Seeking Guidance on Common Law Marriage

[FeministWhoLovesABeliever]

9 hours ago, Coliseum said:

Jesus never came for religion; he came for relationships. What God through Christ desires is to have a personal relationship, through His Spirit, with you.

This is beautiful. 

Quote

. I wonder...have you ever asked God if He was real?

I have prayed to Jesus but not asked this specific question. I will try it tonight. Thank you for the idea and for sharing your experience. 

[Debp]

7 hours ago, FeministWhoLovesABeliever said:

To answer your other questions: I do not believe that Christ is my savior. I've never considered needing a savior before.  It's a new concept for me. It's true that there are quite a few worldly things that I could use some help with. But it seems to me that forgiveness is for the person who was harmed to give? 

I will keep praying. Any specific suggestions for that? The "Jesus, thank you and please" recipe that I've been using hasn't felt very productive to me. 

Can anyone recommend a podcast or other way to tune in to a pastor who they think might appeal to me? 

The reason we need Christ as Savior is because someone still in their sins will never be able to stand after death in the presence of a totally holy God.   When we believe (have faith) on Christ and what He did for us on the cross, a miracle occurs.   We are then born of the Spirit of God....the Holy Spirit indwells us.    And the righteousness of Christ is imputed to us.   So God doesn't see our sins anymore.

 

About praying... another member mentioned that you ask the Lord if He is real.   That Jesus reveal Himself to you.   But be sincere in your asking.   The fastest answered prayer is when we truly call out to the Lord from our hearts.

 

You asked about pastors:  You seem to be an intellectual.   Perhaps you might like Ravi Zacharias.   He is a well known Christian apologist.   Ravi Zacharias has many videos on YouTube.    For regular sermons, you might try Dr. David Jeremiah.

[kwikphilly]

11 hours ago, FeministWhoLovesABeliever said:

I don't already know the responses that I'm getting in this forum. Yours is different and considerably less desirable to me, than some of the others. But I'm not here to find justification of my wants. So I'm equally grateful for your opinion and insight.  

Of course my reply is undesirable but it is honest and I think that it will do much more for you to speak openly & sincerely rather than sugar coat anything,I'm glad you appreciate my response because I truly care about you & your situation. You see,yours isa matter of life & death or I would not have replied here & now ....

   Friend,you said you ARE interested in getting to know his "god" ,my I ask who then is yours?If he is praying & seeking Gods Will & the"hangup" is whether or not it includes you and he thinks it can if you have some sort of religious ceremony(which you describe as a "Christian Marriage")then I can tell you that he is a religious person.You see,firstly God  & Jesus are One in the SAME GOD......many folks call themselves a Christian because they follow religious customs & traditions....a Born Again Christian is a New Creation in Christ Jesus(God the Son)because through his Faith He Received Gods Grace(God the Father) & by the Power of Holy Spirit(God the Spirit) he has been born of spirit.....Jesus Abides in the Born Again Believer

   I know it might sound a little complicated but it isn't at all,there is God Almighty,Creator of Heaven,Earth & all things and He is Holy & Perfect-we all fall short of the Gory of God and none of us  can be made Holy or Perfect by our own effort....we are dead in our sins,only a Perfect Blood Sacrifice could Atone for our sin...so God became flesh(Jesus)to die on the cross in our place.....by Believing in Jesus(God the Son)we Receive the unmerited,undeserved,Grace of God to forgive our sin  that we are made Perfect,Holy ,Pleasing& Acceptable to God(Worthy)......now after Jesus Died on the cross He Also Rose from the dead ,He is ALIVE,our Redeemer LIVES ....and when He Returned to Heaven He sent His Holy Spirit to Indwell us(God the Spirit) ONE GOD(three persons).....so we too are RESURRECTED in spirit!!!As you can see all of this has nothing to do with traditions,customs or Laws.....so what is a CHristian Marriage?

