NO you DON'T understand!

[bryan]

1 hour ago, missmuffet said:

Just being with someone even if you do not say anything can be a powerful comfort.

Being with someone and NOT saying anything can be very powerful.

[frienduff thaylorde]

16 minutes ago, Yowm said:

Enen if you have gone through the same tragedy as another you still don't know what they are feeling as we are all constituted differently.

But as you already know Yowm .  GOD knows all things what is specifically needed to get said or done.    Tis why I simply say , the SPIRIT will give us words.

Be blessed yowm.    Ps.   Do me a favor , if I die before you all, and the pope made me a saint , PLEASE DONT LET PEOPLE PRAY TO ME.   I am just a man that the only

goodness I had was FROM GOD in CHRIST.  just keep reminding them pray to GOD.   amen.  

[Sower]

5 minutes ago, frienduff thaylorde said:

But as you already know Yowm .  GOD knows all things what is specifically needed to get said or done.    Tis why I simply say , the SPIRIT will give us words.

Be blessed yowm.    Ps.   Do me a favor , if I die before you all, and the pope made me a saint , PLEASE DONT LET PEOPLE PRAY TO ME.   I am just a man that the only

goodness I had was FROM GOD in CHRIST.  just keep reminding them pray to GOD.   amen.  

OK frienduff thaylorde, when you die,I won't pray to you. But I will look you up to see you in person/spirit............(I'll probably beat you there).

[frienduff thaylorde]

1 hour ago, Yowm said:

If the pope makes you a saint, I'd be concerned you'd get kicked out of heaven. LOL

Ya got me on that one.   If he did call me a saint I would have had to have sold out to the dung pile of interfaith mindset.

In his book , ones like us , are.   what were HIS WORDS............oh yeah preaching the gospel is LIKE JIHAD.   yeah a TERROIST .

[frienduff thaylorde]

1 hour ago, Gary Lee said:

OK frienduff thaylorde, when you die,I won't pray to you. But I will look you up to see you in person/spirit............(I'll probably beat you there).

The way this world is headed and the signs of the times,  I don't see myself as gray headed when I die or Christ returns

Which ever comes first .    The signs are so clear as to what days these be.    Gary you are not that old.

Wait till you are myage the ripe age of forty five .    not that this is old.  

[frienduff thaylorde]

2 minutes ago, Yowm said:

Is that why we never hear him preaching the Gospel except the gospel of ecology?

Yowm.     did you notice that on where you quoated me it has the number six,  yet in the original their is no six.

What on earth is that.   GO back up and read what you I originally said.  then look in what you copied it has the number six.

Probably something simple I just have no idea what it is.     I looked up above on the other post to make sure it did not have a five. 

cause I thought maybe it just does that. THOUGH I have never noticed it before .    What is it , do you know.

OH, but to answer your question .   yeah the only gospel you will hear from him, or most in line with him of every faith is one form or another of all inclusive interfaith .

its speading like a cancer fast now.

[angels4u]

3 hours ago, Yowm said:

If the pope makes you a saint, I'd be concerned you'd get kicked out of heaven. LOL

Hi Town, In Jesus we,re all Saints who will reign with Jesus someday!

[appy]

A divorce is painful to the one who does not want it, because it is separation from someone loved and cared about. When a divorce is final all hope of being reconciled is lost. A spouse is a cherished friend and it is a major loss to lose a friend you care about just the same as if a close friend had died. The emotional pain is great. All loss hurts of course and most people have experienced a loss at some point in their lives and maybe they have not experienced a divorce; but have experienced the loss of a loved one, a friend, a neighbor, or a pet.

Any loss of someone you care about hurts emotionally, and this is what people can relate to. Is the emotional roller coaster one feels. One moment your crying because the person is gone and can't come back and you so dearly miss that person and the next moment you feel angry because you also feel abandoned and alone. As Jade has said we can feel compassion when someone is hurting emotionally for we all have experienced emotional pain. Maybe the words “I understand” isn't the best way to say “I am here for you and care about what is happening to you”. I agree it is kinda clumsy, to say “I understand” but know that through it all, the person speaking to you is trying to show you and let you know that they care about you and what is going on in your world.

[Neighbor]

18 hours ago, Steve_K said:

A person gets divorced, a friend that has never been married says "I understand"

A grieving mourner at the funeral home has someone tell them "I understand"

A person with health problems hears from a healthy person "I understand"

Even Christians say this at times. No, we don't understand at all. 

Pray with the person, talk to them, encourage them with scripture, but don't claim to understand how or what they feel. when you don't.

From personal experience I can tell you it gets frustrating and even insulting.

Hi Steve,

May I be indulged for a few paragraphs?

From my own perspective I find that :

There is sympathy, and there is empathy.  Both are legitimate and compassionate responses to another's pain.

 I suggest laments and problems are not especially unique. They are quite common, and  known personally to many if not most humans of any mature age. Thus, "I understand" is quite a valid recognition of a common experience.

There is a protocol that insists on accepting sympathy  and also  empathy, if one is going to share of their own complaints and laments. The exchange is a process toward working on overcoming them; but if one thinks them self to be a Lone Martyr so to speak, then the hearer of the complaints only serves to grow the pride of the martyr in their errant thought that they are the only sufferer out there, the one sufferer all alone in the world.  That thinking defeats the process of sympathy and empathy that is to serve the good purpose of strengthening one another in dealing with  common problems and feelings of hurt.

All problems are pretty common! If a person resents both sympathy  and empathy as not being sufficient recognition of  a hurt and  complaint, is any recognition of them sufficient in the eyes of the sufferer of them?  If not, then the person  offering either sympathy or empathy is wasting their time with such a person are they not?

Individuals do sympathize and also even  do have empathy, one for another. But each  also tires of a person's constant unreconcilable complaints even as God does, for the goal is to get toughened up, to grow and get past a hurt to be more fully sanctified and improved in our responses and reaction to adversity, not dwell within it  eternally. 

 Why even God tires of a man's  complaints, and urges him ( all of us ) to toughen up so that we may face the really harder stuff to come:  No one will find "suck it up buttercup" in the Bible, but perhaps it is good and Biblically based advice in it's precept.

“If you have raced with men on foot, and they have wearied you,
    how will you compete with horses?
And if in a safe land you are so trusting,
    what will you do in the thicket of the Jordan?         -From God's answer to Jeremiah's complaint

 

Be of good cheer, have a happy countenance, count it all for gain. Run the race and finish well. I do sympathize  with you  and I do understand, even to having common experience empathy regarding  some issues.

Take care and God bless you,

Neighbor

 

 

 

Edited September 18, 2017 by Neighbor

[Aimes]

I can sort of understand where you're coming from but I think we need to realize that the majority of folks who reply like this are genuinely just trying to let you know they care. I lost my mom (my only family) when I was 18 years old. I was still in high school and all of my close friends were of the same age. Almost all of them still had happy healthy mothers and fathers but when my mom passed away a large majority said things similar to "I understand" or "I know that has to hurt so bad". They didn't understand my exact pain, I'm of the persuasion that none of us really understand something unless you've walked the same road, but they could understand that it had to be very painful. It meant a lot to me to know they cared enough for me to even attempt to understand how painful it was, they cared enough to try to console me in whatever way they could and though their words couldn't take the grief away from my heart they did let me know that I had people who loved me. I really just think sometimes we have to see the intentions of their heart if that makes any sense.