Empathy is destroying me

[SerenSunflower]

On 12/22/2017 at 6:27 AM, worthlessness1979 said:

It hurts so much to think of what that boy went through. I keep to imagining that I am that little boy getting beaten like that. I also Imagine that I was that boy's parents. I don't think I could survive knowing that somebody cause so much pain to someone that I loved. It hurts so much and I didn't even know that kid. This happens to me all the time and I hate having so much empathy towards people. I cried for hours and hours when I think of the people suffering like this. Well, that's an over-exaggeration I don't cry for hours but I cry a lot. I can't get the images out of my head

 

The face of pain and the face of suffering. The boy crying out. That boy probably cried out to his mother and she was not there. Imagine being that mother and knowing or thinking that your son is crying out for you while he is suffering and you were not there. Well, in my case of course, imagine being a father who was not there for his son.

Praise God! You are like Jesus!

³² When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

³³ When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. ³⁴ “Where have you laid him?” he asked.

“Come and see, Lord,” they replied.

³⁵ Jesus wept.

³⁶ Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!” ~ John 11:32-36

 

 

[MorningGlory]

On 12/22/2017 at 7:27 AM, worthlessness1979 said:

As I was browsing the internet, I came across the story of a 13 year old boy who was severely beaten and tortured because he was accused of stealing a bike, which turned out to not be true. He was beaten by four men, while another man video taped it and placed it on social media. This was in Bangladesh. There was a video of him getting beaten and tortured. I did not watch the video and I won't watch the video. But I could see his face, and he was in so much pain.

 

This just breaks my heart. I know it is very girly for a grown man to say that this breaks my heart. But I don't care. It does. I cannot get the images out of my head.

 

It hurts so much to think of what that boy went through. I keep to imagining that I am that little boy getting beaten like that. I also Imagine that I was that boy's parents. I don't think I could survive knowing that somebody cause so much pain to someone that I loved. It hurts so much and I didn't even know that kid. This happens to me all the time and I hate having so much empathy towards people. I cried for hours and hours when I think of the people suffering like this. Well, that's an over-exaggeration I don't cry for hours but I cry a lot. I can't get the images out of my head

 

The face of pain and the face of suffering. The boy crying out. That boy probably cried out to his mother and she was not there. Imagine being that mother and knowing or thinking that your son is crying out for you while he is suffering and you were not there. Well, in my case of course, imagine being a father who was not there for his son.

 

I hate having so much empathy towards people, it is a curse

 

And sometimes it is very hard to talk to other Christians about these things, because then they go off on you and say well you are just as evil as they are. I know that scripture says that if we break one commandment we break them all. But that doesn't mean that I cannot be upset about this. That doesn't mean that I can't feel for that little kid. It doesn't mean that I can't pray for justice for that kid. And it also doesn't mean that I can't hurt for the family. It wasn't just that kid that suffered, it was his parents I'm sure.

 

But Justice was served. Those men got the death penalty. But I am still saddened and hurt by this.

 

How do I have less empathy towards people? How can I not let it destroy me?

Don't have less empathy, Worth, but as Justin said, stay away from the bad news and read the Good News, the Gospel.  The world is so full of ugly things that I often have a hard time dealing with them and I have to lay them at the foot of the Cross.  It is not 'girly' for a man to cry, brother.  It is human and it is the way God made us.  Those who can't cry or feel empathy are the ones with the problem. 

[Marilyn C]

`Jesus wept.` (John 11: 35)

[SisterActs2]

Hi Worth 1979

I am having trouble calling you by your name, because Jesus believes you were worth dying for.  So, Worth it is for me.

These days we have huge amounts of stories from all over the world coming to us.  We are shown horrific scenes from all over the place.

We must choose not to watch some things, like some of us have said.  What happens is those with a lot of empathy and compassion take it all to heart, only to be so burdened with it all that we carry the world around on our shoulders.  Even though I understand how you feel, we must be careful not to allow too much of what is going on to completely overtake us, or we crack under the strain of it all.  It is just too much for us to cope with, as human beings.  Jesus said His yoke is easy and His burden is light.  Please pray, then give it to Jesus.  He is the only One qualified to deal with it all.  My pastor says "pray, then leave it with Him.  Don't carry the care of it."  He knows from his own experience and talking with myself that we have to do that.  Of course I am not saying that you shouldn't care.  Of course we should all care.  But never in history have we all had so much to cry over.  We never used to hear all the details of all the things we watch and see and hear.  I have stopped watching a lot of the news and bad movies.  God bless you, Worth, for having a wonderful compassionate heart, brother.

[worthlessness1979]

Thank you everyone

 

And thank you for the advice.

[MorningGlory]

4 minutes ago, worthlessness1979 said:

Thank you everyone

 

And thank you for the advice.

[Debp]

I try to turn things like what you described over to the Lord.  Sometimes it's all we can do....when you are starting to feel so bad, say to the Lord, "Lord, I give this situation to you, please help this person or situation.".   Then try to remember it's all in the Lord's hands...

I also avoid watching some videos on YouTube.  I am an animal lover and they often put those sad videos up while I'm watching something else.  So I just don't watch them...