  The union between man & woman becomes Sanctified by God by a Covenant between God,man & woman....they are bound physically,mentally & spiritually....you will not find a marriage ritual anywhere in the Bible as churches perform them,of course there is nothing wrong with having a marriage officiated by law & by church if thats what you prefer but that is not what constitutes a Biblical Marriage.....some will not want to agree but they will have to back it up with Scripture    Two Believers stand before God and commit to each other& God ,then they become one flesh and there you go.....of course we also respect our governing authorities & follow the laws of where we live considering marriage-the end

   Anyway,this is why it is troubling to me concerning your mate,depending on where you live you are already married legally(common law) and he seems to want Gods Permission to be unequally yoked.....if he is Saved (Born Again) then he will never fall out of Gods Grace no matter what & by going into a church to officiate is not going to please God or earn Favor,he can rest in Gods Grace.....

   Now about youOf course I'll pray for you,I'll pray with you too because I'm going to ask you to pray as well......I'm going to pray that Jesus Draw you unto Himself,that He Reveal Himself to you...I cannot even begin to describe to you how much He Loves you..YOU are the very Reason HE Left His Majesty in Heaven & reduced Himself to flesh,to servitude,to die in your place so that you may LIVE ETERNALLY with Him   My Friend Christianity is an intimate,personal Relationship with GOD in Christ Jesus....HE LOvesyou & so do I ,hope to hear back from you                       With love-in Christ<Kwik

[FeministWhoLovesABeliever]

 

 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

Quick answers to your bible questions.

You are indeed 'one flesh' with the man, but you are not joined to him by marriage, because God does not allow an unbeliever and a believer to be married.

God does not allow an unbeliever and a believer to be married? Is there a verse that says this? 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

In Corinthians, where you read that If the unbeliever wants to stay with the saved "HUSBAND", or vice versa,  then she/he should if they are agreeable.   But you see, you were not Married when He became A Christian. So that verse means this.   If 2 people are together, living together, and they are married and one of them gets Saved.. Does the mean they have to part.  A.) No.   But that is not your situation.

Though I don't think it will change your assessment, I do want to clarify that he was Christian when we met and that we built a life together that we both said was permanent. But I think your point is that there wasn't a wedding ceremony. Is that what you are saying causes a woman to become a wife?  And if so, what does Christ want for a woman who, not knowing that a wedding ceremony was required to sanctify her partnership, gave 10 years and sacrificed more than most do for the man she considered to be her husband? 

I am not suggesting that staying with her isn't a sin, only that leaving her is also one. 

I think that, like the Canaanite woman, whose daughter was possessed by a demon, who dared to speak up for herself, after the disciples asked Jesus to cast her away and Jesus himself told her that he wasn't there for her and equated her to being a dog, that Jesus would also say to me "O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire."

 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

 

Adultery is not an issue for you 2 as you are not married..    No worries.

Wrong word. Sorry. But we were both previously married and entered into sexual relationships before our divorces were finalized (but long after they were underway and beyond reversal), so we are adulterers as well.  I have no doubt that our "marriage" is infinitely more sacred than our legal marriages were. I was not one flesh with my husband. He was not one flesh with his wife. 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

When you are in a situation or lifestyle that is not allowed by God' permissive will , then you have to accept that any real answer you get from a biblical standpoint is going to resist your hope.

OK?  Just keeping it real for you.

 

I don't find the biblical god's will "permissive" but I appreciate you keeping it real. 

I had somehow thought that there might be a general consensus. But there doesn't seem to be. You say that we are not married others say that we are. Although frustrating, knowing there is so much room for interpretation makes Christianity a little more accessible to me. So, thank you for that.  

7 hours ago, Behold said:

God does not create standards of morality and ethical boundaries (Commandments) so that He can ruin love or create mindless robots.  He gives rules and regulations so that by  existing inside them, you dont end up in a heartbreaking mess and a completely untenable situation that has no answer that does not torment, long term.   

I think God also makes unattainable standards of morality and ethical boundaries so that none of us can claim to be free from sin. 

 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

The answer that i can give you is not going to make you feel better.... And the answer i give you is not possible for you both to >continue< to do....So, its no answer for you both, as you can't do it... But i'll give you an answer so that you have a final one.

