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Nyoka

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Nyoka last won the day on October 4 2010

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About Nyoka

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  • Birthday 01/25/1963

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  1. I know that if I am wrong on the following then there are plenty of mature knowledgable christians on here to correct me and I always welcome correction when I am shown to be wrong. I know we are all human and can make mistakes at times. I am not talking about those who make a mistake that they truely repent of and would never do again. I know there have been times when I have got angry over something my husband has said or done and then later realised I was wrong. I have always looked to the bible to guide me on how we are to treat our family members and what is godly behaviour toward them. One verse that has always struck me as powerful over this is: 1Ti 5:8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel. I am no Greek scholar but Strongs definition of the term 'provide not for' is: προνοέω pronoeō pron-o-eh'-o From G4253 and G3539; to consider in advance, that is, look out for beforehand (active voice by way of maintenance for others; middle voice by way of circumspection for oneself): - provide (for). This suggests to me that we should always have the welfare and wellbeing of our family first and formost in our thinking and actions toward them. I do understand we all make mistakes and are not perfect yet so I am not talking about someone who has made a dreadful mistake and is turely repentant and would never do it again but two questions do occur to me over this verse: 1) Is someone who is committing adultery truely looking out for family first? 2) Is somone who is abusing their family truely looking out for their family first? To be honest I don't see how they could be. If that is the case then this verse does tell us that they have denied the faith and anyone that denies the faith is an unbeliever no matter what they call themselves. Their fruits have given them away as to what they truely are in their hearts. Jesus does back us up in this when he tells us the two great commandments: Mat 22:37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. Mat 22:38 This is the first and great commandment. Mat 22:39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. Is abuse showing love for your family? No it is not. Is adultery showing love for your spouse/family? No it is not. Abuse and adultery do not show the fruit of the Spirit either: Gal 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,Gal 5:23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law; Eph 5:9 (For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth). What is good and righteous about abuse and adultery? Nothing. So if I am right then an abuser or an adulterer is denying the faith and no more than an unbeliever trying to pretend to be a believer so in that case this verse would apply: 1Co 7:15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. I do believe that Jesus gives us the verses about divorce as He knows that the reasons for divorce can, often, can lead us away from Him and all Gods promises. These are just my own opinions fwiw.
  2. Nyoka

    Pride

    I know excatly where you're at as I have been there done that and got the t-shirt lol. When I came to God I was so full of pride. God had to do a lot of work in me to get me where I am now - I come from a very proud, manipulative, vengeful family of athiests. I hope all pride is gone from me but I am not silly as I know somewhere I probably have some left but am now content to wait till God shows me where it is and what to do about it. When God first started to show me how to deal with pride He first showed me this scripture so I would learn what humility was: 1Pe 5:5 Likewise, younger ones, be subject to older ones, and all being subject to one another. Put on humility. For God resists proud ones, but He gives grace to the humble. 1Pe 5:6 Therefore be humbled under the mighty hand of God, so that He may exalt you in due time. According to Strongs the word for humility here means: G5424 φρήν phrēn frane Probably from an obsolete φρáω phraō (to rein in or curb; compare G5420); the midrif (as a partition of the body), that is, (figuratively and by implication of sympathy) the feelings (or sensitive nature; by extension [also in the plural] the mind or cognitive faculties): - understanding. According to this it is our mind and feelings we need to bring under control of God. This also lines up with another verse God showed me at the time: 2Co 10:3 For though walking about in flesh, we do not war according to flesh. 2Co 10:4 For the weapons of our warfare are not fleshly, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds, 2Co 10:5 pulling down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought into the obedience of Christ. This showed me that anything we do or say starts first with a thought. Pride also starts first with a thought so our mind will and emotions is where we must fight this battle. I also needed to know why I needed to do this as, to me at that time, I could see no wrong in the prideful way I thought. I was shown the 'why' is because we have an enemy who wants to condemn us in what ever way he can: 1Pe 5:8 Be sensible and vigilant, because your adversary the Devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking someone he may devour. As a new believer I was unsure how to do this so I did the only thing I knew to do. I spent three months with God. How I did this was I spent the time dedicated to God. Apart from what I needed to do for daily living I spent every spare moment reading and studying the bible, talking with other believers (forums help here lol), leaning all I could of God and who He says I am and what He says I am to do and/or believe. I soon found that it is very true that what you give importance to is what you will follow. If anyone told me I needed to to believe this or do that to follow God I would ask them to show me from the bible, or try to find it myself, and if they couldn't, or I couldn't find it, I left it for now but asked God to bring it back to me later if it was something I needed to learn. I found out that sometimes I didn't find it or see it in the bible because I didn't know enough to find it and needed to learn more. You have made a good start by asking and now you need to study, learn, ask questions when stuck and then, most important, apply what you learn, trusting God to do what you can't yet, no matter if you seem to be failing a lot or not. Remember it takes time to learn a new way and leave old ways and habits behind so don't be hard on yourself if you mess it up some. Instead pick yourself up, dust yourself off and try again taking only the lesson learnt with you. Hope this helps.
