What does each Person Do?

[Reinitin]

12 hours ago, Waiting2BwithHim said:

These are both hypothetical situations and never happened..

This is more of a getting hopefully both men and women views of this..

Linda is married to Ken and ken's best friends name is Tony.

Ken tells Linda that he has a business meeting out of town that will be for the weekend. By the time Ken gets back he catches Linda in an affair with Tony?

What should he do?

 

Now vice versa where Linda goes out on business and when she gets home she catches him in an affair with her best friend Jennifer?

What should she do? 

 

 

If Ken and Linda are christian.. You file for divorce:). Don't be unequally yoked to unbelievers. 

[Neighbor]

"For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy."

This is why I suspect that " other one " on this thread asked about kids.  I asked about various other, " what if's " to indicate we could go on perhaps for a long time with  hypotheticals to no great resolve at the end  of the exercise. God has pretty much got it all covered already.

Matthew 19 English Standard Version (ESV)

Teaching About Divorce

19 Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.

 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,  and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?  So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”  They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?”  He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

 The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given.  For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.”

 

Seems no one is commanded to divorce. Plus there is much reason not to once marriage has been decided upon as a course for life.

[dr3032]

My two cents? I'd dump her, and i'd say the same for anyone, male or female.

A relationship doesn't just happen. They waited until their spouse was away and then they did it. It shows a specific chain of two eyes desiring one another for a time before the departure. Maybe they were having an affair before, or maybe they just checked each other out and flirted a little while the spouse wasn't looking. Even among the morally loose, a woman might wait until the first date is over before she decides to do anything, and even a prostitute waits to be paid and for details to be discussed. It isn't at all like, woops, how did that happen, uh oh. I came into the kitchen looking for some sauce, I have no idea how I ended up on top of Stacy. Life is not an adult film. That, and cheaters are very manipulative, so I wouldn't trust my spouse no matter how she begged or what she said.

Kids apply here, too. Kids do perhaps need a mother and a father, but what they need more is a peaceful childhood. What kind of upbringing is it, wondering where mother is, what it is that's got father so paranoid and upset? My own parents got divorced because of their affairs, and i'd say that was all the better. I don't remember much because I was young, but all I remember of my parents marriage was rage, yelling and rage. Divorce does not nullify the parenting role. I mean, I know of a guy who left a woman when he found out she was cheating and his daughter was not his actual daughter - But he still visits his daughter and loves her dearly, even if she is not his daughter by blood.

On that note, I would include that anger is not necessary. Things do indeed happen and mistakes are indeed made. Yelling or getting violent are never necessary. That, and remaining calm and collected (or at least as calm and collected as one can be), will help things run along more smoothly. Less chance of legal arguements over ownership of property, less chance of dispute over child custody (super not good for kids), it's just better all around if there's an effort to minimize fuss.

[missmuffet]

If they are not believers they are going to do whatever they want to do. Just like any unbeliever in this world. If they are born again true believers why are they having an affair?

[Blood Bought 1953]

4 hours ago, missmuffet said:

If they are not believers they are going to do whatever they want to do. Just like any unbeliever in this world. If they are born again true believers why are they having an affair?

 

“ The flesh is weak” would be my guess.

[johnthebaptist]

23 hours ago, Waiting2BwithHim said:

These are both hypothetical situations and never happened..

This is more of a getting hopefully both men and women views of this..

Linda is married to Ken and ken's best friends name is Tony.

Ken tells Linda that he has a business meeting out of town that will be for the weekend. By the time Ken gets back he catches Linda in an affair with Tony?

What should he do?

 

Now vice versa where Linda goes out on business and when she gets home she catches him in an affair with her best friend Jennifer?

What should she do? 

 

 

In both cases I would suggest a different choice of best friends. Then it's up to the injured parties whether or not to divorce.

[Reinitin]

10 hours ago, Neighbor said:

"For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy."

This is why I suspect that " other one " on this thread asked about kids.  I asked about various other, " what if's " to indicate we could go on perhaps for a long time with  hypotheticals to no great resolve at the end  of the exercise. God has pretty much got it all covered already.

Matthew 19 English Standard Version (ESV)

Teaching About Divorce

19 Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.

 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,  and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?  So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”  They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?”  He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

 The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given.  For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.”

 

Seems no one is commanded to divorce. Plus there is much reason not to once marriage has been decided upon as a course for life.