So, if you want to LIVE with this man, you have to do one thing.  You have to stop having sex with Him.   Fornication has to end, now.

If you can't, and i dont think you 2 can,  then you have to stop living with  Him, and just continue the relationship, celibate, and apart.

We are celibate and living apart, while we figure this out. 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

He is under no Spiritual Obligation to stay with you,   He is under no Biblical responsibility to recognize a "common law" marriage, as He is under God's authority FIRST.

I do not want him to stay with me out of obligation. If he takes the opposite view that you do, and believes it to be his responsibility to recognise our marriage, but does not want to be married, than I will divorce him, so that he can be free. I am not looking to trap him. I am looking to serve him.  

 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

When you are in a situation or lifestyle that is not allowed by God' permissive will , then you have to accept that any real answer you get from a biblical standpoint is going to resist your hope.

OK?  Just keeping it real for you.

I am neither atheist or agnostic. I love god. I am offended by people who pridefully proclaim their religion to be truer than others. I am offended by people who, without first earnestly considering other religions, slothfully proclaim others to be wrong. I am offended by people who wrathfully believe that those who find god through other religions should be destined for hell.  I am offended by people who greedily presume god's love to be limited, so it can only be allocated to others who share their religion. Yes, many christians fit this bill.  I am profoundly grateful and humbled by those of you who do not.  You are the ones that are increasing my desire to know Jesus. 

7 hours ago, Behold said:

 

I want to pray for you, and the real believers here will agree with my prayer because we understand that when any 2 agree regarding a situation we are asking God to resolve, He will hear us and He will do it.....

-

Father,

Thank you for the Lovely Jesus,  who is  The Beautiful Savior and The living Light,... who ALONE is OUR only hope for today and THE only hope for tomorrow.  Father we thank you for the Cross and the Blood of Jesus that has forgiven our sin and thru this redemption has allowed us to be a part of your eternal family.    

Father you know this person who im talking to, and you know the one she loves.   Father you see this situation that is causing such distress, and so we ask now in Jesus's name that you reach into Her Heart with your love and into their Lives with your Grace and resolve this problem they are suffering by giving  them GRACE and Deliverance and a Final solution .

In Jesus Name I pray,

amen.

 

Thank you <3 

 

[Behold]

1 hour ago, FeministWhoLovesABeliever said:

 

 

God does not allow an unbeliever and a believer to be married? Is there a verse that says this? 

Though I don't think it will change your assessment, I do want to clarify that he was Christian when we met and that we built a life together that we both said was permanent. But I think your point is that there wasn't a wedding ceremony. Is that what you are saying causes a woman to become a wife?  And if so, what does Christ want for a woman who, not knowing that a wedding ceremony was required to sanctify her partnership, gave 10 years and sacrificed more than most do for the man she considered to be her husband? 

I am not suggesting that staying with her isn't a sin, only that leaving her is also one. 

I think that, like the Canaanite woman, whose daughter was possessed by a demon, who dared to speak up for herself, after the disciples asked Jesus to cast her away and Jesus himself told her that he wasn't there for her and equated her to being a dog, that Jesus would also say to me "O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire."

Wrong word. Sorry. But we were both previously married and entered into sexual relationships before our divorces were finalized (but long after they were underway and beyond reversal), so we are adulterers as well.  I have no doubt that our "marriage" is infinitely more sacred than our legal marriages were. I was not one flesh with my husband. He was not one flesh with his wife. 

I don't find the biblical god's will "permissive" but I appreciate you keeping it real. 

I had somehow thought that there might be a general consensus. But there doesn't seem to be. You say that we are not married others say that we are. Although frustrating, knowing there is so much room for interpretation makes Christianity a little more accessible to me. So, thank you for that.  

I think God also makes unattainable standards of morality and ethical boundaries so that none of us can claim to be free from sin. 

We are celibate and living apart, while we figure this out. 

I do not want him to stay with me out of obligation. If he takes the opposite view that you do, and believes it to be his responsibility to recognise our marriage, but does not want to be married, than I will divorce him, so that he can be free. I am not looking to trap him. I am looking to serve him.  