[Estrella]

On 12/22/2017 at 9:27 PM, worthlessness1979 said:

As I was browsing the internet, I came across the story of a 13 year old boy who was severely beaten and tortured because he was accused of stealing a bike, which turned out to not be true. He was beaten by four men, while another man video taped it and placed it on social media. This was in Bangladesh. There was a video of him getting beaten and tortured. I did not watch the video and I won't watch the video. But I could see his face, and he was in so much pain.

 

This just breaks my heart. I know it is very girly for a grown man to say that this breaks my heart. But I don't care. It does. I cannot get the images out of my head.

 

It hurts so much to think of what that boy went through. I keep to imagining that I am that little boy getting beaten like that. I also Imagine that I was that boy's parents. I don't think I could survive knowing that somebody cause so much pain to someone that I loved. It hurts so much and I didn't even know that kid. This happens to me all the time and I hate having so much empathy towards people. I cried for hours and hours when I think of the people suffering like this. Well, that's an over-exaggeration I don't cry for hours but I cry a lot. I can't get the images out of my head

 

The face of pain and the face of suffering. The boy crying out. That boy probably cried out to his mother and she was not there. Imagine being that mother and knowing or thinking that your son is crying out for you while he is suffering and you were not there. Well, in my case of course, imagine being a father who was not there for his son.

 

I hate having so much empathy towards people, it is a curse

 

And sometimes it is very hard to talk to other Christians about these things, because then they go off on you and say well you are just as evil as they are. I know that scripture says that if we break one commandment we break them all. But that doesn't mean that I cannot be upset about this. That doesn't mean that I can't feel for that little kid. It doesn't mean that I can't pray for justice for that kid. And it also doesn't mean that I can't hurt for the family. It wasn't just that kid that suffered, it was his parents I'm sure.

 

But Justice was served. Those men got the death penalty. But I am still saddened and hurt by this.

 

How do I have less empathy towards people? How can I not let it destroy me?

Hello Brother. All i am gonna say is this: I do walk in your shoes although i am a sister. Sympathy and empathy are something i grow up with since a child. I feel or see things most in my circle do not, so much so i was told to be "not so good or kind" and that i am too foolish to be too good or kind. This isn't something confined to human...animals include in my empathy list too...maybe insects as well.  Nonetheless, rest assured that NOTHING in whatever you described up there deemed you as being girly...but rather a human...not just any human but one with a heart of Christ. I love one comment here which simply said "Jesus wept". And we know why He wept. God bless you, brother.

[JesusIsLord92]

Empathy is a gift of God. I believe I had this gift for awhile until it overwhelmed me. I saw so much abuse and torture over my Facebook feed. I tend to let things overwhelm me. It really upset me at times. Don’t lose this gift but if you are sensitive avoid it. You can pray for those suffering without viewing graphic content. 

[Aba]

On 12/22/2017 at 8:27 AM, worthlessness1979 said:

As I was browsing the internet, I came across the story of a 13 year old boy who was severely beaten and tortured because he was accused of stealing a bike, which turned out to not be true. He was beaten by four men, while another man video taped it and placed it on social media. This was in Bangladesh. There was a video of him getting beaten and tortured. I did not watch the video and I won't watch the video. But I could see his face, and he was in so much pain.

 

This just breaks my heart. I know it is very girly for a grown man to say that this breaks my heart. But I don't care. It does. I cannot get the images out of my head.

 

It hurts so much to think of what that boy went through. I keep to imagining that I am that little boy getting beaten like that. I also Imagine that I was that boy's parents. I don't think I could survive knowing that somebody cause so much pain to someone that I loved. It hurts so much and I didn't even know that kid. This happens to me all the time and I hate having so much empathy towards people. I cried for hours and hours when I think of the people suffering like this. Well, that's an over-exaggeration I don't cry for hours but I cry a lot. I can't get the images out of my head

 

The face of pain and the face of suffering. The boy crying out. That boy probably cried out to his mother and she was not there. Imagine being that mother and knowing or thinking that your son is crying out for you while he is suffering and you were not there. Well, in my case of course, imagine being a father who was not there for his son.

 

I hate having so much empathy towards people, it is a curse

 

And sometimes it is very hard to talk to other Christians about these things, because then they go off on you and say well you are just as evil as they are. I know that scripture says that if we break one commandment we break them all. But that doesn't mean that I cannot be upset about this. That doesn't mean that I can't feel for that little kid. It doesn't mean that I can't pray for justice for that kid. And it also doesn't mean that I can't hurt for the family. It wasn't just that kid that suffered, it was his parents I'm sure.

 

But Justice was served. Those men got the death penalty. But I am still saddened and hurt by this.

 

How do I have less empathy towards people? How can I not let it destroy me?

Oh wow! What horrible so called Christian told you that your empathy is a bad thing? I can’t even believe they said that! The Bible clearly says to be loving and compassionate towards eachother. Your empathy might feel like a curse but I’m sure God loves that you care about others. He can definitely use that more in people. I actually wish I had more empathy towards people. You see in my case, I grew cold towards people over the years, I have a lot of sympathy for animals though. I have actually been asking God to soften my heart so I can serve him the way he wants me to. As for how to not let it destroy you, I’m not sure how to answer that. Because I can’t relate.