Ruined my life

[Hmh123]

I need help as to what to do with my life. 

I’m 24 and haven’t done anything with my life. I went to college for fashion and dropped out. Now I live with my mother. I think of joining the Air Force or navy. I owe student loans and have to wait 6 months to go back to college. I was adopted from my mom. I don’t even like living with her. I was taken from her for a reason, because she’s crazy. She pays no attention to me. We don’t even talk. The people I know are just people from church I’ve just recently met and even then those people don’t really want to be my friend because I carry to much baggage. I waited really late to repent. Even though I’m clearly alive right now, I feel like I killed myself inside spiritually a long time ago. I wish I could just kill myself and be put into a new body. I screw my whole life up. By the time I graduate college, I’ll be 28 or 29. Most kids graduate way earlier than that. I just have to deal with so many things I’ve done in my life and I don’t realize things are a mistake till after I do them. It’s hard growing up with no family or people who care about you. I just jumped at things and never did my research.

[Aimes]

Oh honey, we have literally all felt like that. I'm 30 and still haven't completed my education. There are so many things I think I should have done and didn't but the Lord has given me peace about them lately. Our stories don't have to match up to the lives of others. We are all here for a different purpose. We can find peace knowing that His plans/will for our lives is not, nor can it be, thwarted by our own hands or by anyone else. He has good things for you and His plan is perfect for you no matter how it may seem at this particular moment. 

I saw a quote not long ago that kind of summed up, it simply said "If you think you've blown God's plan for your life, rest in this; You, my beautiful friend, you are not that powerful". 

I will keep you in prayer and I hope you know that it's never too late and you have never gone too far for the Father to make it all okay again. He loves you in such an amazing way.  <3

 

[secretopossumcabal]

2 hours ago, Hmh123 said:

I need help as to what to do with my life. 

I’m 24 and haven’t done anything with my life. I went to college for fashion and dropped out. Now I live with my mother. I think of joining the Air Force or navy. I owe student loans and have to wait 6 months to go back to college. I was adopted from my mom. I don’t even like living with her. I was taken from her for a reason, because she’s crazy. She pays no attention to me. We don’t even talk. The people I know are just people from church I’ve just recently met and even then those people don’t really want to be my friend because I carry to much baggage. I waited really late to repent. Even though I’m clearly alive right now, I feel like I killed myself inside spiritually a long time ago. I wish I could just kill myself and be put into a new body. I screw my whole life up. By the time I graduate college, I’ll be 28 or 29. Most kids graduate way earlier than that. I just have to deal with so many things I’ve done in my life and I don’t realize things are a mistake till after I do them. It’s hard growing up with no family or people who care about you. I just jumped at things and never did my research.

Have you considered just finding the right guy and becoming a stay at home mom?

Really, I don't like how society thinks that all women should become career women, stay-at-home mom's are infinitely more valuable to a civilization than career women, as the family is the foundation to a civilization. Not many women get the epiphany "I just want to be a mother" in their 20's, but those that do are very lucky imo. 

Just some consideration... I know life is full of anxiety when you don't know which way to go on the fork and have a bit of a burden on your back. Just take each day at a time, tomorrow will take care of itself. Don't look too far into the future.

Take it easy, one day at a time. Life is not a race, some people find out who they are early, others they find out late in their life...You are the only one capable of achieving what God meant for you -- nobody else is capable of doing what he wants for you, but you yourself, that is why he saw it fit to give you the life he gave you and not to someone else... besides, our trophies in this world ultimately don't matter, none of us will be "winning" our way into heaven.

 

[Willa]

Have you been baptized?  When you repent and turn to Christ for forgiveness, He does give you a new life.  His Holy Spirit is born in you and He starts changing you to look more like Jesus.  The old you with all the mistakes is now dead and buried.  That is what baptism represents, and being immersed helps to make that more real to you.  

Read your Bible every day and pray.  Tell God how your feel.  The enemy wants you to believe the worst.  Don't let him lie to you!  He came to lie, to steal and to destroy.  Don't let him steal the joy of your salvation.  Underline every verse that you find that gives you hope, peace joy and love. 

Php 4:4  AMP  Rejoice in the Lord always [delight, gladden yourselves in Him]; again I say, Rejoice! [Psa 37:4]

Php 4:5  Let all men know and perceive and recognize your unselfishness (your considerateness, your forbearing spirit). The Lord is near [He is coming soon].

Php 4:6  Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God.

Php 4:7  And God's peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Php 4:8  For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].

[missmuffet]

2 hours ago, Hmh123 said:

I need help as to what to do with my life. 