I am neither atheist or agnostic. I love god. I am offended by people who pridefully proclaim their religion to be truer than others. I am offended by people who, without first earnestly considering other religions, slothfully proclaim others to be wrong. I am offended by people who wrathfully believe that those who find god through other religions should be destined for hell.  I am offended by people who greedily presume god's love to be limited, so it can only be allocated to others who share their religion. Yes, many christians fit this bill.  I am profoundly grateful and humbled by those of you who do not.  You are the ones that are increasing my desire to know Jesus. 

Thank you <3 

 

I can speak for Jesus when He said this...."I am THE WAY".   I am THE Savior .  "if you do not believe that i am the only savior, then you will die in your sin". (Sin unforgiven)     And i can attest to the Truth that no other religion that you are considering offers a resurrected Savior who died for your sin.  The Buddha's bones are available to inspect, as are Gandhi's also...   However,  Christ's bones are not on this earth since He rose from Dead after He first bled and died on The Cross for your sin.  There is no religious leader you can discover, past, present, or future, who literally died for your sin so that you can be a part of God's family.. There is only one.   Jesus.  He is the only one who did that for you, because He loves you so much.

  I can truthfully say that no other religion offers a way for your sin to be forgiven, so that God can have you as His own.  And as what we are considering that you've done is partly sin......fornication has been committed.  So,  if you were otherwise sin free all your life , you have committed that one.  And no other religion that you are affiliated with or will ever consider, can offer the Blood of a Risen Savior to forgive you of your one sin.  And if you die unforgiven, then you kept your own self out of God's family.   Listen, If Jesus is a myth, then Heaven is also.. But because He rose from the dead, you can believe there is no sin found in heaven.  So, a person's sin, has to be dealt with, before they die.    If you believe that sin is a myth, and there is no such thing as absolute Truth,  then all i can tell you is that God has another point of view.   John 14:6

 

The New Testament defines one flesh as the sexual union between a man and a woman.  This can even be between a man and a hooker.  As its the same sex outside of Marriage, that defines fornication .

 

The New Testament teaches that a Saved person is not to be "unequally yoked" with an unbeliever.  This means marriage.  There is no leeway.  2nd Corinthians 6:14

 

And i understand that you have committed to each other, and have been together for a long time.  However, you are not his wife.  You are his love life and his sex partner and his best friend.

 

If you find that the situation you are in seems too harsh, then plz consider that when you entered into it, the way you did, is what  caused the effect you are now dealing  with..

 

Its an unfortunate reality that the one you love allowed you to become a part of what you didn't understand, 10 yrs ago,  that has now become what he should have been faithful to from the beginning that would have spared you from what you are having to deal with now..

His lack of faithfulness to his Faith and to His God and To his Savior,, put you in this situation...Im sorry that this happened to you.  See, you are just an unbeliever, thinking that all religion is the same, and He knew the Truth.  You were just living the typical sinful life that follows all unbelievers, but HE knew better...and now you are in pain.

Its not a sin if you part from this person.  The sin is the unmarried sex, not the love that you feel.

 

He can't recognize a common law marriage.  AS God doesn't. So, that is how it has to be.   The "STATE"  understands that a lot of  men will take long term advantage of a woman's love and body, and never make the ultimate commitment, so, they improvised and created that " common law".  However this law does not bind God's truth, reflect it, or change it.

 

Im glad that you both are staying celibate.  This has to be so.  

 

God answers prayers.

Believe it.

 

B

 

 

 

Edited April 21, 2020 by Behold

[Coliseum]

2 hours ago, FeministWhoLovesABeliever said:

 

 

God does not allow an unbeliever and a believer to be married? Is there a verse that says this? 

Though I don't think it will change your assessment, I do want to clarify that he was Christian when we met and that we built a life together that we both said was permanent. But I think your point is that there wasn't a wedding ceremony. Is that what you are saying causes a woman to become a wife?  And if so, what does Christ want for a woman who, not knowing that a wedding ceremony was required to sanctify her partnership, gave 10 years and sacrificed more than most do for the man she considered to be her husband? 