  3. My son has been handcuffed and taken to jail when he was five. He was beating his sisters up with anything he could find and doing all he could to punish me and them when we would not give in and let him have his own way. The last straw came when he and his mates burnt a shed down. I went to the police and asked them if they could help me put a stop to this. They asked me how far they could go with him and I said cuff him and throw him in jail for a few hours to show him that his behaviour was not acceptable. They did just that and my son was a changed boy after that. He is in his twenties now and still says that what I did turned him round and got him on the right path as it really scared him like nothing else did. And before anyone says anything about how I parented him I did use all the usual punishments for him to stop the behaviour, from time out to taking things away from him, and they didn't work as he didn't believe he had to listen to me over anything. I was also relying very much on God during this time and only went to the police after much prayer and thought. It is not always the parents fault when a child chooses to do wrong. I am not saying it is or isn't the parents fault in the case of this child just that we are sometimes to quick to blame the parents when they have tried everything to stop the child and nothing worked.
  4. Ty. My husband I learnt this after many problems in our marriage and now we live this out everyday and our marriage is so much better and stronger. Yes we do still have the odd problem but my husband is truly head of myself and our children but I am very much his helper and the other half of himself and together we let God rule over us and guide us in our marriage. This has made our marriage a marriage beyond compare.
  5. The bible tells wives to submit to their husbands: Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Eph 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. This does not mean that the husband gets to lord it over the wife in a dominating manner. What it means is that just as Jesus submited to His Father in love and trust in His Father so wives should submit to their husband in the same manner. The wife must love her husband and be willing to sacrifice all for him. Now if the husband is not being the Godly head of the house then the wife has every right to stand up and say that what he is doing is wrong. And also to correct Him in love and gentleness - just as the husband can with the wife. Now the piece that often gets forgotten here is that God has given instructions to the husband to: Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for it. Now this tells the husbands that they have to love their wives just as Jesus loved the church. How did Jesus love the church? He came as a servant to show the church the truth and then to die for the church and He did it out of love for the church. This then is how a husband loves their wife. The husband must love his wife and be willing to sacrifice all for her. What these verses show us is that the relationship is about the husband putting the wife first and thinking of her well being and happiness first before his own and the wife putting the husband first and thinking of his well being and happiness first and putting it before her own. And to complete the marriage God should be the head over both. In a Godly marriage there is no one person trying to be the dominant lord over the other but all are in submission as God wants to Him and each other. That's my thoughts on it anyway fwiw.
  6. good idea nebual. My husband and I are not Bipolar but we do suffer from depression and when it gets bad we also look for ways to channel that to get it out safely. One way we use is worshipping God. My husband finds physical work helps him so he will go and do the gardening or chop wood. I find that making beaded jewellery or playing computer role playing games helps me so I use them, when it gets bad, to help me. Another thing I use is to do bible studies on different words or topics. I find that if it is something you need to concentrate on then it takes your focus off the problem and lets you have a break from it. Hope this helps. Praying
  7. I see this dream a bit differently than the other posters. You say in that in the dream you had your mum pray for you and she prayed the most beautiful prayer you have heard. I don't believe that would have happened if this dream was demonic. Also you talk of the demons but you failed to notice that each time they tried to get near you they were stopped and couldn't touch you. This also would not happen in a demonic dream. Personally I believe that this dream may have been a warning from God to show you exactly what you would get into if you dabbled in lucid dreaming. You may not have realised the spirit behind lucid dreaming so God has shown you to protect you.