I’m 24 and haven’t done anything with my life. I went to college for fashion and dropped out. Now I live with my mother. I think of joining the Air Force or navy. I owe student loans and have to wait 6 months to go back to college. I was adopted from my mom. I don’t even like living with her. I was taken from her for a reason, because she’s crazy. She pays no attention to me. We don’t even talk. The people I know are just people from church I’ve just recently met and even then those people don’t really want to be my friend because I carry to much baggage. I waited really late to repent. Even though I’m clearly alive right now, I feel like I killed myself inside spiritually a long time ago. I wish I could just kill myself and be put into a new body. I screw my whole life up. By the time I graduate college, I’ll be 28 or 29. Most kids graduate way earlier than that. I just have to deal with so many things I’ve done in my life and I don’t realize things are a mistake till after I do them. It’s hard growing up with no family or people who care about you. I just jumped at things and never did my research.

Have you even thought of getting some Christian counseling? It sounds like you are carrying a lot of unhappiness and grief in your life. It would be good to talk to someone and start to heal. It would be good to start a life of your own and get out from living with your mother. Maybe she is a toxic person and it is not healthy to live with her. It does not matter how long it takes you to get through college. I do not know if you are a Christian but if you are a praying person perhaps you could give all of this to God. Let Him take all of this burden off of your shoulders. Let Him guide and direct you through your life. You will not be sorry.

[other one]

HMH please give a lot of thought to what Willa has posted here...    first you need to settle things with the Lord and then you can set things in your life strait.     Give your whole self over to him and tell him and everyone you have done that.....   it is important that you get baptized....   doesn't actually save you, but it is usually the first step in following his instructions on how to live.....    ask him if you haven't to forgive you of the way you've messed up your life and he will do so.   He promised not only to forgive you but to basically forget about it all.

That will give you the new start you need....

I gotta tell you that I couldn't count the people I know that really started their lives at about your age and dumped a lot of stupid things they had done in the process....    My wife didn't finish school till she was over 30 and taught for over 20 years after that and was a very successful teacher.

I'm over 70 now and I was in my mid 30's when I really turned it over to the Lord and he's made things happen that turned out OK for us....

So don't despair.....   don't think it's too late to get a good start.....   you already know most of the things not to do now.  I can't help but chuckle a bit when you say you are 24 and think you have messed up your whole life.....     for me that was about 40 years ago when the Lord tapped me on the shoulder and asked me what in the world I was doing...   and it sounds like you are coming to that point I was at long ago.

You may not be able to get a new body, but you can surely renew your spirit and feel fresh again.....    and maybe even help fix your crazy old mom.

Don't give up, you are just starting if you choose to do so.

[missmuffet]

Hmh it sounds like you are just down on yourself. God loves you. Pick yourself back up and dust your self off and pray to God and ask Him what He wants in your life.

[BK1110]

If the people at your church don't want to be around you because of your baggage, I'd question their commitment to their faith. That is certainly not the attitude of a true Christian.

I'm 31 and have been disabled, jobless, and educationless for 12 and a half years now. And there's no end in sight and my parents, who continue to be my caregivers, aren't getting any younger. Trust me, your life is far from over or wrecked. Cry out to God and ask Him to lead you, wherever He wants. Spend time daily in the word, reading and growing and learning. God has a plan for you; you need to learn to desire that instead of worrying about when college will end etc. Let Him lead you.

[ForHisGlory37]

16 hours ago, Hmh123 said:

I need help as to what to do with my life. 

I’m 24 and haven’t done anything with my life. I went to college for fashion and dropped out. Now I live with my mother. I think of joining the Air Force or navy. I owe student loans and have to wait 6 months to go back to college. I was adopted from my mom. I don’t even like living with her. I was taken from her for a reason, because she’s crazy. She pays no attention to me. We don’t even talk. The people I know are just people from church I’ve just recently met and even then those people don’t really want to be my friend because I carry to much baggage. I waited really late to repent. Even though I’m clearly alive right now, I feel like I killed myself inside spiritually a long time ago. I wish I could just kill myself and be put into a new body. I screw my whole life up. By the time I graduate college, I’ll be 28 or 29. Most kids graduate way earlier than that. I just have to deal with so many things I’ve done in my life and I don’t realize things are a mistake till after I do them. It’s hard growing up with no family or people who care about you. I just jumped at things and never did my research.

Hi Hmh123, God has a plan for you, even with all your mistakes.  God can and will use all your circumstances.  Don't let the enemy discourage you or steal your joy.  Know that there are people here that care for you.  That is genuine love in Christ.  Here is a video that I thought would encourage you. 

You are beautiful, you are greatly loved!  Live for Him and call out the name of Jesus and He will hear and answer.  Rejoice in the Lord for He is good, all the time!

[Debp]

The following verse is so helpful to all of us....I hope you will take it to your heart and mind:

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.  1 John 1:9

Remember, God loves you because you are His child through Jesus Christ as your personal Savior.  No matter what, He still loves you.  And if people fail you, remember the Lord will never fail you.  And, look up, you are still young!   Your whole life is before you!