I am not suggesting that staying with her isn't a sin, only that leaving her is also one. 

I think that, like the Canaanite woman, whose daughter was possessed by a demon, who dared to speak up for herself, after the disciples asked Jesus to cast her away and Jesus himself told her that he wasn't there for her and equated her to being a dog, that Jesus would also say to me "O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire."

 

Wrong word. Sorry. But we were both previously married and entered into sexual relationships before our divorces were finalized (but long after they were underway and beyond reversal), so we are adulterers as well.  I have no doubt that our "marriage" is infinitely more sacred than our legal marriages were. I was not one flesh with my husband. He was not one flesh with his wife. 

 

I don't find the biblical god's will "permissive" but I appreciate you keeping it real. 

I had somehow thought that there might be a general consensus. But there doesn't seem to be. You say that we are not married others say that we are. Although frustrating, knowing there is so much room for interpretation makes Christianity a little more accessible to me. So, thank you for that.  

 

I think God also makes unattainable standards of morality and ethical boundaries so that none of us can claim to be free from sin. 

 

 

We are celibate and living apart, while we figure this out. 

 

I do not want him to stay with me out of obligation. If he takes the opposite view that you do, and believes it to be his responsibility to recognise our marriage, but does not want to be married, than I will divorce him, so that he can be free. I am not looking to trap him. I am looking to serve him.  

 

 

I am neither atheist or agnostic. I love god. I am offended by people who pridefully proclaim their religion to be truer than others. I am offended by people who, without first earnestly considering other religions, slothfully proclaim others to be wrong. I am offended by people who wrathfully believe that those who find god through other religions should be destined for hell.  I am offended by people who greedily presume god's love to be limited, so it can only be allocated to others who share their religion. Yes, many christians fit this bill.  I am profoundly grateful and humbled by those of you who do not.  You are the ones that are increasing my desire to know Jesus. 

Thank you <3 

 

FeministWhoLovesABeliever,

I hope you are having a beautiful day today. The sun is shining here. 

I am not joining your other conversation, but just encouraging you to seek Him. We have a tendency to forget where we came from. In our natural state, we are very rebellious towards the God of the Bible. Jesus said he was hated without a cause. People today are 'shouting just as loudly' as they did 2000 years ago: "Crucify Him." And while he hung on the cross so disfigured by our brutality that he became unrecognizable, he called out to the Father, "Forgive them, for they know not what they do." 

When we consider the greatest of all earthly kings, King David, who committed adultery and then murder to cover it up, God said of him, "You are the apple of my eye," and "a man after my own heart." Moses killed a man for beating a Hebrew, yet God called him friend, as one who talks to another face-to-face. Jacob was a liar, a thief, and a cheat, yet God renamed him Israel, after the nation. Were their consequences severe here on earth? Yes. They paid to the very last cent, yet God saved them. I think you are starting to see that God does not judge us by our behavior. He already knows what is in a man's heart, and knew us from before the foundations of the earth. There are some men on Death Row going to heaven. Why then, were these men, and countless others saved when God calls us on our very best day, "filthy rags"? Because we believe that He is everything He claims to be. The only reason a man remains unsaved God says is because of unbelief. Hebrews talks about those who harden their heart against Him. He says, Today is the day" [for salvation]. We cannot wait a moment too late, for in the next moment God may call us home, and it is why He says, "Anyone who is among the living has hope --even a live dog is better off than a dead lion!" 

It is by believing---even though we may not understand or grasp what we have believed. A man who comes to Christ is as a baby in his mother's arms. He does not yet understand until he experiences life. It is the same with our spiritual journey. When I was first saved, I did not have a shadow of a clue what it meant---but by faith---apart from my feelings, I chose to believe that Jesus was everything he claimed to be. Little by little, as his Spirit divided for me the truth and what was really right from wrong, I began to grow. Every believer is at a different place in his walk with Jesus, but it is not how small or how large our faith, but the Object of out faith, Jesus Christ, who saves us. 