Yeah but a spouse that would cheat with a best friend is creating an emotional hell. Jesus said God hates divorce but he gave divorce so people could have peace from the soul wound adultery causes. Their isn't much peace in laying beside a person the rest of your life that betrayed you with your best friend. Jesus didn't keep or hold on to Judas who betrayed him for 30 pieces of silver.

Probably a spouse that would betray their betrothed for less is worse then Judas. I would consider it pure evil and turn away from that path so the Lord will heal me. 

This post didn't say anything about the cheater repenting. But they can repent with divorce papers in hand can't they? And that scripture your using is saying an unbeliever not an adulterous spouse.

You can forgive a rapist and still testify against then in court. And you can forgive an x spouse for destroying their marriage when you sign the final divorce papers.

God does hate divorce and the sins of man that called on his just attribute to make divorce justice for adultery. He himself divorced Israel for their adultery. Bible says he gave them a decree of divorce.

Plus using the Word of God as an emotional bondage to people who are wounded by the heart piercing  betrayal  of adultery and using their empathy to make them a slave of narrssasistic behavior is completely injustice and not of God in the way it is being used, in my opinion.

My son, don’t forget my teaching,
but let your heart keep my commands;
² for they will bring you
many days, a full life,^[a] and well-being.
³ Never let loyalty and faithfulness leave you.
Tie them around your neck;
write them on the tablet of your heart.
⁴ Then you will find favor and high regard
in the sight of God and man.

⁵ Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not rely on your own understanding;
⁶ think about Him in all your ways,
and He will guide you on the right paths.^[b]
7 Don’t consider yourself to be wise;
fear the Lord and turn away from evil.
⁸ This will be healing for your body^[c]
and strengthening for your bones.

if you want to go into Hosea I'll shine this little light of mine there too

Edited July 9, 2019 by Reinitin

[BeauJangles]

2 minutes ago, Reinitin said:

And you can forgive an x spouse for destroying their marriage when you sign the final divorce papers. 

This is true... And preferably better to do so before having done that.  

[Reinitin]

1 hour ago, BeauJangles said:

This is true... And preferably better to do so before having done that.  

Amen, the sooner we forgive the sooner we are free of  sin. It is a hard one to forgive but what is impossible to us is possible with God. 

Edited July 9, 2019 by Reinitin

[frienduff thaylorde]

1 hour ago, Reinitin said:

Yeah but a spouse that would cheat with a best friend is creating an emotional hell. Jesus said God hates divorce but he gave divorce so people could have peace from the soul wound adultery causes. Their isn't much peace in laying beside a person the rest of your life that betrayed you with your best friend. Jesus didn't keep or hold on to Judas who betrayed him for 30 pieces of silver.

Probably a spouse that would betray their betrothed for less is worse then Judas. I would consider it pure evil and turn away from that path so the Lord will heal me. 

This post didn't say anything about the cheater repenting. But they can repent with divorce papers in hand can't they? And that scripture your using is saying an unbeliever not an adulterous spouse.

You can forgive a rapist and still testify against then in court. And you can forgive an x spouse for destroying their marriage when you sign the final divorce papers.

God does hate divorce and the sins of man that called on his just attribute to make divorce justice for adultery. He himself divorced Israel for their adultery. Bible says he gave them a decree of divorce.

Plus using the Word of God as an emotional bondage to people who are wounded by the heart piercing  betrayal  of adultery and using their empathy to make them a slave of narrssasistic behavior is completely injustice and not of God in the way it is being used, in my opinion.

My son, don’t forget my teaching,
but let your heart keep my commands;
² for they will bring you
many days, a full life,^[a] and well-being.
³ Never let loyalty and faithfulness leave you.
Tie them around your neck;
write them on the tablet of your heart.
⁴ Then you will find favor and high regard
in the sight of God and man.

⁵ Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not rely on your own understanding;
⁶ think about Him in all your ways,
and He will guide you on the right paths.^[b]
7 Don’t consider yourself to be wise;
fear the Lord and turn away from evil.
⁸ This will be healing for your body^[c]
and strengthening for your bones.

if you want to go into Hosea I'll shine this little light of mine there too

Don't you never let one badger you over this .    THIS is the sole reason JESUS said one can divorce and wont be a adulterer IF they did remarry . HE said , SAVE FOR FORNICATION .

We all know what FORNICATION MEANS .