  8. Like others I to have a problem with the OP's post. Three times, at least, the same word is used in that chapter: 1Co 14:28 But if there be no interpreter, let him keep silence in the church; and let him speak to himself, and to God. 1Co 14:30 If any thing be revealed to another that sitteth by, let the first hold his peace. 1Co 14:34 Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law. According to Strong's the word the underlined bits are interpreted from is: G4601 σιγάω sigaō see-gah'-o to keep silent (transitive or intransitive): - keep close (secret, silence), hold peace. Now if that word means to keep silent and never utter a word in church then it must also mean the same in the previous verses as they are saying the same thing about two other groups of people - men and prophets. Now if this interpretation is correct then this leaves us in somewhat of a quandry as the only group of people that Paul never told to be quiet in those verses is children. Does this mean that the only people that can utter a sound in church is children? Of course not. If we read this chapter in context we can clearly see that Paul did not mean woman were to never utter a word in church but he did mean that all things were to be done in an orderly fashion. Obviously this was not happening and there was some confusion that Paul was correcting in this one church. Too often people cherry pick verses here and there to support there own beliefs rather than reading those verses in context and letting the Bible form their beliefs. Secondly some people have the idea that Adam was way off somewhere else when Satan tempted Eve. The scripture says different: Gen 3:6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat. Adam was with Eve the whole time Eve was being tempted. Adam could have stepped in at anytime and corrected Eve and put a stop to the temptation of Eve but he chose not to and we never see that he said anything during the time Eve and the serpent were talking. Adam knew what God said but chose to shut up.
  9. I agree oak. Many talk about the love of God and how He wants the best for us as you said. Theses same ones forget that God is also a just God and a wrathful God and a jealous God. We need to take all of God's character and word into account and not just the bits that we like.
  10. I usually say that people cause wars, but that they look for any excuse they can to justify their decision... including religion. Very true. People cause wars. War is caused by greed and power plays. Usually when people go to war against someone it is because that person has got something the other person wants. Also everyone that goes to war using religion as an excuse always says that their 'god' is on their side but no one bothers to ask their 'god' if that is truly what the 'god' wanted. I remember reading a story of an incident in WW2. A bomber was flying over a town getting ready to drop it's load and an anti aircraft gun was getting ready to fire on it. Well the bomber found they couldn't drop their bombs. No matter what they did the bomb bay doors wouldn't open. At the same time the anti aircraft gun crew found they couldn't fire their weapon. Nothing either crew did would get it to work so the anti aircraft gun crew just let the aircraft go and the bomber turned to go home. The anti aircraft crew went to try to shoot the next plane down and the gun worked perfectly and the bomber tried again to release their bombs, when they were away from the anti aircraft gun, and the bombs dropped perfectly. This mystified them for years until years later the crews met up and they found out that the families of the men were praying for God to protect their men. Both crews said they believed God stopped both the plane and the gun from working so they would be protected.
  11. I agree with those who say that before judging others we should examine ourselves. I also believe another component of judging should be love. We see in the gospels that whenever Jesus judged those He knew had rejected him it was to tell them their condemnation - eg the Pharisees. But when He judged those He knew hadn't rejected them it was always in love to show them the truth - eg the woman at the well and the adulteress. As we are told in 1Co 13 all things must be done with love for without love there is only condemnation. Love includes mercy, justice and grace. We show mercy to the person sinning. We give just judgment with the view of restoration to Christ/bringing them to knowledge and acceptance of Christ and showing them the truth so they can turn from the sin - and not condemnation. We show grace when we show the mercy and just judgment. James does tell us that we need to show mercy: Jas 2:13 For he who has shown no mercy shall have judgment without mercy, and mercy exults over judgment. If we expect to receive mercy we must also show mercy. So when we judge others it should always be with the view of showing them were they went wrong so they can repent and turn from it and then in love and truth they can have restoration to Christ or be brought to the knowledge and acceptance of Christ to fellowship with Christ and the body of Christ. There may come a time when we have to say no more and exclude a person from fellowship due to them not wanting to hear the truth but even this should never be done lightly and it should be done after we have tried to show them the truth, in mercy, with the view of restoring them to fellowship/bringing them to Christ still being our goal - if possible.