Wishing you the very best.

 

 

Edited April 21, 2020 by Coliseum

[FeministWhoLovesABeliever]

On 4/20/2020 at 3:16 PM, DustyRoad said:

--- I spent the last six years living alongside a woman who identified as a radical feminist and who also fancied herself an atheist --- but my experience with this dear soul who passed on from this world isn't shared so easily. My time with her was the work of Jesus Christ as impossible as that may seem to your sensibilities... some of that substance is committed to writing in my testimony which I finished posting earlier this morning. It's entitled "From The Dust Into Life" in the Testimonies forum which you now have access to as a member.

No matter what you decide my friend, I'm uplifted by the warm welcomes and godly advice offered here by my brothers and sisters in the Lord. I encourage you to learn more about the faith we share in common and ask questions elsewhere in the forums. I'm glad you're here!    

You write beautifully. Your story calls me closer to Jesus. Thank you for your warm welcome and your service <3 

[FeministWhoLovesABeliever]

On 4/20/2020 at 4:22 PM, HAZARD said:

Here is the truth straight from the scriptures.. Don't worry about what others think or say.

1 Cor. 7:  14, For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 

Bless you. Thank you. 

[Willa]

15 hours ago, FeministWhoLovesABeliever said:

God does not allow an unbeliever and a believer to be married? Is there a verse that says this? 

2Co 6:14  Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers [do not make mismated alliances with them or come under a different yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership have right living and right standing with God with iniquity and lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness?  2Co 6:15  What harmony can there be between Christ and Belial [the devil]? Or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?  2Co 6:16  What agreement [can there be between] a temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God; even as God said, I will dwell in and with and among them and will walk in and with and among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be My people. [Exo 25:8; Exo 29:45; Lev 26:12; Jer 31:1; Eze 37:27]  2Co 6:17  So, come out from among [unbelievers], and separate (sever) yourselves from them, says the Lord, and touch not [any] unclean thing; then I will receive you kindly and treat you with favor, [Isa 52:11]  2Co 6:18  And I will be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty. [Isa 43:6; Hos 1:10]

Forgive me for sounding so harsh.  I disobeyed that verse for 9 years and fell away from God.  No-one is more miserable than a back slidden Christian.  When I came back to Him and wholly sought God with all my heart, I prayed day and night for him.  Those years were absolutely miserable and heartbreaking for both of us.  He had clients who would tell him about Jesus while he was out of town.  He couldn't see how God was calling him till after he chose to follow God too and looked back.  Then the change in him was dramatic.  He became the kindest and gentlest person.  That was 1974.  He died in 2017.  In the last years I realized that what I loved most about him was that he had become like Father God, and it was much the way you describe your partner.  You see, God changes us over time as we read the Bible, to become more like Jesus and Father God.  So what I loved most about him was that God's Spirit lived in him.  Sure he still made mistakes.  But I never stopped loving him.  It was just heart breaking to see him in misery until he asked God to forgive him again and to ask God to help him. God chastens those he loves.  The reason I have done well since his death is that many people are praying for me.   I also never lost him completely because I still have God's Spirit living with me, comforting me and helping me find stuff I misplace, which hubby also did..

The order of men over women is not putting women down.  God looks at us as equal.  It is just social order.  We are to conform to our husband.  Together we become a whole person; sometime they call us their better half or their other half.  We fill in where they lack.  They are to have the last word, but that doesn't mean we can't respectfully offer ours.  But this is in marriage.

The Jews gave a lot of protective laws to women as well as to slaves.  Christians gave even more  They don't look like that to us because our society is much different than a middle eastern society 2100 years ago. Thankfully we don't have Shirea law.

I have had many close friends who have claimed to have common law marriages; it may be true in some cases if they live in a common law state.  Few are.  They had always lived in states where that was illegal.  If you have truly lived in a common law state I would recognized that as a legal marriage in your case, even though it is not a religious ceremony.  However, in my heart I would never feel married by common law.  Mine was very small with about 40 people, close friends and relatives.  It was in a church with a short sermon.  I made my husband listen to a copy of it on our 50th wedding anniversary because I am sure he didn't hear it the first time.  It was a hot summer evening and all he could think of was the sweat trickling down his legs!

