn!

[LadyKay]

30 minutes ago, Bandersnatch said:

BOTH of you need legal advice.

Well no we don't. As we are not going through with this.  So as of now I see no need for any legal advice. 

Edited October 2, 2020 by LadyKay

[Salvation67]

58 minutes ago, LadyKay said:

So my mom for some reason has been for the pas month or so become interesting in going into assisted living. I do not know what her reason for this is. She is fully independent and can live on her own. She is living in a small condo and has condo workers who do all the yard work and fix anything that needs fixing. She cooks, cleans, pays her bills dose everything on her own.  But for so reason she came up with this idea that she could go to assisted living in the winter, then come back home in the summer.  Well after a few phone calls I found out it dose not work that way. Because she has Medicaid, she will be forced to sell her condo. So no going back once your out. Also, the assisted living place takes all your money and give you only $50.00 a month. The person I talked to justified all of this by saying that they provide all the meals, utilities, and housing so they don't really need any other money. Then also because of Covid-19 right now. She would not be allowed to go out anywhere.  I fond this all rather shocking. I mean the fact that they take all your money and just give you $50.00 a month. Can't even buy Christmas gifts for that.  When I explain all of this to my mom she agreed that this was not the way to go right now.  Wow is all I have to say to that. Just Wow! 

Yes, Wow is all I can come with also!! LOL  If I had been you, I would have flat out said NO Mom, not as long as you are able to do for yourself......I am so thankful God allowed my Mom to live and pass away in her own home.   I miss my Mom

[Bandersnatch]

11 hours ago, LadyKay said:

11 hours ago, Bandersnatch said:

BOTH of you need legal advice.

Well no we don't. As we are not going through with this.  So as of now I see no need for any legal advice. 

Edited 11 hours ago by LadyKay

I wrote what I wrote about a half day before you posted your snarky, scolding comment. Therefore, I had on indication that you both changed your mind.. If this is how you treat another poster who gave correct answer based upon personal experiences, then please refrain from asking anyone on any forum to assist your decision-making  :-(

 

[Bandersnatch]

I wrote what I wrote about a half day before you posted your snarky, scolding comment. Therefore, I had on indication that you both changed your mind.. If this is how you treat another poster who gave correct answer based upon personal experiences, then please refrain from asking anyone on any forum to assist your decision-making  :-(

 

 

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[JohnR7]

16 hours ago, LadyKay said:

So my mom for some reason has been for the pas month or so become interesting in going into assisted living.

They have assisted living that is very much like living in a condo.  Also if she has money she can hire someone to come in. Sometimes I will hire a nursing student or someone for two or three hours to help me with things around the house. There is a web site, care dot com where people are listed. My wife works in assisted living and she is always complaining about people wanting her to do stuff for them. I do not think they get that well taken care of. Sometimes they have two people trying to take care of 30 people and they pay lot of money for that. People will work for ten to 15 dollars an hour and you can even get a registered nurse for $20 sometimes. That is a lot cheaper then the $6000 a month for assisted living. 

Edited October 3, 2020 by JohnR7

[appy]

The only thing I can suggest, is to have you seek the legal advice from an attorney that specializes in "elder laws".  He or she is in the best position and knowledge to give advice in regard to your mom's legal rights regarding long term medical care or assisted living.

[other one]

23 hours ago, LadyKay said:

So my mom for some reason has been for the pas month or so become interesting in going into assisted living. I do not know what her reason for this is. She is fully independent and can live on her own. She is living in a small condo and has condo workers who do all the yard work and fix anything that needs fixing. She cooks, cleans, pays her bills dose everything on her own.  But for so reason she came up with this idea that she could go to assisted living in the winter, then come back home in the summer.  Well after a few phone calls I found out it dose not work that way. Because she has Medicaid, she will be forced to sell her condo. So no going back once your out. Also, the assisted living place takes all your money and give you only $50.00 a month. The person I talked to justified all of this by saying that they provide all the meals, utilities, and housing so they don't really need any other money. Then also because of Covid-19 right now. She would not be allowed to go out anywhere.  I fond this all rather shocking. I mean the fact that they take all your money and just give you $50.00 a month. Can't even buy Christmas gifts for that.  When I explain all of this to my mom she agreed that this was not the way to go right now.  Wow is all I have to say to that. Just Wow! 

Mom and Dad moved into assissted living before they died, but they had the money to pay for it themselves.   the two of them was about $7,000 a month.

Was kind of like living in a nice motel...    Maybe some day when I can't do for myself, but for that much money we could stay in an inside room on most Cruise ships and be treated like royalty.