  12. tigger398 I am glad you came back and talked about things. Tigger you speak of being scared of the future and what may happen. I was that way once until someone showed me that true courage is being scared but doing what God wants us to anyway and trusting in Him even though we are scared. Think of a firefighter dealing with a big fire. That firefighter is not going into that fire without fear. He is scared but he uses that fear to help him by making him stay aware of his surroundings and what is happening so he can run out of the building if need be or if trapped he can stop the panic so he has a better chance of getting out alive. Policemen are the same. Policemen know, as firefighters do, that each situation they encounter may be the one that they get seriously hurt or killed at. But they carry on in spite of the fear so they can do their jobs and protect you and I. It is the same thing with us. Many times I have been scared. Scared of the future, scared of people, scared of whatever but He always brought me through. Now after all the hard years He has given me a season of peace and a wonderful husband to share it with and I know now that no matter what this world, my flesh or satan throws at me my husband and I will get through it and we will have something that was worth fighting for - God with us. Sorry for rambling a bit.
  13. I may be wrong but I would have to say no for several reasons. One is how can someone direct, lead or be part of worshipping someone who they don't believe in. The second is that how can darkness and light mix: 2Co_6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? Welcoming them in so you can teach them about God is fine as we are to preach the gospel to all but they are unbelievers and as such don't believe in God.
  14. I am not in the quake zone but I do have relatives there. There have been 10 aftershocks so far today ranging from 3.2 - 4.7: http://www.geonet.org.nz/earthquake/quakes/recent_quakes.html The size of the quakes has been upgraded to a 5.7 and a 6.3. People in Christchurch and the surrounding districts are shell shocked as the aftershocks have been pretty much non stop since the first earthquake last year. Please pray for God to give them His comfort, peace, joy and strength. It is much needed by them. More buildings have been damaged and 10 people hurt but thankfully no one was killed: http://www.stuff.co.nz/
  15. I was raised an athiest. I was taught that christians were only after foolish, retarded people to get their money and a following to make themselves important. I really knew nothing about God, Jesus, being born again, or any other christian belief. I only came to Christ because someone told me about hell and the lake of fire and I wanted fire insurance in case those 'crazy' christians were right. For the next five years I didn't read the bible, join with a fellowship of any type or do anything to further learn and grow with God because I didn't know I needed to and I didn't trust those 'crazy' christians. I didn't even own a bible during this time. Now when I use the word 'crazy' here you have to understand that this is what I was taught to believe about christians right from when I was little. One day I was cleaning out a cupboard at home and tucked right in the back of it was a bible. I had thoroughly cleaned this place out when I moved in and there was nothing there then so I have no idea how the bible got there. After finding the bible I got a strong urge to watch a televison preacher. I would wake up early so I could go watch him - he was on real early in the morning. Now I have always been one to question everything so whatever he said about the bible I would go back and check in the bible to see if he was right. In this way God got me reading the bible. Then God started bringing other believers across my path and in speaking to them I would also go check the bible to see if they were right and in doing so God taught me to fellowship. Then I had a few years were some real bad things were going on in my life. I didn't know what I was going to do but I knew if this wasn't stopped I would lose everything including my children. I had no one to turn to so I turned to God. I didn't think He could do anything but I knew I had no one else to turn to so He was it. For several months I got up, looked after my children and spent every spare moment with Him. Slowly things turned round and through it I learnt to trust Him and Him alone. Now I have explained all this to say that I believe that when we are born again it is because we have accepted Jesus and the Holy Spirit has come to abide in us. I believe this due to the fact that the bible states over and over that Jesus will abide with us. I also believe it because no one else could have taught me what I had to learn about God to grow in Him - expect God. Due to the distrust of christians I was raised with I would not have listened if a christian had tried to teach me what God did during those early years of being a Christian. The urging and prompting to do what I needed to do had to come from God in me - the Holy spirit. That is what I believe anyway fwiw.
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