I hear a lot of men claiming they are married just because they had sex and it makes me angry when they say that and claim to be Christians even though they have never lived in a common law state..  To me they are either trying to justify what they have done or they are lying to us and to themselves as well.  Uh hum.  I have always spoken up even when it is not popular, and what you see is who I am.  Hubby was the diplomatic one, but I have tried to let his kindness rub off on me. God isn't through rubbing off my rough edges.  

 Being a Christian is like being in a rock polishing tumbler.  It is a wild ride with some bumps and bruises.  It is adventurous and sometimes hurts.  But you come out looking really beautiful and reflecting Christ's love. It is like no other religion because it is about God coming to us and seeking us out.  It is about Him providing us with forgiveness when we have never deserved it and never will. That is what grace means.

Again, please forgive me if I have sounded harsh or judgmental.  What I was saying is counter cultural.  Sin is considered normal in our society.  It is offensive to God.  Pride is also sin, but our culture praises it.  God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.  Our society considers humility to be weakness but God treasures it.

 I am praying for you.  Please pray for me as well.

[kwikphilly]

Blessings Friend....

   I've addressed a couple of things in more depth on the previous page which was after our initial conversation,you didn't reply& that is okay but I'm writing now because I've read a couple of your posts to others& I'm getting  a better idea of where you stand or rather ,a better picture of the whole scenario...its pretty hard to answer properly when you really don't know some pretty important contributing factors...or when you don't know a person from Adams house cat! lol

   Anyway,I'd like to encourage you to re-read what Brother Behold has said (& perhaps what I've told you regarding this "marriage" ....most of us are saying the same thing & yet you don't seem to see that,that troubles me because you find it encouraging that there is NOT a common consensus...it seems to rub you the wrong way if a Believer tells you something a certain way & you are offended by many things......You see,we are ALL telling you there is ONLY ONE WAY to  our Heavenly Father but you say you are offended when a "Christian" says there is only one right way or theirs is the only Truth etc,,,etc,,,,I'm not sure(although I'm getting the picture) of what exactly you are more receptive to because you are easily turned off by this & that.....as I have said,I don't sugar coat but I only hope that you can see there is a common consensus here & that the Word of God is NOT open for interpretation-if that offends you then I am truly sorry but that is what God Says in His Written Word & not me

   I can tell you this,right now you are THEE most important person in the entire world to me because you are THE ONE my Lord & Savior Jesus brought here to us.....He Loves you & so do we ,all of us     I'm still  really on the fence about your mate,I only wish he was here talking with us as well.....I'm really glad you are apart & celibate right now & I can only hope & pray that your heart be open to RECEIVE and get the Guidance & Direction you need,it is not an easy thing and I can only imagine the hurt you are going through,I do believe you love this guy & it kinda make me feel angry that he put you in this situation.he must be mad at himself too.....I think my suspicions were right in that he was RELIGIOUS &now that he is coming into a more intimate Relationship with God in Christ he has found himself(& you) in a pickle

   I'm here to support you ,uplift you,encourage you,pray for you & give you HOPE.....I think,I know,you are being Called by Jesus& this may all have a wonderful ending(beginning really)......Please re-read Beholds replies & mine in regards to Biblical Marriage.....remember,it is a Covenant between man,woman & God,,a Sanctified Union of 2 Believers .....or not a Marriage(in Gods Eyes) yes,one flesh but that does not constitute COVENANT   If it is Gods Will you be joined and in Covenant then keep apart & in Gods Perfect Time you will be together again,no rush ..in Christ it does not take  2 halfs to make a whole.....you do not complete each other,He Does.....in Christ 2 WHOLES make ONE really great Marriage

    Please pray,we are all praying with you.....maybe all this has happened to bring you to the foot of the cross

                                                                 With love-in Christ<Kwik